If Only You Knew (Larry Stylinson)

Chapter 49.

                                                      EPILOGUE 

Let’s just say that, that week was one of the best things to happen to me. Besides having Louis as my boyfriend and you know making love to him. Ever since that day things have been going in my favor. After that heated day we actually had the courage to tell the boys what we did and what our relationship status was. They took it exactly how I thought they would take it. At first they all started laughing and winking at Louis and I, and bugging us but then they all hugged us and said they were really proud of us. 

We also stood up to Simon and Management, they didn’t take it well at all. Simon was not happy with it at first but as he saw how happy we were together and how we were not backing down he agreed to it and he told us he was happy for us. Management is honestly neutral to the whole thing, they obviously don’t agree with it but seeing as we won’t change our mind they just kind of have to suck it up. 

The fans...wow. They took so well, twitter was hectic that day we announced we were together the fans were writing to us saying they knew it and it was about time and things along those lines. It made me so happy that they accepted us and that they saw the signs and they knew we were in love with each other and they were happy for us.  This is why I love our fans. 

With me.. let’s just say I don’t know what bad habits are anymore. I have stopped cutting, I have stopped purging, and that stupid idiotic voice in my head is gone for good. Louis has made me see that I need to be happy with who I am, that I don’t need to go to the extreme to please people, because those people who actually want to be in my life will not care how I look, they’ll care about who I amand they’ll want the best for me. I still have the beautiful scars on my body, each scar tells a story and reminds me of how much I struggled to be perfect, and howmuch I tried to fit into society. But there’s just one problem: Perfect isn’t real. Society is wrong. Society has its idea of beauty, but fuck it. Society makes it believe wehave to live up to certain standards to be perfect, if you’re not society’s idea of skinnyor pretty society makes you feel like you’re not worth it. But here is the twist:  We are society. And if we are tired of the shitty way we have to be in order to live up to people’s standards we should do something about it.  Louis made me realize this, and he made me realize that I don’t need to impress anyone to be happy. 

In our relationship marriage has come up a few times, every single time we talk about it, Louis always smiles and he says he would honestly marry me at the moment if he could. And yes I have thought about marriage and yes I do want to marry Louis as soon as possible, but I’m waiting for the right time and when we are settled and who knows maybe when I ask him to marry me we could buy a bigger house and we could adopt a kid and just be one big happy family. Not a day goes by where I don’t imagine my future with Louis, and with Louis in my life my future is finally bright and I love it. Louis is everything to me, I love him to the moon and back. I would die for him in a heartbeat. Louis makes my heartbeat a mile a minute and he makes me feel like a teenage girl. 

I can finally say I’m happy, and I never thought I would say that but i’ve had a huge smile on my face for who knows how long. I’m happy with my life and I know it’ll stay that way. 

P.s: never keep your mouth shut or bottle up your feelings about someone, because they just might feel the same way about. Life is about taking risk and being on the edgeand maybe that risk will lead you to a better life than you ever imagined and maybe when you jump off the edge you are welcome might a cold refreshing water telling you that it’s a new start. Say how you feel and never be sorry for it, because if you say you’re sorry for saying how you feel it’s like saying sorry for being real. 

 I’m Harry Styles..and I’m glad he knows.