DSMP OneShots

Fαƈҽ Iƚ...

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// Third Person POV //
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"Why am I here?" Wilbur looked around at his family and friends as he sat in a wooden chair.

"You'll find out soon, just be patient." Philza looked at his son and then back at the door.

"So... is this like a smoking intervention or something?" He looked around the room, "The fuck- no. You smoke?" Techno stared at him, raising a brow.

"Yes. Yes, I do... is it for drinking? Cause I don't even drink that much-"

"It's not a drinking or smoking intervention- literally no one cares." Tommy facepalmed and looked at Tubbo, "Is he coming or what?"

"He'll be here soon-" Tubbo put his phone away and looked back at Tommy, "Who?"

"You'll know him when you see him-" Tubbo stated, looking over at Wilbur, "It's not Fundy. Right?"

"No- it's not Fund-"
Before Tommy could finish the front door was forced open by a pissed-off axe-welding duck, "WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING IN HERE-" Quackity puffed his feathers and analyzed the room.

Everyone stared at him in horror.
Everyone but Tubbo, "Hi mom!" He waved as Quackity lowered his axe and relaxed his feathers, "Ranboo's not trying to kill you. Huh?"

"THAT'S WHAT YOU TOLD HIM?" Ranboo flinched and looked down at Tubbo.

"Yeah. It got him here, right?"

"Uh-huh. Why am I here?" He set his axe by the door and walked over to everyone else, glancing at Wilbur, "What is this some kind of smoking intervention or something?"

"Nope, not really sure what this is-"

"Both of you sit down." Phil gently pushed Quackity over to a chair next to Wilbur and everyone surrounded them.

"So. You two are gay, yes?" Tommy bluntly stated.

"What-"

"I've nearly married 4 men, the fuck do you think?"

"Uh-huh. Well, you two remember L'manburg times. Yes?" Techno pressed his hand to Tommy's face to shut him up.

"...Yeah?"

"I remember somethings."

"What about Pogtopia?"

Quackity and Wilbur glanced at each other and then looked back at the group of people surrounding them.

"I wasn't really mentally right then-"

"I don't really remember much."

"Really?" Bad questioned and stood up a bit, "Not even when you asked Wilbur to have..."

"Sex." Skeppy filled in.

"With you." Bad finished.

"I didn't say that-"

"I feel like I would have remembered that-"

Both Wilbur and Quackity's faces turned a light shade of pink, Quackity kept a poker face while Wilbur was failing to keep his eyes off of Quackity.

"Okay, do you remember killing Quackity by breaking some glass underneath him?" Bad raised an eyebrow and continued to stare at the two.

"I don't remember him doing that."

"Why would I do that?"

"Okay. What about how Quackity didn't have his own room in Pogtopia?" Tommy cocked a brow at the two and looked at Wilbur, "And how I would always see him walk out of YOUR room."

"There wasn't enough room for me to have my own."

"I didn't really sleep much."

Everyone collectively sighed.
"What abouttt..." Tubbo started and looked around, thinking.

"How about when Schlatt literally called out you two having an affair?" Niki butted in, catching everyone off guard.

"Uh-"

"He'll say anything-"

Niki cocked a brow, "Okay, well you also made out at my party-"

Quackity stared at Niki and sighed pitching his nose bridge and Wilbur's face went red.

"Why are you bringing this up?" Quackity folded his arms and tapped his foot.

"Because you two are gay in denial."

"I am gay though?"

"I'm bi-"

"Can you just face it and say you love each other so we can end this shit?"

"We don't though?"

"I'm not ready to say that yet."

"What-"

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-Word Count: 562-