81. Pronouns

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Haresa

Okay, I gained some confidence in this mission.

We just needed provisions and maybe some necessary equipment but if we could get this all done by tonight then we could get ready to leave by tomorrow even after we finished all of our homework—

"Focus," Sheldon said to me and I felt a flick on my cheek.

"I am." The back of my hand rubbed my cheek aggressively.

We were in the GSA room after school but it was just Sheldon and Mr. Dunson and me. Mr. Dunson wasn't actively part of the conversation as he graded papers in the classroom next door while Sheldon and I planned the big event for GSA.

"I can't believe you tried to become president, you can barely choose which activity the club should do," Sheldon said.

"I was just saying a school trip would be too hard," I pointed at the list of options in front of us. "Something in the school would be easier to manage and we wouldn't have to stress about deadlines and funding."

He absentmindedly began to cross out options on the sheet. "Wouldn't we need money for that still?"

"If we do a school dance, we would just need to borrow the drama club's lights, hook up music to the school speakers and maybe do some decoration," I said.

"Why did you even try to become president anyways?" Sheldon doodled a circle on the paper and his eyes flicked to me. "You're always jumping out of the window to save whoever was dumb enough to get in trouble. You've barely got enough time to do homework."

"What would you know?" I asked him. My tone was sharp but the harshness of my question didn't seem to bother him.

He paused. "I never took you for stupid."

"That's a lie."

"Okay, you're stupid but not that stupid."

"Thanks," I replied dryly.

"But you staying up late to do homework is pretty annoying."

My nose scrunched up. "You noticed?"

"I am right next to you now. I can't help but notice things."

I wanted to utter an excuse or some sort of explanation so that he wouldn't be as upset with me but there was a knock on the door.

"Hey there," Mia said. She sat there in her wheelchair with her bag sitting on her lap. "Is it cool if I steal Haresa for a moment? I swear I'll bring her back."

Sheldon looked between her and me and he shrugged. "Whatever."

My body slowly rose from the seat and I looked back to Sheldon to see if it was really okay. He raised his eyebrow in response as the rest of his expression remained disinterested. I sighed and made my way out of the hallway to speak to Mia.

"So, what's up?" I asked her and she shrugged.

"Just wanted to check how you were doing being president of the GSA club and all," she said.

I froze. "Well, about that..."

She blinked. "What? You flaked out?"

My body only tensed up more. I wasn't bothered because she sounded upset when she said it but it bothered me because it sounded like she expected me to ditch president duties.

"No, it's not that."

"Haresa, you don't have to lie. I know being a hero is a lot of work." Her eyes refused to meet mine. "It just seems like it gets in the way of a lot of things."

"Mia—"

"You think they would be a good president?" Sheldon scoffed.

Mia stared up at him with confusion. "They've been a good vice president up to this point. I don't see why she wouldn't."

"I know them, I'm their childhood nemesis," he pinched my cheek and I swatted his hand away. "They would make the club 'fun' and 'welcoming' and all the stupid shit that heroes like doing."

Mia's eye twitched. "I don't see what's wrong with that."

"Just because we have gay marriage doesn't mean we have equal rights. We should be disruptive and loud," Sheldon said with a wicked smile.

Mia seemed taken aback and looked between him and me. "Have you made any progress with club stuff?"

"Yeah, we have," I said. "Hasn't been easy."

"You're just sad that I'm more popular than you. Wouldn't be here if everyone hadn't voted for me," Sheldon turned to Mia. "Was there anything else you need to talk to my vice president about? I was close to winning against them."

"You weren't winning anything," I said.

"What? You're going to say it's a collaborative effort? You're going to make me gag," he said.

I scanned his face trying to find any hint of why he was acting weird. He was exaggerating himself, pretending that we were just fighting over control when in reality we were just fine a few minutes prior. His head tilted slightly towards Mia as he stared back at me and I sighed. I saw how it was.

"Just give me five more minutes, I need to get away from you for a bit," I said as I leaned into his performance.

He raised his hands and began to walk away. "Whatever you say, hare."

I gave Mia an apologetic smile and cleared my throat. "Was there anything else you wanted to talk to me about?"

She shifted in her wheelchair. "I know it's been some time since we broke up but..."

My eyebrows scrunched together and my breath hitched.

"I was wondering if I should change my pronoun use for you," she said.

My mind went blank. "Um."

"You don't have to answer right now but a lot of people have been asking why I use she/her pronouns for you and it's just awkward to tell them that I was given permission when we were dating and we're not really friends anymore."

My stomach twisted into knots. "Yeah, I... you can use my other pronouns if you want."

"The female pronouns?"

"Um, uh..."

"I think they mean their they/them pronouns," Sheldon butted in again. He stood next to me again and had a forearm on the doorframe this time. I gave him an incredulous look and he shrugged. "I'm not good with time."

"Yeah? Would that make you comfortable, Haresa?" Mia asked.

My eyes were glued to the ground and I nodded. "If you don't mind."

"I totally don't, that's why I'm asking."

"Then yeah, might just be easier."

"Great," Mia took out her phone to check the time. "I should get to basketball practice now. The bus has to drive me to a specialized court. I'll see you two around."

"Bye!" Sheldon said a little too cheerfully.

As she rolled away, my shoulders began to shake but no tears fell. I shouldn't feel sad for myself.


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