Love, accidentally

Chapter 50

E L E O N O R A

Tristan breaks down.

He collapses on the floor, closed fist to his mouth as the gut-wrenching sobs escape his mouth. Chocked. Pained.

My tears immediately fall too. I walk to him, crouch down to his side and wrap my arms around him. I don't know why I had the feeling that I wanted to protect him. The truth of what I went through in the past years is brutal. I just locked it away–so far away–that I could brush it off now. To survive.

So, seeing him this pained and broken breaks me. Yes, he wasn't there. Yes, I may have needed him. Yes, if he and Dani were with me, it never would've happened. Will I ever blame him? Will I ever blame anyone?

No.

"It's okay, Tristan." I whispered against his ear.

He cried harder.

"How can you..." He stared at me with bloodshot eyes full of undeniable guilt and self-loathing.

I hated it.

"I'm at a better place now. There's no point in thinking about what could have beens and what ifs. I'm okay." I held his face, his tears running down.

"I'm so sorry you had to go through it all. I'm sorry I wasn't–" He was shaking.

"Stop," I shook my head, "I don't want to think about it anymore. You, Will and Nessa are the only ones who know this and I'm asking you just as I asked them. Forget it. Shut it out. I'm here. I'm happy. I have my daughter. I have...you. I chose to go past it in order to live, Tristan. I don't want to have that night replayed ever again. Can you?" My lips were trembling, but I felt stronger than ever.

I survived the war. It was one hell over a war because it was against myself.

I just live with the fact that he's proud of me up there. My dad.

"I..." He shut his eyes, took a breath and opened them with a determined look, "I can, yes."

"Thank you." I smiled.

"I don't deserve you, you know. Never thought I did before and I sure as hell don't now. But this time...I'll give you the stars on a diamond platter and burn the world for you if you so much as think it. I'll be the man you deserve, Vera. Just let me be the man you deserve because...dying sounds so fucking good to what it'd feel like letting you go again. I can't...I don't want to take another breath without you being with me. Please." He rested his forehead against mine, speaking the words with the kind of emotion that made you chocked for words. Made it both harder and easier to breathe. Made you feel overwhelmed with radiant love.

Who was I kidding? I still loved Tristan with everything in me. We both had a battle of our own and we both survived it. We both deserved to have a second chance. I wanted that.

"You had me the first time you called me Vera again. It's been you. It's you right now. It'll always ever be you, Tristan. I want to forget everything that's happened. Because I know that even with everything...you and Dani will always be my happy ending. And I goddamn want that." I breathed against his mouth, our breathes warming the space as we stared into each other.

He released a breath, a sound between a laugh and a sob leaving him. He was looking at me with...hope.

God, it was fucker at times, but I loved hoping.

"I know my promises may be tarnished now, but I want you to know that if the whole world was against us, I'd fight it with guns blazing until my last breath. With you. Always with you." He molded our lips together in a sensual kiss that made me light inside. With life. With love. With hope. Everything.

I deepened the kiss, my chest rising with a new emotion that made me so alive I felt more tears stream down my face. He could feel it too apparently because his face was wet too.

It felt like the world was born again.

We were born again.

***

"You're glowing, love." Will kissed my cheek lightly, his grin widening even with Tristan's arm around my waist.

"British people." Tristan muttered grumpily, rolling his eyes at the term of endearment.

"Jealous?" Will raised an eyebrow at Tristan, his gaze sweeping over him without shame, "I can start calling you love too if you want."

Tristan body vibrated with laughter.

"Only if I get to call you honey." He didn't back down.

What. The. Fuck.

I haven't even formally introduced them yet.

"Um...Do you want me to leave you to hit it off or something?" I smiled while looking between them, shocked.

I did come with Tristan to see Will after all. Did I expect them to not only be civil, but to be flirting only five seconds after seeing each other for the first time? Um...No.

"That would be lovely." Will's grin widened before firing a wink at Tristan.

Wow.

No need to see the seven wonders of the world.

"Eager to get me alone already?" Tristan's eyes glinted with amusement, his eyes meeting mine briefly with a light squeeze on my hip.

"Always." Will said without hesitation, casting me a teasing glance.

I see this meeting was going to be a very interesting one.

Lovely indeed.