Part 28 - 6th September 1969

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Lucy woke first, desperate for a trip to the bathroom. When she returned, Paul was still sound asleep. She glanced at the clock. It was almost 9 am so she decided to head downstairs and let Paul sleep. She threw her dressing gown on then stopped and collected Paul's dirty clothes from the previous evening. She wandered through to the kitchen to put some of the things in the washing machine. She stood undoing all the buttons on the shirt before washing it, knowing that Paul tended to lift his shirt over his head at the end of a long day. Suddenly she stopped and looked again at the collar.

"Lucy, is there something wrong?" Rose asked, coming into the kitchen. "Lucy?"

Lucy was stood, frozen to the spot. Rose tapped her lightly on her arm causing her to jump and spin round.

Rose took in her white, pinched face. "Lucy love, what's wrong?" she asked, greatly concerned.

Lucy handed the shirt to Rose, her hands shaking. "Look at the collar."

Rose did as Lucy asked. She stopped at a deep red smear near the front.

"Is that what I think it is?" Lucy whispered.

Rose rubbed it with her finger then sniffed it. "Oh Lucy," she exclaimed, "There must be some explanation! Paul wouldn't! Not now!"

"It's lipstick, isn't it?" Lucy demanded.

"Lucy love, it could have come from a fan or anything!"

Lucy shook her head. "I know who it is. The woman in the programme with him last night." She sat down suddenly. "How could he Rose? How could he?" She laughed bitterly, "You know what makes it worse?"

"Lucy love.."

"When Paul came home last night, he woke me so that we could make love! Three in the morning! After being with someone else." She stared at the table for a moment then stood up again. She picked up his jacket. "I might as well check this too. " She rummaged in his inside pocket. A few pieces of paper were screwed up inside it then Lucy felt something familiar. She pulled it out then burst into tears. "Why would he need this Rose? We don't need them do we? It's obvious he went out prepared!"

Rose took the little packet from her. "It's a sheath?" Rose looked at the sobbing Lucy and didn't know what to say. Why would Paul be carrying contraceptives in his pocket whilst Lucy was already pregnant? It didn't make sense!

"Rose, I need to go out. I need some space to think about what to do."

"Of course," Rose spoke softly, "What do you want me to tell Paul?"

"Whatever you want."

Lucy picked up her bag and slipped from the house. She needed to be alone to think. She debated where to go before settling on the quiet of the church. She went in and lit a candle as she always did before going into the side chapel where, even if someone else came in, she wouldn't be disturbed. Sitting in the cool silence immediately calmed her. Slowly her initial anger and hurt ebbed away, leaving her trying to understand why he would have done this to their relationship? It didn't make sense in many ways. She and Paul clearly loved each other, she didn't doubt that and their love making was more wonderful than it had ever been. Maybe he didn't find her as attractive now that she was getting fatter? Suddenly she felt angry again! Barely a month ago they had set the date for their wedding. She was carrying his baby and he'd begged her to take him back after everything that had happened in Scotland! Confused, hurt, let down and very scared, she closed her eyes and wondered how to deal with the situation. She sat for a long time, just taking time to reflect and think.

"LUCY!" She heard a familiar voice call, "Lucy love, are you here? Answer me!"

She debated whether to reply.

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