Lost Memories (APHMAU FANFIC)

Trying to Let Go

Aphmau's POV:

     It's been a day or two since that whole 'incident' played out. I'm so glad that everyone accepted me, especially Katelyn. I got so nervous about telling her, I didn't think she would. Today has been as decent as it could get. Alina went crazy again, and she jumped on me, leading to the inevitable of my falling over and hurting my back. I sat down for the rest of the day, which wasn't that long. And finally to end off the day, I got in bed and slowly drifted off into dreamland.

     I thought I would be talking to Blaze today, but I guess not. He wasn't there, and neither was I. I wasn't in a black void. I was in a place I didn't recognize. It was completely white, but my surroundings slowly changed into a background. I was in front of a ginormous house made of logs. Feeling chills go up my spine, I chose to enter the house. I opened the door, and the door automatically locked behind me, and I wanted out.

     I was completely surrounded by a bright green. There was nothing but this color. Not even the door was there anymore. I could only see green, and I felt as if I could only see black. I felt pain overflowing my body all over again, in more ways than one. My eyes flooded with tears, and my legs became weak. I collapsed to the green floor and curled myself up on the floor. I leaned on the wall I couldn't see and lightly rocked myself. Memories broke my brain, and I felt I began to hallucinate. I saw Ein, beating me to the ground. I saw Aaron colliding with the soft snow that turned blood red. I saw my friends, hurting one another, only trying to please Ein. And lastly, I saw a beam go through my chest, and my eyes closed shut.

     I was gone. Or at least that's what I felt. Now I was cursed to see that retched color for the rest of eternity. It brought back so much. It overwhelmed me. I couldn't take this fear that was imprinted in my brain. A fear that I fear would never go away. That I would never be able to let go. Suddenly, an image flashed in my face, and I woke up sweat pouring all over my face, In bed, safe at last. I tried to picture the image I saw in my dream, but I was lost. It came by so fast, and it was so blurry. I gave up and wiped the water off my forehead. I didn't realize I had screamed when I woke up, but apparently I did, because Aaron burst into the room, with Melissa on his tail and Alina in the back.

     "What happened? Are you okay?" Aaron rushed over to me. I nodded and relaxed in my bed.

     "Did you have a bad dream again?" He asked. I nodded again, for some reason unable to speak. Aaron smiled at me and sat on the bed. He held my hand closest to him, and squeezed it gently.

     "You're gonna get through this. You know that, right?" Aaron asked. I feel like this is the most serious he's talked to me so far. I reluctantly nodded my head quickly and he smiled.

     "Good. I'm gonna help you get through this. We're gonna help you get through this. Okay?" He asked me one last time. I returned his smile back to him and nodded my head.

     "Okay." I said. My voice was a little raspy, and I sounded tired than I was. I wonder how much sleep I got. I look at the clock and saw it was twelve. I guess Aaron let me sleep in again. This is the third time this week. I should really tell him to get me waking up at nine. I don't want to get used to waking up late. When I got out of bed, I noticed Aaron's hoodie wasn't where it was supposed to be. I looked all over my room, turning the place upside down looking for it.

     "Whatcha looking for- WOAH!! HEY! DON'T THROW ME ACROSS THE ROOM!!" Woof said. I didn't even realize I threw her.

     "Oh, whoops. Sorry Woof." I said, continuing to scramble up my things in search of that hoodie.

     "Could you answer my question, please?" Woof asked irritatedly.

     "I'm looking for Aaron's hoodie. It isn't on its hook." I said.