43. I had enough

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Taehyung Pov:

I was standing under the cold water, trying to cool down my burning up body. It wasn't really that easy because I was still a devil and my body temperature was normally at 40 degree celsius but for some reason today I felt horrible. I wanted my body to freeze. My fingers were already turning blue because I put the water as cold as possible but I didn't care and just stood there with my eyes closed and let the water run down my naked body. Suddenly I heard a sound coming from my room and that made me turn the water off and listen carefully. Was he trying to escape again or did something happen? Or maybe I was just imagining it.
"No!" Now I heard his voice clearly and it was obvious that I wasn't imagining nothing. I jumped out of the shower and pulled my clothes over my still wet body and ran outside. The room was still dark so I had to search for the light switch first while I was still trying to pull my shirt on my head. I switched the light on and saw him still laying in the bed but he was sleeping. Maybe not so peacefully because he was moving around a lot and his eyebrows scrunched. Wa she having a bad dream?

 Wa she having a bad dream?

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"Let go." He said in his sleep and I really wanted to know what he was dreaming about. Was it the place he came from? His family? Or maybe even me? Was I the reason for his nightmares? Most likely. I wasn't sure if I should go up to him or even touch him because if he was actually dreaming about me then he most likely wouldn't want to see me in real life either. It made my black heart hurt to see him sleep so uneasy but I had no idea what to do.
"Stop!" This time he yelled a bit louder and turned over to his side which almost made him fall down the bed. I quickly stepped closer and caught him just in time. That's it. I had to wake him up. I carefully grabbed his shoulder a shook him a little but that didn't do much. He was sleeping way to deep.
"Jungkook wake up." I shook him again and realized just now that this was the first time I actually said his name out loud. It rolled down my tongue so naturally as if I have been using it all my life already. It sent shivers down my back right away. I couldn't really think to much about it because Jungkook suddenly ripped his eyes open and jumped up in the bed.

 I couldn't really think to much about it because Jungkook suddenly ripped his eyes open and jumped up in the bed

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He scooted over to the corner so he would be as far from me as only possible. I could see in his eyes that he was still very much in pain but he was still so frightened that he didn't care as long he was away from me. From my hands being able to reach him. Why did it hurt so bad? Why was my chest in pain again even though he wasn't crying this time?
"No no no! Don't touch me! I didn't run! Don't hurt me I didn't try to escape." He covered his head with one hand and held the other one in front of him to protect himself while he was yelling and begging. I couldn't take it anymore. My whole body was in pain because he was this scared of me. Even in his sleep he couldn't be at peace because of me. I didn't want this. I didn't want to be the reason for his tears and trauma. I wanted to be the reason for his smile. For his laugh. For his happiness. This whole shit situation was making me want to punch myself and now I really had enough. I slipped closer to him and placed his face between my two hands. He flinched by my sudden action and stared me deep into the eyes. My serious face didn't really make the situation any better and I could already feel his small figure start shaking under my touch. This made me soften my expression and I almost looked at him pleadingly.

 This made me soften my expression and I almost looked at him pleadingly

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"I won't hurt you, okay? I will never hurt you ever again. Look at all this stuff. I'm trying to heal you. I won't hurt you and no one else will. I know you have no reason to trust me but I am saying the truth. I couldn't hurt you again." I told him while I was staring deep into his eyes and his confusion was obvious. Slowly his body stopped shaking but his eyes still shoved the fear in them but they were now mixed with a shocked and confused look. Suddenly he removed his eyes from mine and tried to figure out what would be the best thing to say right now.
"W-why did you suddenly change y-your mind?" He stuttered a little while asking. Most likely because he was still afraid to say anything that would make me mad. I sighed.
"There are a lot of things that you don't know."...

"

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