Shit, I'm Falling For A Weasley || George Weasley

Chapter 44 - In which I keep failing at everything I try

Do you ever find that the more you try not to think about something, the more your brain can't stop thinking about it? It's like every little thing leads back to that one thing that you don't want to think about and you know you shouldn't think about it, but it's as if the universe is out to ensure that you spend every waking moment contemplating about that thing. 

Why is it that I'm so obsessed with one tiny phrase some person told me? 

"Miss Argent?" 

I blink up at the Minstery official who gives me a disapproving look. I hastily get off from the ground where I had been taking a break. Apparation is a lot harder than it looks and when I saw Bones' legs separate from her body I decided it was time for a much needed break. That was three weeks ago, not that it matters much anyway.

"Remember the three Ds, no need to give up now!" He says in a bright voice causing me to scowl.

"Yes, yes, I know. Destination, determination, detonation," I mutter causing the man's eyes to bulge out.

"No, no, no Miss Argent definitely not detonation. Deliberation" He says rather forcefully and I just give him a small nod. I mean it's not like anyone's going to be successful on these lessons so what's the point of using up all our mental energy on this stupid exercise?

"Okay deliberation," I say in a curt voice, causing the man's bright demeanor to falter slightly. My lips twitch as I prevent myself from smiling- it's fun to see people get annoyed by simple actions. He pauses for a moment as if he's considering saying something more but I just stare levelly at him causing him to reconsider and walk off to his colleague, whispering furiously whilst giving me a not-very-subtle look. 

Muttering darkly under my breath I turn back to the hoop and stare at it with immense concentration. My eyes can't help but wander around the room as they finally land on a guy in the corner with a similar frustrated look on his face. I still haven't spoken to Malfoy after everything that has happened and I'm not too sure whether I want to anymore. Is it fair of me to desert him just because I now have other people in my corner? It's his own fault for pushing me away, I've tried everything to get him to open up to me, but he's being too stubborn. 

Grey eyes snap to meet my own and for a split second my hard gaze falters, before I hastily look away. That's the fifth time since coming back to Hogwarts that he's caught me looking at him, not that I've been counting or anything. 

I can't help it. It just doesn't make any sense. Snape's acting weird as well. There's some big secret that they're both working on together without me and it frustrates me. I know that's pretty much what I'm doing- working on a secret mission- but I just assumed that if you're in with the bad guys- you're all in. I guess not. It hasn't stopped me from seeing if I can follow him when he disappears off at the end of every day. 

The Ministery Official gives a small cough snapping me out of my thoughts. I go back to glaring at the hoop realising that weirdly enough I would much rather be in the Burrow instead of stuck here. My eyes narrow as his words enter my mind again for what feels like the millionth time. Shaking my head, I go back to thinking about the three Ds and trying to Apparate myself to go anywhere but here. 

The session ends just as fruitless as the ones before and I can see other people picking up my frustration which adds a little silver lining to the whole situation. Ginny gives me a sympathetic look as I sit next to her in the common room. 

"No luck?" She asks and I just scowl at the wall. 

"It's pointless and stupid and a waste of my time," I grumble causing her to smile as she flicks through a Potions book. Her workload has increased crazily due to the upcoming OWLs but I find it better for us. I mean Ginny and I aren't the best of friends, but since she comforted me that night I had the nightmare, I've just naturally grown closer to her. No matter how much I tried pushing her away, it didn't work, so I may as well accept the fact that Ginny is just too loyal to me to see that I'm not the same person I was.