I fell in love twice / lee hongbin (#6)

♥30♥

Youngji

I sent the kids to bed and he was sitting in the living room looking at his phone. The birthday party had ended a long time ago and all the guests have returned home except for him.

I told him to stay behind, I have something to say to him. I have to say what I have to say.

I sat down next to him.

"How do the pictures turn out??" I asked him as he was the one who took all the photos at the birthday party earlier.

"It is much better than expected, I didn't take up photography for nothing."

"Thanks for attending, it was last minute but I'm glad that you came. Taewoon was smiling even in his sleep."

"Really?? I didn't do much though, I just turned up. That's all I did." He took a sip of the water he poured himself. "What is it that you have to say to me??"

I closed my eyes for a few seconds, mustering up my courage to tell what I have been trying to say to him all these times.

"I appreciate the feelings that you have for me but I think that we should continue to be friends."

"Youngji-ah..."

"I heard what you said that day. You like me, you have feelings for me but I can't accept you."

"Why?? You are now divorced and you can date anyone you like as you want. There are no restrictions."

"There is. I don't want to get hurt again, I don't want love to hurt me. I'm afraid."

He grabbed my hands. "Then I can help you with that, we can slowly build up our relationship."

I yanked his hands away. "No, it is not about the relationship. I just didn't want anyone to love me. I'm afraid of getting hurt again."

"Youngji-ah..."

"That's what I have to say. If you still want to be my friend, don't ever flirt with me."

"I'm not flirting, I really like you!!"

"I know, I'm just not prepared nor have the courage to love anyone again. Nam JiSoo had hurt me too much, I don't want you to hurt me as well."

His anger and frustration turned to sadness, he slowly got up from his seat.

"I got it. Friends are the best things in the world, don't you think so??" He said with a hint of sadness in his eyes.

I wanted to comfort him but what I said was right. The only way to not be together as a couple is to continue being friends.

"I see you next time, Heo Youngji." And he left.

I'm sorry, Lee HongBin. I'm such a bad person to break your heart.

Perhaps this is the best choice between the two of us, being friends forever with no hard feelings for each other.

------------

HongBin

I left the house and immediately went to the nearest bar that I can find.

All my feelings that I had for her came back into pieces.

She rejected me and I'm heartbroken. It hurts so bad, it truly hurts.

Why does rejection hurt so much?? Maybe it is because I am the one loving her...

All that hope that I had walking to her house knowing that she had something to delay to me was useless in the first place.

I should've never listened to those stupid love stories on the radio stations where they would share all their pieces of advice to singles like me.

How they met their love and fell in love with them, how they confessed to them and got accepted and started dating with each other as a result.

This is all a lie. If that person doesn't like you, she really doesn't.

She is still hanging on to the past, emotionally hurt by her ex-husband that physically abused her and cheated on her with her best friend. It is the worse combination that can lead to a divorce.

If only she wasn't married and single, this wouldn't happen. Everything would be different and I wouldn't be like this today. I met her at the wrong timing.

I sat down on the highchairs and ordered one strong glass of alcohol that would make me pass out instantly rather than to down glass after glass and crying at the same time.

The alcohol arrived at the right time and I picked it up, ready to drink it when......

"I didn't know that I would meet Dr. Lee right here at this time." I looked at the person next to me.

It was Dr. Jung Yoojin, my colleague at the hospital.

"Only depressed people would be here drinking at this timing, what's the matter with you??" She ordered a drink for herself as well.

"Nothing, I just wanted to drink outside than in my own house. Don't you have a conference to go with your father??"

Every year, the director of the various hospitals in Seoul will have a conference meeting to attend and of course as she is the daughter of the director, she has to attend.

"I did but I skipped out. I didn't want to be in an atmosphere where the old people are always talking about stuff that you will never understand, I wanted to be free so I escaped from it."

I nodded and decided to sip my glass of alcohol. Why drink it in one shot when you have a companion??

"Sometimes being the daughter of the director is hard, I can't have normal conversations with other doctors and nurses. You were the first that I have spoken to in 3 weeks. Thanks to my father, I got to meet you on your day off and the kid on the toy car."

That slap must have hurt so much.

"Sorry."

"Sorry for what??"

"For Taewoon, the child that I was taking care of."

"It's okay, didn't I said that I am fine with it already??"

"Even so, don't you feel hurt from him calling you a witch??"

"I am a witch."

Say what??

"I got into a relationship where the other party is already married, I was a mistress and I was called a witch as a result."

I didn't know how to respond to that so I just decided to look around the bar.

"HongBin ssi, do I look like a witch??" I looked at her who is now crying and her mascara is melting along with the tears.

"Emm... Yoojin ssi, rather than a witch, I just think that you are really a nice person."

If I stay here any minute, I don't know what she is going to do to me.

YeBin told me that in dramas, one night stands always happens like that if I gave in and shared her sorrows with her.

"I think that I better go now. See you--"

"Wait, stay behind for a while. I need your company for a while." 

But I don't need your company, I'm going home.

Before I can do anything, she pulled me into a kiss.

My first kiss was stolen by her and I seriously regret what I did later on.

I kissed her back.