Brendon Urie Imagines and Smuts

This Kinda Hurts (Fluff)

Y/N POV:

"Y/N, I need you to conduct an interview. We've managed to get an exclusive but Kayleigh has called off sick, can you do it?" My boss says, running over to my desk, an anxious look on her face.

"Uhh, I'm not the best at interviews but if you're desperate, then sure. Who am I interviewing? I ask, swivelling my chair to face her.

"We have managed to secure an interview with none other than Brendon Urie!" She squeals, clapping her hands excitedly. My face immediately drops and I'm filled with an overwhelming sense of dread.

"Are you sure there's nobody else who can do it? What about the intern? I'm sure if you wrote down a list of questions he'd be fine" I say desperately, trying to worm my way out of this.

"Why? Ever since I mentioned it was Brendon you've changed, what's wrong?" She eyes me up cautiously.

"Let's just say that Brendon and I have a bit of history..." I begin and I see her face perk up.

"Perfect! This will be the juiciest interview yet! He'll be here in ten, good luck!" She exclaims before walking off to load another job on somebody else. 

I groan and place my head in my hands. Out of all the people I could interview, why does it have to be him? Brendon and I dated for a few years, it was all going really well. We had talked about moving in together, to take our relationship to the next level. He promised that as soon as he was back from tour, we would start house hunting. I never saw him after that conversation, all I got was one text saying he didn't want to be with me anymore. He mailed all the clothes and stuff that I'd left at his, just so he wouldn't have to see me in person. 

"Y/N? Brendon's here" The intern, Michael says. I flash him a smile and say thank you. I run over to the nearest mirror, making sure I don't look like a hot mess. I practise my best fake smile and then head down to the lobby to get Brendon.

"Brendon?" I say. He's sitting with my back to me. He turns round, a beaming smile on his face but as he takes in more of me, his smile fades and his face pales. 

"Um hi" He says and Zack looks at him confused, obviously not recognising me.

"Long time no see, shall we head up and get this over and done with?" I ask in my best professional voice while making it obvious to him that it wasn't my idea to do the interview.

As we get settled in the room, Brendon shuffles around in his seat awkwardly. His eyes keep darting towards the door, obviously willing the time away so that he can make a swift exit.

"Okay, I think we're ready to start" I say, once I see that the cameras are rolling.

"So Brendon, thank you for sitting down with us today. How are you finding this tour so far?" I ask, leaning forward slightly, pretending to be fully interested in his answer.

"It's going great, probably one of the best so far. The fans have really blown us away by carrying on with the hearts project" He replies. I have to give him his due, he is acting like this totally isn't awkward at all.

"That leads me nicely to my next question. Is it true the hearts project inspired you to set up your own foundation?"

"Yeah, seeing everyone pull together really made me think about what more I could be doing. So, that's why I set up the Highest Hopes foundation. It's a really important cause for me, I just want to give back whatever I can"

"That's really good of you, I wish you the best of luck with that."

We discuss various topics including his inspiration for Pray For The Wicked, upcoming projects and of course his stint in Kinky Boots. I try to keep it as professional as I can, especially when he mentions his new love interest.

"I think having a supportive partner has kept me motivated to keep releasing music. She really is amazing and if it wasn't for her, I probably would have stopped after the last album. I thought I had nothing more to give but she managed to convince me to carry on" He says, a smile settling on his face.

I feel a pang of sadness as he speaks. That should be me he's talking about. It would have been me, if he hadn't abandoned me after his tour. He never explained why, I've spent all these years wondering what I did wrong, what I could have done differently. It hurts that he's moved on and I've been too afraid to, because I'm scared the same thing will happen.

"Well, thank you again Brendon, it's been lovely to talk to you. Make sure to check out Pray For The Wicked if you haven't already" I say, directing the last part towards the camera. 

As I pack my things away, I'm shocked that Brendon hasn't darted for the door. He stays sat in his seat, still awkwardly shuffling about.

"You know you can leave, we're all done here" I say, not bothering to look at him.

"Can we talk?" He asks, his voice quiet. I take a deep breath. All I want is to go home, curl up on the sofa and pretend like today never happened (mood). 

"I'm really not in the mood Brendon. Why didn't we 'talk' all those years ago? Why did you settle for a text message? Do you have any idea how much that hurt?" I ask, raising my voice as tears threaten to spill down my face.

"I know. It was wrong and if I could do it differently, I would. There isn't a word strong enough to describe how shitty I was to you. You deserved better and I'm sorry" He says, walking over to me, lightly placing his hand on my arm. I surprise myself in that I don't shrug him off.

"I just wanted an explanation, I think I was owed that. You let me overthink it all. I was just getting over it and then I got this interview sprung on me today. You didn't have to say all that about your new partner, rubbing it in my face. That should be me you're talking about and you know it" I lower my head as a few tears roll down my cheeks. He tilts my head up gently with his hand and wipes the tears away.

"You're right, it should be you. But, I messed that up. Truth is, you didn't do anything, it was all me. I just didn't realise that I had everything I could have wanted. I shouldn't have said all that today, that was wrong and I'm sorry. I'm just so sorry, Y/N" He wraps his arms round me and at first, I don't hug back but God, I've missed his warmth. My arms envelope him and we stay there, just holding each other. 

"Thank you. You didn't have to say all that today but it means a lot that you did. I've been scared to move on, I was worried there was something wrong with me" I explain, wiping some more tears from my face.

"Babe, it was never you. You were perfect and whoever is lucky enough to be in a relationship with you better treat you better, or they'll have me to answer to" He says and I laugh. Suddenly, things feel like they did all those years ago, when we were each other's best friend.

Wow, I completely winged this chapter. I made it up as I went along but slowly starting to like some new ideas, just bare with me x