This is, by popular demand, a continuation of The Sun, the Moon and Stars.
If you wish to continue, these will be the next installments. Thank you to all that are reading and enjoying my escape from reality.
Both of our heads jerk towards him at the same time, he meets my eyes for a split second before focusing on the doctor.
"If you do wish to get pregnant, I suggest you wait until after her first normal cycle." the doctor explains.
I'm still staring at him in awe, he can't be serious. "I'm over 40," I mutter.
The doctor looks at me, "A safe and healthy pregnancy is possible after 40. Your medical history shows no red flags for me to advise against it."
Prince is paying careful attention, I just want to get out of this room.
The doctor finally asks, "Do you have any more questions?" We look at each other and shake our heads. "Good luck on which decision you go with. Dana, do you need a prescription for the pills, or do you still have refills?"
"I have seven refills left," I answer.
"Good. Just let me know if you have anymore questions," she stands and leaves the room.
Prince and I stay seated after the door closes. He turns to look at me with those big brown eyes of his, they're pleading with me. Mine counter his for a few seconds, then close, I just can't right now.
"Let's go, Sugar," he whispers, pulling on my hand as he stands.
As we're making our way out, Prince pauses when he sees the doctor down the hallway, "I'll be right back," he tells me, heading her way.
I watch them talk a minute, she looks bothered, he does a lot of head nodding as she speaks. He returns to me looking at ease.
"Okay, Baby, let's get out of here," taking my hand we head to the car.
We get to the car, he opens the door, I stand making no attempt to get in, I'm just staring at my surroundings.
"Sugar?"
We've only been about forty minutes into the two hour window we gave Angel and Marcus, I think.
I look at him, "Prince, where are we going?"
"Home?" The concern on his face is evident.
I didn't mean a destination, I shake my head, "I don't want to go home right now."
"Okay, where do you want to go? Just name it," he waits.
"I don't know this area, you do. Do you have a place you like to go to think?"
I can tell a place enters his mind, he nods.
"Take me there, please," I finally crawl into the car.
We get back on the expressway, in a short amount of time I see Paisley Park come into view. I'm discouraged because I hoped he might share someplace new with me. To my surprise he drives past the building, then we turn off the main road onto a more wooded one. He pulls into a driveway that's blocked by a gate, it has a peace sign and a heart on it. I recognize this as one of his properties. He gets out, unlocks the gate, drives through and re-locks it.
He's deep in thought as he does all this, and I get the feeling this is a very personal space for him, I'm grateful to be allowed in. Driving to end of what appears to have been a driveway, he stops, kills the engine and comes around to my side. He opens the door, taking my hand, we walk in silence down a gravel walkway.
We walk quite a distance until we are surrounded by an ocean of yellow dandelions amongst the tall grasses and trees, it's wild, yet peaceful. I find a spot just off of the gravel and sit cross legged on the ground. Prince follows suit sitting beside me, watching me intently. I fold my hands on my lap, adjust my posture and close my eyes, taking several deep, cleansing breaths. On the second exhale I feel his hand reach for mine, I take it, opening one eye to see he's doing the deep breathing with me. We are trying to absorb the peacefulness of the area, trying to center ourselves.
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Opening my eyes, I look as his relaxed features, his lashes flutter just seconds before his eyes open to meet mine. I rephrase the question I asked earlier, changing the emphasis, "Prince, where are we going?"
He frowns, shaking his head. Either he's not understanding the gravity of my question, or he's avoiding it. I try another approach, "You need to talk to me, tell me what you want, where you want this to go. Right now, you're the only one that has moved forward, but you're not sharing where you're at. I just need a little direction."
He looks down, his free hand pulls a dandelion and studies it, he purses his lips, and sighs, "Letting people in is hard for me."
His other hand still in mine, I stroke my thumb over his, "It is for me, too, but I'm trying," I lift our hands, kissing his, "step outside your comfort zone just a bit, talk to me."
"What do you want me to say?"
"Anything, everything, whatever crosses your mind, as crazy as it might be, just share."
He tosses the dandelion into the grass watching where it lands, his eyes return to me, "I want happily ever after," he scoffs.
"That's a start," I say dryly at his attempt to be cynical. "And?"
He cocks his head and frowns when he sees I'm unbothered by how he said those words.
He turns thoughtful. "I thought I was done with all this," he picks another dandelion.
"With what?"
"Women, love," he pauses, "marriage, babies." My heart stops for a second, I watch as that dandelion gets tossed, too.
"Do you still want these things?" I lean over, trying to get a better look at his downcast face.
I get a nod, "I think so, I mean, yes. You wouldn't be here if I didn't." He's still looking down.
I let go of his hand and began stroking up and down his back in a comforting manner. I move closer, putting my head on his shoulder, I continue the caress..
Out of the blue, he asks, "Do you really love me?" as he strains to look at me in this position.
I lift my head, meeting his eyes, I change the words he just spoke to me, "I wouldn't be here if I didn't."
He pulls me into an embrace, and we sit in silence for a moment, we haven't shared a whole lot, but I know this is going to take some time.
"Prince, I never meant to hurt you, by...you know....screwing up on my pills. I'm so sorry for all the pain I caused."
"I told you not to blame yourself," he reminds me softly.
"I know." I sigh, "Did the miscarriage prompt that question back there with the doctor?"
He plucks another dandelion, "No. I always wanted a baby," he's spinning the weed between his fingers, watching it.
"You know, we're not spring chickens anymore. " I remind him.
"We're not even chickens," he tosses the dandelion at me. His tone is even, but his eyes flash with humor.
"Ha, ha! Wise guy!" I pluck a dandelion and toss it at him. "I guess we have a lot of thinking to do, huh?"
With this question he turns to me, his eyes sparkle and his expression is lit with hope.
"I said thinking," I emphasize the word.
He smiles with every bit of his face, "I heard you the first time," one eyebrow raises, "but, you didn't say 'no'."
