Little Wolf // Twilight Saga // Jacob Black

9. Us

KIKI

"We'll be back soon, Kiki. If you need anything call Kim or Billy, okay?" Sam says standing by the front door. I nod.

"Okay." I fake a smile and he walks out the door. I don't like this. I don't like being left alone anymore. Yeah it's nice to have privacy, but I don't like being home alone. Not since I got out. It doesn't feel right. Why couldn't Sam have me go with him? Jake's going. It's just a vampire. I don't like this. I pace back and forth and bite down on my thumb nail. Tears start to form in my eyes and I bite harder, causing the nail to snap. I spit the nail out and pace anxiously. I let out an anxious noise and sit down on the couch, my mind going a million miles per hour, my heart coming pretty close. My hands start to shake and I can barely breathe. Tears start sliding down my face as I gasp for air. My palms become sweaty and my hands shake more. I know what this is.

Panic attack.

I slide off the couch and land on my knees in the floor. I try to slow my breathing and my watery eyes look everywhere. I wheeze and claw at the fabric near my throat, even though it was a really low cut shirt. My shaking hands press palm down against the floor and I suck in a quick breath- the attack only getting worse. I choke on air and more tears spill over. My heart pounds, my head throbs, and my lungs burn. I lay on my back and try to catch my breath. I choke more and try to get air in. My hands shake viscously and my head spins. I hear a car pull in then the front door open.

"Kiki? Kiki!" Kim runs to me and gets on her knees beside me. "Is it a panic attack?" She asks tucking some of her hair behind her ear. I nod as I try to catch another breath. "Jared called and said I needed to come here. I drove as fast as I could." She shakes her head for a second before pushing the hair out of my face and holding one of my trembling hands. "It's okay, it's okay. Just breathe. It's okay." I struggle to get air into my lungs and wheeze harder. "Deep breaths, in through your nose out through your mouth." I inhale then exhale. "Slower, let the air stay in your lungs for a few seconds." I try and I start choking and wheezing. "Easy, it's okay. Take a deep breath with me. In." She inhales deeply through her nose. She slowly exhales. "Out. In." She inhales again. "Out." She exhales. I follow with her until my lungs stop burning. My hands still slightly shake and a few stray tears slip.  "Do you want to try to sit up?" I nod and she helps me sit up. She places a hand on my back and keeps her other one in mine. "What happened?" I shake my head.

"I-I-I-I d-don't-t kn-now." I stutter. She nods slowly.

"It's okay, just take a deep breath." I listen and she nods again. The phone rings and she answers it. "Yeah." She smiles at me. "Okay. Yeah, bye." She hangs up the phone. "That was Sam, he said they were coming back. Do you want to go to your room so you aren't swarmed by a million people?" I nod. She smiles sympathetically and helps me stand. My legs are wobbly at first, but she manages to help get to my bed. I sit down and take a deep breath. "Do you want me to stay in here with you until they get here?" She asks.

"Y-yeah." I nod before taking another deep breath. She gently rubs my back. I pull my knees up to my chest and wrap my arms around my legs. I rest my chin in between my knees and stare at the ground. I hear running and I glance out the window. They're back. I look back toward my open door. Sam appears and smiles sadly.

"Are you okay kiddo?" Sam asks. I nod. "Kim, Jared wants you." He states. She nods.

"Feel better for me sweetie. Okay?" She kisses my forehead before leaving the room. He glances over his shoulder then back to me.

"What triggered it?" He asks quietly.

"I don't know, being home by myself maybe. I'm not sure." I shake my head.

"That's more than likely what it was. We haven't left you home alone since you got back, maybe it's just the feeling of being alone that's been triggering everything lately." He states. "Do you wanna see Jake?" I look up at him and nod with a slight smile. "Alrighty then." He nods and walks away. I stare at the floor until I hear footsteps approaching. I move my knees from my chest and slowly start to stand. Jake comes through the door and we wrap our arms around each other, holding each other closer than close. I bury my face in the crook of his neck and take in his scent. He buries his face in my hair and inhales. He slowly pulls his head away.

"Are you okay?" He whispers. I smile.

"I am now." I reply. I look into his eyes and smile again. He smiles back and pulls me even closer- even though it is pretty much impossible for us to move closer. Our faces move closer and our lips meet, sending chills up my spine. His hands spread on the small of my back and we kiss again. We slowly pull away and rest our foreheads on each other. We both smile and slightly pull apart.

"What about now?" He smirks. I grin.

"Even better." I say just before we kiss yet again. It's a new feeling, but I like this new feeling.

It's the feeling of us.