Chapter 63

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No! Bad girl, bad.

But I want cookies.

It's almost dinner time!

Oni-chan.......

....... Fine, only one okay? ******?

When was the last time I heard him call me by that name? ......... That's right, when he collapsed beside me on October 4th.

My name......... The name my real mother gave to me.......... The name I grew to hate........... And the name I grew to love.......... Why..........did I threw it away again?

It's dark and cold here. Perhaps it's due to the eyes that glued themselves together, blocking out every last light I had in here. Body's heavy.........yet light at the same time, like I was floating in mid air yet too tired to make a single move. It's quiet here, too quiet actually, nothing but dead silence.........

Is this what death feels like? Or perhaps this is the afterlife? It doesn't feel as peaceful and gentle like Heavens nor it's horrifying like Hell........ Simply just........ Emptiness.......like a void. The voices in my head soon began to speak, I'm.........no longer sure whose voice it is anymore.

Are you really sure that you want to end it like this?

Who's there? .......... But, I guess it doesn't matter anymore, I'm.......tired.

Don't you have any regrets?

........ I have but what's the point now?

What about the people you want to protect? If you leave like this, they'll suffer a great dealt of mental scars.

I know......... But what choice do I have?

Are you really sure of this?

Yes........

Stop lying.

...........not even been in here for a day and I already starting to talk with the voice in my head.

Don't you know who I am?

....... Fine, who are you?

I'm........ You. And you're me.

Yep, I'm crazy.

Just think of me as your other self.

My.........other self?

I know everything about you. But, unfortunately you don't......... After all, I'm the part of you that you reject so much off.

..........

You're tired of lying, yet it has became a habit of yours to insert at least one lie in every of your words. You reject the kindness and love given to you, because you're afraid of the consequences when you loses them. You burden yourself with everything, because you didn't want people to reject you if you don't. You're nothing but a coward who runs from your problems. You ran from your fate, your friends, your family, your responsibilities and even your own life.

....... Well, thanks a lot. Like I didn't know that already.

Are you sure about that?

........

I'm nothing but a being you created with your strong desire to protect those precious to you. The unspoken desire to stay by their side and the resolve to maintain that in all means. You blame that to selfishness, but is it really selfish to wish to be loved? You lied day and night, but in the end, you're just too scared to show your true self to anyone.

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