Swan Lake || Luke Hemmings AU

27. Never Again

(c) - Isobel (@BellaVanella)

For the 1st time, I considered this camp a prison. No places I can be alone in. The cottage wasn't an option. He would find me there. It wasn't a good idea. I didn't want to be around him, so I went to the only place I could think of. The infirmary.

"Hey Jane!" Olivia beamed as I approached. "I haven't seen you in forever. How are..." She trailed off when she saw my face. "Oh my," she gasped, pulling me in for a hug. "What's wrong?" I just shook my head and kept crying.

"H-he cheated on me," I croaked. Olivia frowned and rubbed my back. "Janey," she whispered. "I'm so sorry to hear that." I just kept crying and telling her about what I just witnessed a while ago. "It hurts so much," I concluded. "My heart is breaking. I thought he loved me.."

Olivia didn't say anything. She just kept on hugging me and rubbing my back. It was supposed to feel comforting but I guess I was clouded with so much pain. Luke, was all I thought about. Luke, Luke, Luke, and my mind was giving me a vision of him and Susan. I let out a scream and cried harder.

There was a knock on the door which caused Olivia to pull away from me. "Stay here," she said. "I'll tell the person to leave and then I'll let you get some rest, okay?" I nodded as she stood up and left.

I did a little, sad reflection on my life. Yes, all throughout, people have hurt me. It's the very reason why I was cutting and starving myself in the first place. I thought that maybe if I looked good, I'd be good enough for them. That's what lead me to rehabilitation in the 1st place and how I ended up here.

When I got to this camp, I thought it was crap, but the more I stayed, the more I realized that it was worth it. People like George, Elle, Michael, Luke... I thought I would be accepted at last. I never thought this day would come.

Luke and Susan. Susan and Luke. I guess I wasn't enough for him after all. I wasn't everything he wanted, I wasn't everything he needed. I was just me, and it killed me to know that it wasn't enough for him.

"Jane," I turned to see Olivia approaching but she was alone. She was with the last person I'd expect to see. George. "Jane," he let out. I started crying once again.

I lost my Best Friend and now, I lost my boyfriend. I have no one else. Of course it was too good to be true, why would someone choose to stay with me when there's something, or someone, better out there? All throughout the summer, I was fooling myself that this was the start of something new for me.

George slowly approached me, sitting beside me, on the bed. It took me by surprise when he hugged me tight. But grief immediately overtook and I cried and cried and cried. I didn't know what else I would do so I just cried.

"I know you guys have some unresolved issues so," Olivia stated. "Do you want to talk alone?" George nodded. "That would be nice," he said. "Thank you, Olivia."

Olivia left us and went to her desk. I managed to calm down a little and I looked up at George with my puffy, red eyes. George gave me a sad smile and he wiped away some tears that were still in my cheeks.

"You know," he spoke up. "People say that crying is for the weak but fuck that, you know? Sometimes, we need to cry because we've been holding so much shit for so long. So Jane, cry all you want. I'll be here and I'll make sure everything's okay."

I shook my head. "I just thought that he really did love me..." I mumbled. "I guess I wasn't good enough, right? I didn't have sex with him that night, but we did the night before and the night after. I guess that wasn't good enough for him. That's why he slept with Susan, right? I'm so pathetic."