Almost Is Never Enough // Beddy Spin-Off

28

5 SecondsofSummerhavesomanyfans now. What the actual fuck?! They are so successful now and brb, jumping off a bridge. Not edited.

xBreHoran

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/28/

The way people approached me was the worst. Everyone just looked at me and treated me like a thin sheet of paper; one tug and I'll rip.

I hated that.

Fucking Christmas is in three days and I haven't had a normal conversation with anyone since Joey's funeral. It's like everyone's avoiding me, and that fucking sucks. I actually like people...or at least the ones I'm close with. My own bloody daughters won't talk to me. God, this sucks.

I had the house to myself so I sat in office room, door locked, and I wrapped up Christmas presents while drinking some Yellowstone beer. I don't usually drink unless there's an occasion. Does depression count as an occasion? I think so. Ugh. Being Santa Clause sucks ass. Why am I so whiny today? Fuck my life.

I need to take a piss.

I stood and wobbled, gripping onto the edge of the desk. Holy shit, I'm drunk. I groaned and trudged my way to the bathroom in Blair and I's room. I don't even know why I came all the way down the hall. Why do I still have this beer in my hand? I stopped in front of the mirror and snorted at myself. I look like complete shite. No wonder people don't talk to me.

I glanced down to the counter top and there was a note and my medication. Antidepressants and anti-tipsycotics. I picked the note up and squinted at it, the beer blurring the words. All I could make out of it was: Edward, leaving, kids, Blair.

Blair's leaving me? Wait! What? When the fuck did this happen?! Fuck. Fuck! FUCK! I grabbed the bottles of pills and flipped the caps off both of them, taking two of each like I'm supposed to. I grabbed my beer and downed them with that before walking back down the hall. Now I really have nothing. Have I really fucked up that bad?

My vision got even more blurry as I made my way downstairs where someone was pounding on the door. I dropped the glass, letting it shatter on the floor everywhere.

''Shit.'' I mumbled as the knocking turned into pounding. I bumped into the chin case before falling. The case falling as well.

/Blair's POV/

"- and yeah, that's how Edward and I are spending our anniversary." I gushed to the girls. 

"That's so cute Blair. And just think, you'd already have the babies so you and Edward can totally have -" 

"Yazmin, shut up." 

"But really! And since you lot are going to Cancun, Mexico, it'll be all hot and exotic and -" 

"Yazmin, shut the fuck up." I laughed. The girls wanted to go to the cafe' downtown for breakfast, so I dropped Aliby and Harmony off at my parents' place and went there. 

It's been a couple days since Joey's funeral and I don't think anyone has properly talked to Edward since then. We didn't want to pester him to much because this was a major loss for him. I do plan on talking to him today though. I just want to see where he stands with everything and everyone. 

''Blair, hello?''

I looked back up at the girls and shook my head with a smile. ''Sorry guys. I was just thinking about something.''

''You were thinking about Edward, weren't you?'' Whitney asked.

I nodded with a sad smile. ''I just don't want him to hurt himself. Edward's very unpredictable and,'' I started to choke up, wiping tears from under my eyes, ''I love him so much. He's my baby, and I just don't want him to hurt himself. Gosh, I'm getting emotional.''

''Blair, you need to start telling him how you feel instead of bottling all of this in. It's not healthy,'' said Britney.

''I know,'' I sniffled, ''it's just a little bit harder when your husband can easily get mad at nothing.''

''Blair?''

I turned and there stood Madeline. I sent her a smile, but she kept a concerned look on her face.

''Hey Madeline. I haven't heard from you in a while.''

''Yeah. Sorry. I was visiting my mam in Ireland. I heard about what happened and I just wanna say sorry for your loss.'' she stated, a soft smile on her lips.

''Thanks.'' I mutter while the other girls store daggers into her. They didn't like her and I think its because of that whole affair thing, but that was my fault. I was just speaking attention for some reason. Probably a mid-life crisis thing.

''Are you okay? Did I say something? I can leave.'' she said.

''Oh no. You didn't do anything. Can you drive me home? Please? I drove here though.''

''Yeah, sure. I took to tube so it's fine. Here, let me help you up.''

She placed her cuppa on the table and wrapped her arms gently around me, hauling me up. She kept her arm around me so I could steady myself. I handed her my keys and sent the girls a smile.

''I'll talk to you lot later.'' I said.

''Yeah. Call me later after your chat.'' said Jillian. I just nodded and walked out the shop with Madeline. She helped me into my car and quickly walked to the other side, ignoring reporters.

When we were half way there, I placed my hand on top of hers, that was on the armrest and said, ''you're such a great friend for someone who loves my husband.''

She blushed, ''oh thank you, but I'm sure I'm pretty much over Edward.''

''That's good. That's good.'' I said softly, closing my eyes, sighing.

''You want me to help you in.'' Madeline asked. I opened my eyes and realised that were were in the yard.

''Oh no. It's fine. You've done enough.'' I smiled at her. I'm so exhausted.

''Really, I don't mind. I have nothing to do today at all. Blair, I know you and Edward are having problems. He calls me sometimes at the wee hours of the morning and tells me.''

''I didn't know you two still talked.'' I said tensing up.

''Not like that Blair. I can promise that.'' she said smiling softly. ''Let's just say I've switched lanes for the time being.''

''Switched la–oh.'' So she's gay now? Didn't see that coming.

''Just trying something new. While I'm young at least.'' she said.

''I hear that.'' I mumbled. ''Now c'mon. Get your ass over here and help me out the car.''

She laughed and got out, quickly helping me out. We trudged through the falling and already fallen snow up to the front door. Madeline used my key to open the door and as soon as I stepped past the foyer I screamed. 

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Blah blah blah, I'm updating again. 

xBreHoran