Chapter 44

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"Kiera, wake up. "I blinked open my eyes when I heard a voice just as gentle as a voice of a mother waking her child. It didn't take long to recognize the person besides my bed.

"........ What time is it? "I pulled myself up, still feeling sleepy. He chuckled as he watched, that's when I noticed that I'm drooling all over my pillow. I blushed out of embarrassment.

"It's the dark hour, Fuuka is already searching for the shadow. Mitsuru wanted me to check on you. Do you think you can join us? "He asked as he gently patted my head with a soft smile. I'm pretty surprised to hear that.

"I thought she wouldn't let me, I mean, I'm in quite a terrible state earlier today. "I tilted my head a bit, feeling confused.

"She said that as long as you don't push yourself, it's fine. "I paused when I heard that. Something's not right. Suddenly, I noticed that the drawer where I kept my drugs have signs of being opened. Did they.........

I remained quiet for a while, then I sighed as I opened my drawer. Aki gasped when I did that, I was right.

"Figures, I knew when you're being a bit too tolerate. "I said as I took out a few containers. I stared at them for a while before I toss all of them into the trash can, Aki was surprised by my actions.

"How much do you know? "I turned towards him and forced out a smile. He avoided my gaze, being hesitant before he finally spoke.

"........ How much you depend on the drugs to make sure you're at the same pace as us and.........that you're quitting SEES after this operation. "He looked away, being guilty.

"Shinji, you promise not to say anything. "I sighed. But, at least he didn't tell them that I'm dying.

"Kiera......... I know you might not want to talk about it......... But why the drugs? "He questioned with a concerned look on his face. I recognize that look, it's the 'I wish you would depend more on me' look. I stared at him for a moment before resting my head on his shoulder, he was startled but he didn't move.

"Sorry, I know that it's wrong, but I don't have another choice. The dark hour, Tartarus and even just a normal day in school, I can't really keep that up anymore. Don't worry, I won't take them anymore, I no longer need them. "I confessed as I cuddled with him. I love the fact that his presence alone makes me calm enough, to be honest.

"Kiera, you don't have to quit SEES just because you're not strong enough. Whether you help in battles of not, you're still an important part of our team. SEES won't be the same without you. "He said to me. I bit onto my lips. I know that..........that's why I.......

"Sorry, but this is my decision. I've already thought about it. "I said as I got up.

"But, Kiera........ "

"Sorry, but can you leave the room for now? I need to change. I may not be able to join the front lines anymore, but I still want to see it to the end. "I gave him a wryly smile as I cut him off. He didn't know what to say at that moment, so he simply just nods and left the room with a pained look on his face. It hurts to see it, but I have no other choice. Sorry, Aki.

"Kiera, you made it! "Yukari seems happy to see me enter the command room with Aki. Judging from the tense atmosphere, they knew.

"Well, I can't miss my last operation now, can't I? "I smiled as I tried to lighten the mood. But, of course, it backfired. Yet, they are willing to let it slide as they need to concentrate on the mission which I'm really grateful for it.

"Where's Shinji and Ken? "I asked as they don't seem to be in the room.

"Shinjirou-sempai said that he would join us later while Ken-kun is currently nowhere to be found. But, I'm sure they will show up eventually. Unlike somebody. "Yukari said as she glared at Junpei.

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