𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐎𝐑─𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐦 𝐝𝐮𝐧𝐛𝐚𝐫

41.

 I stood at the top of the staircase, that led to the bottom floor of our house. I watched curiously as two young children slowly crept to the top, peering down. I knew these two. The two kids were Scott and I. Scott was about 10, which would make me 8. I was having another memory but this time, I was watching through 3rd person, it was like I was watching a movie.

Scott, and 8 year old me sat down on the top stair, in order to be able to see more of the scene downstairs. Our parents we fighting again. Dad had come home drunk, and mom was reprimanding him for that. Mom hated when he got like this, she had warned him thousands of time that she was at the end of her rope but he never listened.

"Rafe, we can't do this! I can't have you around my children when all you do is drink!"

"They're my children too Melissa!" he snapped, his words slurred. 

"Well then act like it!"

Silence settled over the room, only being broken when Scott moved slightly, the creaking sound of the floor boards filling the room.

Our parents heads snapped towards the two young McCall children.

"What the hell are you two doing?" Our father started up the stairs towards the two of us.

I watched in horror as he grabbed a hold of Scott's arms, eight year old me took a few small steps back, as she started to cry.

Scott struggled against our father, and before I knew it I watched as he tumbled down the stairs.

"SCOTT!"

"SYDNEY!" I shot up from my bed, gasping for air, as I looked around the room.

Scott was in front of me, a terrified look on his face. "Syd-"

"It was another memory." I whispered, my eyes wet with tears, as I still struggled to catch my breath.

My brother's eyes grew wide, "Syd, breathe!" he ordered.

I shook my head, struggling to calm my breathing. It was like my lungs weren't working.  "I can't!" I tired.

"You're having one again." Scott pointed out as he pulled me towards his chest. He held me close. "Match your breathing to mine." he instructed.

I did as he said, focusing on his breathing which in turn calmed my own. Soon enough it had returned to somewhat of a normal pace. "What was that?" I whimpered, keeping my head pressed against my brother's chest.

Scott sighed as he glanced down at me, "A panic attack."

"I haven't had one in a year." I whispered, my voice shaky.

After my dad left, I started to struggle with anxiety attacks, and had frequent panic attacks. Once I turned 15 they seemed to stop. It was a weird time for them to end, considering I was starting high school, as well as dealing with everything Scott and his friends were going through, but they stopped. And now they were back.

"My asthma's back, and Stiles has been acting out, not to mention what's happening with Kira" Scott admitted, "And now you, now you are having panic attacks, and-and I feel like all of this is because of me."

"Scott," I mumbled, pulling back so I could look at him,  "It's not your fault." I promised, "It's just this whole thing with the Dread Doctors."

"It is my fault!" he boomed, causing me to flinch, "I dragged everybody into this mess and I don't know how to fix it."

It was now my turn to comfort him, "We'll find a way, we always find a way."

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