It Ain't Easy

101 5 2
                                    

Sammy

"No you wasn't!" Suzette pinched up her pretty ass face as she crossed her arms and put all her weight on one foot.

"How you gone tell me what I was thinking, Suzette?" I asked as I sat on the bench at the foot of our bed and reached to pull her close but she stepped away.

"Because you wasn't! You can't tell me that you was sending my son out on the streets to sell dope to some feigns because you was thinking about me," she snapped and walked away.

I sighed and stood to follow her out of our room and down the hall to her closet. She slammed the door in my face and I chuckled before opening the door and closing it gently behind myself. I leaned against the door and watched her sit at her lil makeup set up and start to wipe her face clean. "Shakur ain't never had to deal with no feign— at least not by my hand."

"Let me ask you something," she paused as she wiped the red lipstick from her lips, "When I was calling you at one and two in the morning panicking because he was flaunting sneakers and jewelry and coming and going and bringing whatever the hell in my house as he pleased— that was you?"

I walked over quietly and stood behind her. "No, Suzette. I ain't have nothing to do with that."

"What about when he was skipping school? And coming home mad as a demon with bruised knuckles and bloody clothes?"

"That ain't have shit to do with me, Suzette! Why the fuck do you think I would put my boy in a position like that? Who do you think I am?!" I asked as I sat beside her.

"I think you a fuckin' liar!" She pointed her finger in my face and I pushed it away.

"Well it take one to know one, huh?!"

"And I learned it from the best of the best," she cupped my face and I pushed her hands off my skin and stood back up.

"You know what... if it wasn't for me that boy would be dead!" I snapped and Suzette jumped.

"You think you think you saw that boy at his worst?! You didn't— I did!"

"What the hell you talking about?" Suzette hollered as she stood to her feet and I just shook my head. "If you don't know now I ain't boutta tell you. Ion't even know why I'm doin' this shit witchu," I huffed and turned to go for the door. Just as I reached for the handle Suzette slipped in between me and the door.

"Move Suzette," I said sternly as she folded her hands behind her back and shook her head.

"No. You need to tell me what you talkin' about."

"I don't have to do a damn thing. Move, Suzette," I reiterated and she crossed her arms and leaned against the door.

"Why are you doing this?" I asked as I took a step back and watched her cock her head to the side and squint her eyes.

"We promised that no matter what we wouldn't keep no more secrets from each other. You tellin' me you can't keep up yo end of the deal?"

I took a deep breath. "I know what I promised you. But I promised my son somethin' too. He wanted to tell you— he made me swear I wouldn't say anything to you about this."

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