Twin Grier

48

claire;

i wake up a little later, feeling someone behind me. i turn my head to see its taylor. what the fuck i think. i get up slowly, my feet about to touch the floor when he speaks up. "you thought i was a sleep?"

"umm... yeah. what're you doing here?" i ask, feeling embarrassed for getting caught. "well i was supposed to get in yesterday for thanksgiving but my flight got delayed. so did all the other guys too except cameron's." he says.

"all the guys are here? wow, that must've been a long nap." i mutter. he laughs, sitting next to me. "so why didn't you say anything?" he asks. i look at him confused.

"i heard you're starving yourself." he says. i immediately look down, my face red. "claire how could you do that to yourself? you're fucking beautiful. inside and out. no matter what anyone says, you are." he takes my hand.

"i just don't understand why you didn't say anything. i thought we were friends." he says softly. i don't know what to say, letting him keep talking instead.

"i look at you and all i see is a kind, beautiful girl who just wants to be happy. so worry less about what you look like and worry more about yourself. it's important to love yourself just as you are." he says.

he wipes away my tears, hugging me. after letting go, he leaves me alone. i lay back on my bed, staring up at the ceiling.

"claire!" i hear mallory yell. i sit up quickly, seeing her run in, tackling me with a hug. we fall back on my bed, as i laugh.

she gets up afterwards, as i notice she's crying. "why're you crying?" i ask as she sits down. "well, you know. someone was cutting onions." she jokes.

we chuckle. "it's just that i never noticed that you were skipping meals." she says. "how do you know that?" i ask. "claire, does it matter? i feel so sad that you couldn't come to me, your best friend, for help."

"correction. one of your best friends." tyler walks in sitting down. mallory rolls her eyes as callie, lulu, haley, charlie & sean all sit around me as well.

"and hayes told us. since he's the only one you told. i can see why though but we could've helped you. right guys?" callie assures and everyone agrees nodding their heads.

"but what matters is we're here now and we'll help you. because i love you." tyler side hugs me. "dude that ain't fair i was gonna say that." sean complains making everyone laugh.

"i'm really sorry i didn't tell you guys. at first, it was just a stupid mistake but i made it worse by cutting you guys off and i wish i could go back and do it all over again." i say.

"you don't have to explain anything to us. you just need to focus on getting better and being happy. okay?" haley holds my hand. i smile sadly at her saying, "i love you. and all of you guys too."

we do a group hug, some of us crying. mostly me, haley and lulu. but where's wes?

next day ☮️

i spent the rest of the day yesterday just in my room, taking naps and talking to my friends in the group chat after they left.

i wanted to ask so badly about wes but i didn't really want him finding out about it. but i thought maybe he knows and doesn't wanna face me.

i woke up around noon, confused as to why mom let me sleep in since today is thursday and there's school. i go downstairs to the kitchen ironically, seeing a note on the fridge.

hayes & nash went to school. they wanted to let you stay home today and i agree. i went to go run some errands. please eat something. not just a granola bar. you know how to make pancakes.
- mom ❤️

i sigh, sitting on the stool. "honey i'm home!" someone shouts. i jump, seeing all the guys holding mc donald's bag. oh yeah i think i forgot they were here.

"pancakes for you claire. nash told me to get them." cam places it in front of me. taylor sits next to me, getting out his food from the bag. he squeezes my shoulder as a sign that he's there for me.

matt sits opposite of taylor, next to me, bringing me in for a tight hug not saying anything. "okay i cant breathe." i say. he chuckles letting go.

everyone starts eating and i'm still sitting there just staring at my food. finally, i grab my fork and knife and slowly start to eat as well, savoring the flavor of the maple syrup and pancakes.

later 🐋

i sit at the desk in my room, doing homework for spanish class that i didn't do yesterday because of everything that happened. "hey honey." mom walks in.

i turn around saying, "hey." she sits on one of the small chairs at the end of my bed, with some papers in her hand. "so about what i wanted to talk more with you yesterday."

"is it bad?" i ask. "i'll let you be the judge of that. the doctor told me that you need to start seeing a psychologist." she says.

"i don't need a psychologist." i groan. "well it's doctors orders so you don't really have a say. and you have to meet with them twice a week." she says.

twice a week? "that's a little unnecessary, don't you think mom?" i say. "well you stopped eating to the point of starvation so no, i don't think it is." she snaps.

i go quiet, as she sighs. "i already made an appointment. monday at 9:30." she says. "and did you eat breakfast or brunch?" she asks.

"the guys brought mc donald's. first time in forever that i've ate that." i say. "well i hope it was good. anyways, i gotta start on dinner." she gets up, walking out.

my phone beeps and i pick it up seeing a text from mandy with a photo attached.

mandy 🌈: missing u at rehearsal. where r u ??

ever since i found out she did ballet, i feel like we've gotten closer. it's what we have in common and we both like to dance in general & also the fact that she helped me with the whole wes/scarlett thing.

me: flu. i don't think i'll be able to learn all the new choreography by the time i'm better. i might not be in the show ):

mandy 🌈: bummer !! that sucks. wish it wasn't like that. you would've made a great odette (:

me: awww. i don't really know.
but you'll be a great odile. have fun !!!!!

i really wish i could've been able to dance in the show. i don't know how i'm going to tell her that it's not just the show i'll be missing out on.

———————
poor claire. but at least now she's getting the help she needs to get better (: - ash 💩
6/13/18