run over - ruel vandijk

• falling in love •

y/n's pov:

i had been in the bathroom for nearly the whole recess. i was alone, like always, but it felt okay i guess.
i was in a stall listing to some music.
sam decided to call me during my favourite song.
of course he would.

owen has recently got me a sim card for my phone, he still told me not to get social media because he was anxious for me about the foster parents finding me.
i could blame him, i was hella scared too.

i pick up the phone.

"hey."

"hi, y/n?"

i smile, i slid my phone number in his locker before i went in the bathroom.

"okay cool, so what's up?" he asks

"nothing much." i reply.

"where are you?"

"the bathroom..."

he pauses for a second, "okay."

i make sure no one is in the bathroom before i say to sam what i've been meaning to tell him all day, "okay, sam, listen, no one knows about me. no one knows that i live alone, no one knows about my past, except you okay, please don't tell anyone."

"really? no one knows?" he sounds surprised.

"well, yeah, you're my only friend -and i don't want to make any more friends so please don't introduce me to any of your other ones. anyways i haven't told anyone about owen either."

"who the heck's owen?"

i sigh, i've missed sam, "the dude who's kind of looking after me, i live in his holiday house, he doesn't live in australia, remember? i told you briefly about him in english."

"ohhh..." he says finally remembering.

"yeah..."

there was a small moment where we both said nothing. it has been so long since i've seen sam and in a way, it's so weird that i've got him back.

"so, are you good? living alone?" he finally breaks the silence.

i sniffle as a tear falls down my cheek, "yeah, it's okay, it's nice to not have people around to tell you what to do or whatever. but i do get lonely sometimes."

"mm..."

i really wanted to tell him everything, what's been going on with me and how i've missed him so much. but no words will ever explain what i've felt like when he's been gone.

"bro i've missed you, but i really gotta go." sam says after another small silence.

"yeah, the bell's gonna go soon." i reply, more tears falling out, why am i crying so much? i never cry. ever since the incident with ruel, i've been crying so much lately. maybe it's the stress i don't know.
but i honestly never cried before all this.

"we'll talk later, after school."

"okay, love you, bye."

"bye."

and then he hung up.

i cried until the bell went for third period, for some reason no one was in the bathroom so i looked at myself in the mirror.
i saw all these stupid flaws no one else could see.
i pulled up my sleeve and saw all the cuts i did on my wrist.
i lifted up my shirt and saw all the bruises and scars from all my previous foster parents.

then i looked into my e/c eyes and i thought if i just said goodbye to the world, everything would finally be okay. but i can't do that to sam. we just got each other back.

i quickly put my earphones in my pocket, as well as my phone.

i walk out of the bathroom and a nice, cool breeze blows on my face.
i wipe my tears away and smile, a fake one, obviously. i don't want anyone caring for me right now.

i see ruel sitting in the library, i don't know how i feel about him.
he's so complicated. but what i do know, if that i want him to rap his long lanky arms around me and rock me back and fourth reassuring me about everything.

but that can't happen.

ruel gets up and heads out of the library. he looks at me and i look at him. i then shake my head an walk off.

no, i can't be friends with him, i can't.
i promised myself.

* * *

the day seemed to go on forever.
when it was finally time to go home, i had already packed up my things and was out the door in a second.

i just wanted to go home and curl up in my bed and sleep forever and never wake up.
you know how nice that would be?

instead, half way home someone called my name.

"y/n!" it was ruel, he was walking quickly to catch up to him.

"hey." he says smiling.

that damn smile.

"hi." i mutter looking down at my feet.

"what's up?"

i look at him, "just trying to go home..."

"well i'll come with ya."

oh grate i really don't want him to-

"i mean not go into your house with you, haha that would be weird" he scratches behind his head, "it's just i live close to you, after i dropped you off at your house the other day, i realised how close our houses are."

"um..okay."

as much as i tell myself that i won't be friends with him.
i really freaking want to.

we walk in silence for a while. well the world around us wasn't, cars driving past, birds chirping loudly, dogs barking... but it was quiet in a way.

"so can i ask you something?" ruel says pushing his hair behind this ears.

"yeah, sure." i smile a small smile.

"why did you come out of the bathroom crying?" he questions as his walking slows.

"um... i wasn't-"

"yes you where, i saw you." he interrupts.

i fondle with a price of my hair, "i was just tired." i lied.

i could tell he knew i was lying, but he didn't press me.

"oh, and who was the guy that you where hugging for like 10 minutes in english today?"

i chuckle, "oh that was sam."

"...your boyfriend?" he asks shyly.

i laugh, probably to loud, "no, he's my best friend, besides, he's gay."

ruel smiles, "oh wow."

we chat about stupid things until i'm home. he walks up to the front porch with me like last time.

"well, here we are again." he says leaning against the wall with his hands in his pocket.

"yup..."

we look into each other's eyes for a good moment. ruels eyes are so beautiful.

"okay, well, i'll see you tomorrow."
ruel says, still not looking away from my eyes.

"yeah." i break his gaze and he walks off. i stand there and watch him walk away until i couldn't see him anymore.

when i walk in side, i slide down against the door and pull my knees to my chest and wrap my arms around them.

i close my eyes and picture ruel.

i don't know what i'm feeling but i think i'm falling in love.

a/n:
guys guys guys guys guys guys guys guys guys guys guys guys GUYS!!!
i went to ruels free time concert on tuesday and it was amazing holy moly
like i wish i could go back and see him again ahhhhh it was soo good.
it was honestly the best and the crowd was so good and yeah it was amazing.
anyways thank you so much for 300 views whatt???
please comment and vote! i love you!