run over - ruel vandijk

• favourite song •

some days, i'm up staring at the empty street from my window. and i think about life. there's a billion different ways it could've turned out and this is what happened. i'm not complaining. life right now is...it's okay. i just never know what i'm going to expect. there's times i feel empty again, and it's okay to feel empty, it totally is. but sometimes it can take over you and you can drown in it. that's where you got to distract yourself. i normally take a walk or read a book or write some music. but sometimes, none of that can help. so what do you do? i still haven't figured it out yet. i want to, but i don't know what to do.

life is a funny thing, you know, you'll see someone walking down the street that you've never met, and they could have so much going on. they could have kids, a family, who knows? but you don't know because you're just a background character in their life. but they're the background character to you.

these sort of things keep me up at night. it's so fascinating thinking about how crazy life is. i never would've thought that i could make it. but i did. i am here.

it's  5pm. i am taking a little walk. i don't really know where i am going, i'm just letting the road take me. i look up at the setting sky, it's pink and orange mixed with yellows and reds. i smile, the world likes to help you out sometimes too. 

it's an empty street, no ones really here. i notice it looks a little familiar here but i don't really know. i see a car slowly coming up just front of me. i move to the side to let it past but it slows to a stop.

someone gets out, and walks towards me, it's ruel. i smile and look down at my shoes. he grabs my hand and spins me around, "mylady." he kisses my hand and i laugh.

i nod to him and take his other hand, "what are you doing here?" i ask him smiling.

"oh, i was just at the tree." he winks. "i've missed you!"

"ruel it's been a day!" i squeeze his hand, "i've missed you too."

he shakes his head to get his hair out of his eyes, "yes, i am aware it's been a day, but i have still missed you."

i laugh and he hugs me tight. we look up at the sky and ruel takes a breath in, "are you cold y/n?"

i shiver, "no."

ruel smiles, "yes you are." he says and takes off his hoodie, "here chuck this on."

"thanks." i mock him and pull the hoodie on. it smelt like him, it made me feel safe.

"hey!" ruel says like he's realised something. "this is where we first met."

i smile, it was, i pat ruel on the back, "and it's also where you almost ran me over."

we laugh together and ruel puts an arm around me.

i close my eyes and suddenly i am back. back to that very first day. when i couldn't handle it anymore and i wanted for him to hit me. i am back to the times where everything felt like an effort. everything felt like a pain and like i was slowing breaking. i am back to me. just me. i am back to my broken self.

i open my eyes and a tear falls down. ruel doesn't notice. but when i look at him, i realise that i am still that same girl. except i am better. and i am happier. and i am me. and i am with him. and things have gotten so much better and it all started here. in this empty street.

and i can tell ruel feels the same too. he knows that this is where he found the one. he knows that i am better and he knows he helped me.

ruel squeezes me closer and i lay my head on him, watching the world shut down for the night.

"can i tell you something i just realised?" ruel says quietly.

"always."

"have you ever heard a song a couple times and enjoyed it or whatever but then you hear i again and you think 'wow, this is the best song i've ever heard.'" he rubs my shoulder. "like you already knew it existed but for some reason it really hits you that one time. and you're like wow i wanna hear it again. so you play it again. and you think you're only gonna play it once more than you play it again. and again. and again. you fall in love with the beat. you fall in love with the rhythm. you fall in love with the lyrics and everything about. it you can't get enough of it. it's constantly in your head and all you want is that song. i think that's what it's like to fall in love. you know about that person for a while but one day something about them catches you off guard. then you start talking to them which is like hitting play. and you want to keep talking to them so you do, which is like putting it on repeat. then you fall in love with their eyes. you fall in love with their smile. and you fall in love with their personality. you fall in love with everything about them you can't get enough of them. they're constantly in your head and all you want is that person. i think falling in love is like discovering your favourite song."

"wow. that makes so much sense...well i definitely discovered my favourite song." i lean over and kiss him on the cheek.

he smiles softly, "me too."

"thank you." i whisper into his chest.

ruel kisses my head, "no thank you."

* * *

love is a tricky thing. you never know when you're going to feel it. i certainly felt it when i least expected it, but i knew ruel was the one.

and i hope you find you're one. you're person. you're love. i hope you find the kind of love that makes you softer for a person. the kind of love that makes you want to be a better man or women, the kind of love that believes in you and supports you, that stands by your side. i hope you find someone that quickly becomes your favourite thing—someone who makes the fall less fearful, someone you must choose every day. i hope you find someone that shows you just how deeply you can feel, just how deeply you can love. i hope you find something real, because nothing is more beautiful than loving someone who loves you back. nothing is more beautiful than loving someone who builds you a home in their heart. i hope you feel how i felt. how i felt with ruel, you know we had our ups and downs and we managed to fight. we fought for our love and i hope you can too.

i know you can.

so that's it folks, my life story. and this is me, signing off. until next time,

y/n l/n.

a/n: so i finally finished it!!! thank you to everyone who stick around and help me keep this story going. there's been times i didn't want to upload but i knew there was eager reads for it. i want to say thank you for all of you guys commenting, i do read all of them (even if i don't reply x) i have made some really good friends during this story, y'all know who you are, and even if you didn't make friends with me, or anyone, shoot me a message or post on my wall, i'd love to talk and know more about you. i'm not sure if i'll write another book but i might! you never know. i hope you liked the crazy story of y/n l/n, i might go back and edit it because i am aware of some spelling mistakes and errors, but for now, thank you, just for reading it. i've always loved writing and it's great to mix it with other things i love like rUeL. anyways THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU! 💜💜💜💜