Amour

THE LETTER

Snape emptied the last of his glass of firewhisky and savoured the burning sensation in his throat.You deserve this.And much more...after what you did to her.How could you be soinconsiderate,so heartless ?You always have to be a bastard,don't you?I still can't believe it..those scars,those marks of my rejection,turned as flaws on her perfect skin.You drove her to the point of being suicidal!He smashed the glass down on the floor in self hatred.Then he sat holding his head in his hands in utter despair.You've lost her forever.Yet...I had to do it.It was for her own good...yeah,you keep telling yourself that,my friend...for the rest of your life.There was a small tap on his window and he looked up to see a snowy white owl sitting on the window sill.Hermione's owl!He opened the window to let it in and it delivered a letter and promptly flew away.It was from Hermione,adressed to him.Snape opened it with shaking hands and read:

Sir,please don't tear and throw this letter away before atleast having a glance at what I have to say.I couldn't possibly make my thoughts coherent to you without dissolving in my own tears, had I said this in person;thus I'm taking the help of this letter.I wanted to let you know that my affection for you has in no way diminished by your rejection the other day,I don't believe it ever can.I was actually made to realise something.The little physical harm that I inflicted upon myself was just a bit of poor judgement on my part and a spur-of-the-moment thing,as a result of the after-effect of getting a cold denial from the one I love.It won't happen again,I promise.I won't guilt trap you into loving me.   
       I thought about it a lot and realised that I'm the one who fell in love with you,you didn't ask me to.Nor was there any obligation for you to love me back.So I was acting stupid by being angry on you for doing something you were absolutely innocent of.Perhaps the lack of love in my personal life led me to hope against hope that you were falling in love with me just the way I was with you....but that is it,I guess.I could'nt help but be in love with you;I'm sorry,but..not sorry.
      That time,when you were in the hospital wing,under intensive care from the werewolf attack,I held your hand and tried to imagine a world without you and a despairing fear gripped me.I feared that you might not ever get to know what I actually felt and that's when I knew that I had to tell you as soon as possible.I prayed to God to let you live so that we could get more time,to fall in love,for me to just tell you how I actually felt,and just wishing you felt the same.I'm thankful that I have opened myself up to you and even though I've faced rejection,atleast I don't have to count my days thinking  'what if?          
             This is my one and only life;and it's a great and terrible and short and endless thing and none of us come out of it alive.We don't get to choose if we get hurt in this world,but we do have some say in who hurts us.I like my choice.I hope you like yours.To me personally,it would be a privilege to have my heart broken by you.
PS:I will always love you.