Sent [Jenlisa]

Chapter 33

Lili's pov

Jennie and I are now in our room. She's sitting on the couch while I'm still standing at the door gaining confidence.

Can i say it right now to her? What if she reject me? Can she remember me if i say that i love her and I'm not dead. I pretended that I'm dead because it's the best for us? It's not a good reason. I need to gain my confidence but where is it? You're late confidence. Please hurry! This girl, the most beautiful girl I've seen, i can't lose her anymore. I really really love Jennie Kim with all of my heart. I will do everything for her, she's the one i wanted.

Lili: Uh. Nini? (scratching my head with my hand while the other is in my pocket)

-

Jennie's pov

I'm sitting on the couch and waiting for Lili to speak, she's standing at the door i don't know why.

Lili looks sad at the same time happy, i don't know what's in her mind. I really have this feeling that she's my ex girlfriend and i swear if i remember everything i will hug this girl tight and never let her go. I will love her as much as i love her before. Lili is trying to gain her confidence i think, what if she confess to me? What am i suppose to answer? When i first met her i feel safe and happy it's like the past is here but i can't really remember anything. I still have so many questions.

Lili: Uh. Nini?

Finally she spoke.

Jennie: What!?

What did i say? Aish..............

Lili: about earlier........

I look at her with furrowed brows.

Lili: I saw you and.....Taeyong

Oh yeah right! Taeyong is nice, he help me through a lot of stuff especially for my amnesia. He's always there for me when i need help or answers. He said the he loves me but............

Lili: He kissed you right? Why did he do that?

Lili looked down and moved her foot in circles

i don't love Taeyong as much as i do love my ex girlfriend and i really wish.............. It was........ you!

Jennie: Oh, that's...... he- (i took a deep breath) He told me that he loves me but i do-

Lili: did you say that you love him too?

Jennie: Uh.... i don't know what to say to say to him but i guess i love him........ but- (I stared to her blankly. What am i even saying? I'm hurting her!)

Lili removed her face mask and face me

Lili: oh!....... can i tell you the truth?

I don't know what to say because I'm lost of words.

Lili: Look at me nini (she said calmly)

I look at her and.... i felt my heart beat so fast, i fell for her just by looking at her eyes. I know that her eyes wants me to tell something and deep inside my heart the words i want to say is "i love you lili" i don't know why but my heart keeps on beating so fast and butterflies everywhere on my stomach.

Lili: I'm going to be honest with you, i know you don't love me anymore but- (Lili took a deep breath and she step forward. Now she's in front of me standing) I'm your ex girlfriend and-

I widen my eyes and slowly cover my mouth. What did she just say? She's my ex girlfriend? But wait Jisoo and Rośe said that she's dead. But why? Why now? Nevermind i just want to say that i love her so so much. But it's too late because i said that i love Taeyong but she didn't let me finish.

Lili: I know it's hard to accept and you can't remember me or everyone else but I'll promise you I'll explain what really happened. Just please forgive me (She fell down on the ground with her knees and start sobbing) I really really love you my nini but you love Taeyong now! (she's looking at the floor)

Those words......... Those words that made my heart beats faster, those words that made my eyes teary and those words that........ that sounds good to my ears that i wanted to hear for a long time ago.

Jennie: Wha- why?

Lili: I'm so selfish. And i doubt myself for loving you because i don't want to hurt you...

Jennie: But you did!

Yes she hurt me but that's all in the past. Gosh dang it! I don't know what to say anymore. Stupid mouth!

Lili: I'm...... I'm really really sorry! It's been a year since i followed you, and I'm here still following you. I don't care if you have amnesia or whatever. All i need is you!

I don't know what else to feel. I hug her tight like there's no tomorrow. She then hug me back, she caresses my hair with her hand then kissed me on my forehead. I feel like she's saying goodbye but i didn't mind it as long i am in her arms.

I felt the tears running to her face when she kissed my forehead. I know that i don't remember everything, i only dream about her but i feel that my heart remembers everything. I remember what the doctor said "Your mind can forget but your heart will always stay the same!" as i remember those words i closed my eyes to feel the hug. It calms my body, we are still sobbing while hugging. I don't really want to let go of her. I really love what we are doing right now.

-

Lili's pov

I.......i really really love this girl that I'm hugging but she can't never love me back because she have Taeyong now. It hurts, it's like 1000 nails are in my heart crashing it pieces by pieces.

I let go of the hug and put my hands on her cheeks wiping her tears and kissing her forehead.

I don't want to leave but i don't want her to suffer. I don't want to see Jennie with Taeyong and i don't want to feel the pain before. I want to know myself more. I really really need to do this by my own.

I'm so sorry nini but i really need to go. I love you Jennie Kim. I just............ i just need some time to think and you also need to think, you don't even remember anything about me and now you have Taeyong. I hope you find answers to your questions and i hope I'll find mine too.

As for the last time, i kissed her forehead for a long time and i closed my crying eyes.

Bye, nini.

-

A/N

🙊🙈

(what is happening? mag soul search si lisa? ahhahahahaha)