another chance 🌹• jb-kj

nineteen: illusions

Justin

"When are you ever going to introduce me to the people in your office, its been years" She said while she was laying on my bed, reading a magazine and I rolled my eyes as I tied the black bow tie around my neck.

"I would've if you were worth showing around.....and if I ever really wanted you" I said.

I sprayed my cologne and by the time I was done, she had came and stood behind me.

"Angela please, not now" I said as I walked to the nightstand to grab my phone.

"Why are you like this to me when I try so hard?" She said.

"Because you aren't the person I was supposed to end up with! You are a mistake and nothing else and all you do is use me for my money and I'm staying here and dealing with you just for Marilyn because I know that if I walk away from you, you wouldn't blink twice before starting trouble that five year old at all" I yelled 

"Justin I don't care what you think, take me to this party" She said and I looked at her in disbelief.

"And what are you going to prove there? How much you suck at making people happy? This party is about celebrating my and my employees' success and I'm not going to destroy it for you" I said and stormed out of the house before the anxiety attack hit me.

I've had three of those in the last week and they've stopped after I spent my birthday with Shayra.

I sat in the car and the thought of Shayra instantly calmed me.

If I only had Shayra to support me with this, I would've left Angela already but instead, I drew that stupid diagram and locked her behind a wall she thinks she can never break.

The irritation made its way back when I started thinking about how I've distanced Shayra. But at least that night told me that she isn't totally into Kevin. If she was, she would've never even let me spend that day with her.

I went through a chain of calming down and tensing up till I reached the party venue and the chauffeur opened the door of the car for me and I got out and thanked him.

As soon as I got in, Giselle accompanied me since some people were waiting to meet me.

"Hey, I need a drink, I'll do this later" I said to Giselle.

"Oh okay" She said.

"Which one do you-

"No, I'll get it myself, I'll be at the bar if you need me" I said and she nodded before I walked to the bar.

"A scotch please" I said to the bartender and he nodded.

I looked around the extravagantly decorated place as I took a sip of my drink and my eyes stopped on Shayra who just walked in.

Straightened hair, dark red lips and she wore a sparkly, long silver dress with thin straps that fit the theme perfectly. 

My mental admiration of Shayra suddenly stopped when she spotted me and started walking to me but instead of Shayra, I started seeing Lily.

No no no, this is happening to me again, I'm hallucinating. That's the last thing I want to do tonight.

This only happens when I become extremely stressed. 

"Hey, that's a cute little bow there" Shayra's voice snapped me out of the illusion and I smiled.

"Thanks, you look gorgeous" I said and she smiled and sat on the bar stool beside me.

"Kevin fell sick so he couldn't make it" She said.

"Uh, yeah, I got his message" I said and tried to breathe deeply to calm myself.