Get Up 10

Chapter 4 - Truth.

Ambrosine Brooks
Summer 2018

I sat at my vanity and blasted " Cranes in the Sky"

It's another hot summer day and all I wanted to do was get cute and get out this hell hole I call home. I was craving Starbucks. A day in the city sounded relaxing. We did the most random shit in the summer and no two days were the same. I lived for days like this because the rest of the year I found myself tired and working overtime in school trying to graduate with honors. I was doing everything to make sure my future was straight. Right now, I didn't see another way out other than getting a degree and building connections. I wasn't just after the money. I was also after freedom from Niche.

I have the privilege of not having any debt but that doesn't mean shit when you don't have any job lined up either. They say money is the root of evil but it's all on the person —what they choose to do it and how they act after getting money. I know that when I finally get a big girl salary I will stay humble.

I sat staring at myself after filling in my brows. I didn't like imperfections. I convinced myself that if my makeup was perfect then maybe it would mask my imperfections and hide how I felt on my worse days. Today wasn't horrible, but Niche was home from Miami and he was pissed about something.

I looked in the outdated vanity I had gotten as a teenager and it made me think about how I had to beg for this when I turned 16. Niche said that the only thing he'll ever pay for is school. Funny how he said that and I got a full ride.

He didn't want me to have much fun. On the ways that business went extremely well, he would attempt to be kind. Those days were rare. It wasn't because he wasn't t making money either. He just felt like every day should be a 500k day. Instead of raising me, he watched on as I raised myself over the years. He only provided the necessities of food, water, clothes and a roof. I did pretty good considering.

I was only able to get a decent bed room set because when I was in high school child protected services stopped by. There was this big thing happening where one of the school staff members saw my dad nearby selling to someone underage. There was no proof and the kid never ratted him out. It was embarrassing and the rumors didn't die down until someone popped up pregnant.

The woman from CPS stopped by one day and she was kind. I vividly remember her going through every inch of our home and telling him that he could do a better job with updating my room since I was no longer going to be comfortable on a twin sized bed. She was correct but I never complained because he is an aggressive man. He wasn't afraid to tell her off but he caught himself and it was the first time I seen him silenced. She was powerful and held a lot of power in her hand as she wrote down notes on a notepad. It is why I chose social work.

I know he didn't care about losing me but he did what she said anyways to stop the visits and prove a point. I've had the same room since then. There's a lot of pain and hard times that bounced off these four walls but my anxiety fades at the sound of my door locking.

I usually don't work during the school year but this internship is needed for me to graduate. That's is the only reason Niche didn't bitch about it.

Sadly, I can't enjoy my little coins like your average twenty something year old because my money will be going to my savings. I don't have room to spend it on clothes or makeup but that's okay. We'll get there one day though. Luckily, I have some timeless items already in my closet. Maybe I'll even sell them. Unfortunately, they came from a man I despise. Sometimes, I believe that these vintage items once belonged to my mom and that is the only reason I hold on to them.

The calming melodies and soothing voice of Solange Knowles calmed me up until I heard a loud slam. I assumed Niche had an attitude and was throwing things around so I just ignored it. He was usually pissed when things didn't go his way. It was like a child crying over a toy, except his toys were drugs and money.