Beautiful, Loved and Blessed

Let The Show Begin!

As I reached the bottom of the stairs, I immediately headed into the kitchen where I knew no one would see me, and silently cried.

I was angry, regretful, embarrassed and scared. Not only did I cross the line and violently lose my temper, but I became fearful of my own self. If my Godfather's voice hadn't stopped me in my tracks, I would've really hurt Kirk because I was literally on the verge of blacking out on his ass.

Him telling me that boldfaced lie sent me over the edge, especially after knowing that Celeste lied to me as well. It made me realize that the only person looking out for me was myself. Neither one of them was on the side of right, they were on the side of where their bread was buttered.

They knew that Prince was in his office "meeting" with another woman, and for some reason was going to great lengths to hide it from me. I just couldn't understand it and since falling in love with Prince, it was the first time his actions made me feel isolated and alone.

As I wiped my tears, I turned around to look for some tissue and gasped at the sight before me.

"Mr. Ray you scared me!" I jumped.

"My apologies but I was in the larger kitchen and heard someone; I had no idea it was you. Is everything okay?"

"Yes, I was just getting some tissue." I lowly said as I quickly grabbed a paper towel.

Ray stood there and gave me a half smile. "I think this will be a little softer." He said handing me a Kleenex.

"Thank you." I sniffed.

"Are you sure everything is okay Ms. Devareaux?  Did someone upset you? Would you like for me to ask Celeste to get Prince?"

"No sir, I'm fine. Let me get out of your way because I know you're busy and I need to give Preston a good luck kiss, as well as get me a good seat." I half smiled trying to convince Ray that nothing was wrong.

However, the look on Ray's face let me know that he wasn't buying it. Not ready for more questioning, I turned around to leave.

Ray then gently grabbed my arm. "I think you should use the mirror in the nearby restroom to freshen up first."

I gave Ray a curious look.

"Your eyes are a bit red and I wouldn't want Preston asking you any questions." He kindly explained.

"Thank you." I gracefully patted Ray's arm.

As I entered the nearby restroom and looked in the mirror, I was really grateful for Ray. Not only were my eyes red, but I also appeared to be slightly unhinged as my hair was now a bit disheveled. I had styled it with a deep side part and loose wavy curls that cascaded down my back while beautifully framing my face.

I remembered Prince once asked me why I never wore my hair out, so I wanted to surprise him by doing so tonight. I now thought about just how silly I was, by being giddy for a man who wouldn't even open his office door for me.

"I'm so fucking stupid!" I said aloud to myself as another tear trickled down my cheek.

We're supposed to be leaving for our trip tomorrow, and I thought that tonight would be a wonderful precursor to our first holiday vacation. I had envisioned that after the recital, Prince would spend the night with Preston and I having a nice dinner while reminiscing about the event.  Being that he loved my lasagna so much, I had even made some Spaghetti and homemade garlic bread.

Too bad that wouldn't be happening now. With Uncle Hakeem in town, it was no way he would allow Prince to step a foot inside my house tonight.  After the way he saw me act over Prince, I know he will want to have a long conversation with me.