Brendon Urie Imagines and Smuts

I want to, but we can't (Fluff)

Y/N POV:

I'm in love. I know that sounds dramatic and people may think I'm just young and naive, but I really think I'm in love. Every time I'm in the same room as him, I get butterflies in my stomach and my heart immediately starts beating faster. When he talks to me, I can't help but stare into his brown eyes, getting lost in them. When he smiles, I can't help but smile too, it's infectious. His name is Brendon Urie. It wasn't meant to happen, but we started spending more and more time together, so we started getting feelings for each other. There had been tension between us for a long time, before I finally confessed that I was falling for him. At first, I didn't think it was mutual but as I said those words, he crumbled and told me he felt the same.

I've been on tour with Panic for the last couple of weeks and it's been the best experience of my life. Not only do I get to visit more places, going exploring to get some good snaps for Instagram. But, I get to spend time with Brendon and the guys. Sadly, Brendon and I can't be as open as we'd like to be, because Zack is my Dad. He's a very protective Dad and would kill the both of us if he ever found out. It's not the age difference that would bother him, it'd be the fact that he works with Brendon and he just wouldn't understand. Like I said, I didn't intend for it to happen but Brendon was always so nice and actually noticed me, taking time to talk to me when nobody else did. 

"Hey you, are you okay?" Brendon says, plopping himself down next to me on the bus. I fight the urge to lean over and kiss him. But we're on the move and Kenny and Nicole are opposite us.

"I'm good actually, you?" I say, making direct eye contact with him. I feel all the tension in my body melt as I gaze into those eyes. He holds my gaze for a few seconds, before turning away so as not to arouse suspicion.

"I'm excited for today, we can all explore the Grand Canyon" Brendon exclaims, his face lighting up. Under the table, his hand lightly touches mine and I feel sparks through my body. I feel my face blush, so I flick my hair over my face to hide it from the others.

"I've never been to the Grand Canyon, so I'm really excited" Nicole says, looking up from her phone. Kenny and Brendon tell her about the last time they saw it, which provides a distraction from my red face.

"Excuse me, I think I'm going to go for a lie down, we'll be doing a lot of walking later" I explain, scooting past Brendon before heading to the room at the back. Because I'm the youngest, the guys let me have the proper 'bedroom' at the back of the bus. It's quite small, but it beats a bunk so I'm not complaining. Honestly, I don't want a lie down, it's just getting harder and harder to be around Brendon.

I lay on the bed, scrolling through instagram when my door opens. It's Brendon.

"Somehow I didn't think you were going for a nap" He laughs, perching on the end of the bed. I giggled and sit up, placing my phone on the bedside table.

"I just had to be alone for awhile, I hate this Brendon." My voice cracking and weirdly, I feel tears in my eyes.

"I know you do and so do I. But, we both know why we can't be open about it, not yet anyway. It's killing me not being able to just hold your hand or kiss you good morning. I promise I'll work something out but right now, we have to hide our feelings. I want to tell people, but we can't" He says, pressing his forehead against mine.

A cough comes from the door, "We're just pulling up now." My Dad says and we both jump apart.

"Do you think he saw?" I whisper, suddenly feeling overwhelmed with panic.

"I don't know, I hope not" Brendon replies, looking worried. He jumps off the bed and heads to his bunk, to gather up his stuff. I scramble around to pack my rucksack, unable to stop thinking about whether my Dad saw us or not.

As I walk off of the bus, Dad refuses to make eye contact with him, confirming my fears. He saw us and he's not happy about it. Suddenly, I'm not in the mood for the Grand Canyon anymore, so I excuse myself and head back to the bus. 

I throw myself onto the bed, burying my head in the pillow and I begin to cry. I'm crying so loud that I don't even hear Brendon come in.

"Y/N, what's wrong?" He asks, sitting next to me, stroking my hair. Slowly, I turn round and he gazes into my eyes, searching for an answer.

"He knows, Brendon. He wouldn't even look at me. Why is it so wrong for us to be together?" I stutter, my tears making my breathing go funny. 

"It's not exactly wrong, he's obviously just shocked. Look, I really like you. Obviously I care what your Dad thinks, but I really think we could be something" Brendon says, lifting my chin lightly with his hand. He leans in slowly and places his plump lips on mine. The kiss is gentle, but it's still enough to send sparks through my body. After a few moments, we both pull away and he pulls me into his arms.

"We'll talk to your Dad, explain it all to him" He whispers, rubbing circles into my back.

"No need, I think I know what's been going on" My Dad says, standing in the doorway. I go to pull apart, but Brendon takes hold of my hand and gives me a stern look.

"Zack look, I know this is your little girl and you want to protect her. I promise you, neither of us intended this to happen. But, you can't help who you fall for, right? I really like her and I would never hurt her, I promise" Brendon explains, a serious tone in his voice and he doesn't break eye contact with my Dad.

"I must admit, it is a little strange but I'm not completely against it. I just don't want her feelings to be hurt, not just by you, it'd be the same if it was any guy" Dad explains.

"I know and it's because you're a great Dad, you care. But, I'm not that little anymore and I know what I'm doing. I really like Brendon and I want to be more open about us, hiding it is killing me. I'm sorry you found out like this, I really am" I say, silent tears rolling down my cheeks.

"Don't apologise, like Brendon said, you can't help who you fall for. Don't you dare hurt her, Urie." Dad says, glaring at him. But his face soon breaks into a smile and I let out a huge sigh of relief. He turns round and heads back into the main part of the bus.

"Thank you" I whisper, feeling Brendon's breath on my face. I lean in and kiss him, not as gently this time. We move in rhythm with each other, his hands making their way to my hair. I pull away breathlessly, as I hear everybody else coming back onto the bus.

"Now, we can tell them" I say, reaching my hand out to Brendon and he clasps his in mine. No more hiding.