Black Leather Jackets: College Bound

Funeral

Cheryl's POV
Today's the day of the funeral
Before it's open to the public I asked that her family and closest friends have a half an hour to say goodbye.
"Mommy what's a funeral?" Lexi asks as I zip her dress up
"We are going to see Mama, and say goodbye to her,"
"We get to see her?"
"Kind of Baby, she looks like she's asleep,"
"Oh," she says
I pick her up and kiss her temple
"She's so proud of you Lexi, so so proud,"
"I know mommy,"
"Thank you for being such a big girl the last few days, but if you need to talk to me, come see me okay?"
"I promise,"
"Good girl,"
I go help TJ into his suit and Mia in her dress.
"Mommy!" Mia giggles "hair pretty,"
"Thank you Baby," I laugh
"Mommy member when mama care to hospital and hold me?"
"Pardon?"
"She not there when you were and you hold me,"
"You remember that Mia?"
She was only two hours old
"I remember evy ting mommy,"
"Mia What was your first word?"
"Mama? In my bed!"
She shouldn't remember that either
"You remember Mama?"
"Ya,"
She has a perfect memory?
"Okay baby, lets go okay?"
"Okay,"
"Robbie, are you ready?" I yell
"Ya,"
He comes out in a suit with his football jersey over top.
"You look great Robbie,"
"Thank you,"
We drive to the funeral home and I carry TJ and Mia in.
"Here cher I'll take TJ," Reggie says
"No I stay with mommy," he says grabbing my arm "please,"
"Can you take Mia for a bit?" I ask
"For sure,"
"Have they let you in?"
"They're waiting for you," Liz says
"Baby boy can you stay with Liz for 2 minutes? I'll be right back,"
"No Mommy, no," he says
"Okay monster, lets go in then,"
I walk in and the casket is closed with an American Flag over it.
"That's Mama?" Tony asks
"Yes it is,"
"Why with the flag,"
"Because she was a soldier sweetheart,"
"Mrs. topaz, is everything as you wanted it?"
"Can it be open casket?"
"Of course," the general says
They open the top and she looks beautiful.
She wearing her USA football jersey overtop of her army dress uniform.
"She's pretty," Tony says
"She's very pretty," I say fixing her hair with my open hair
I put him down for a second and kiss her forehead.
I pick Tony back up and he reaches for her hand and pulls back
"You can touch her baby, you aren't going to hurt her,"
He touches her hand and starts crying.
"She's not warm," he says
"No she isn't baby,"
"I miss her mommy,"
"I know baby, I miss her too,"
I go let the Mantles, Morgan's, Sweetpea, Fangs, Coach, Georgie, and Tyler in
Lexi stands in the far corner staring at the casket.
Everyone pays their respects and hangs around and I go back to Lexi
"Lexi wanna come with me to see Mama?"
"I'm scared Mommy,"
"Why?"
She shrugs and I rub her arm
"Lexi I'll go up with you, just me and you?" Tony says "She's really pretty, and she has her football jersey on,"
"Can we?" Lexi asks
I put Tony down and nod.
They slowly make their way up and stand on the stool to see Toni.
They're so small to be seeing this
"How are they doing?" Liv asks
"They're leaning on eachother," I sigh
"That's good atleast,"
She hugs me and I start crying again
"I miss her everyday," I cry "and it's not getting better Liv,"
"It will Cheryl, she's with you everyday,"
I nod and sigh
"I did learn that Mia is a genius today," I say
"Huh,"
"Watch,"
We go over to Mia and Reggie and I take her
"Mia can you tell Livvie your first memory of Mama?"
"She came in hopital when Mommy was holding me and asked to hold her ittle gil," she says
Liv looks at me confused
"How do you know that sweetheart," Liv ask
"I member erryting?"
"Baby you remember Europe?"
"Ya, the pane skay,"
"The plane was scary?"
She nods and covers her ears
"Hut my eyuh,"
Reggie puts her down and she walks around
"She remembers everything," I say "she told me this morning,"
"She definitely has a better memory than me," Reggie says
"Maybe she'll remember Tones at least," I sigh watching her waddle towards her brother and sister "maybe she will understand,"
Everyone nods and goes back to telling stories about Toni.
"Cheryl, can I talk to you for a second?"
"Of course Robbie,"
We walk a little away from the group and he looks at me.
"Are you okay with me seeing Toni?" He asks
"Ya, of course! Why wouldn't I be?"
"My mom told me I couldn't see my dad because I.. didn't deserve too. I hadn't lived up to the standard he set and I definitely haven't lived up to how great Toni was,"
"Robbie, go say your goodbyes. It's okay, it's more than okay," I say rubbing his arm "never compare yourself to anyone, your one of the best kids I've ever met, okay? I know I've been distracted the last few days but my door is always open okay?"
He nods and starts crying.
"She was the first person to believe in me," he says "ever, even my dad never thought I could be a good player,"
"You wanna know something?" I ask sitting down
"Sure?"
"The first tryout Toni held at Riverdale High, she came home absolutely exhausted. She was wiped, but before we went to bed she looked at me and said that there was a kid at Tryouts that reminded her of herself. She said she didn't know what it was about him but that he was a fantastic player and had the same vibe as she used to on the field and Reggie saw it too," I say "the second tryout I was there and she pointed at you and said that kid is a star Cheryl, he's special,"
"The day after that she gave me her lunch," he whispers "the day of her third tryout was my 5th day straight without food and she must have noticed or something because she gave me her entire lunch,"
"In high school before she met me and before she had a job, she went 3 weeks without food, like real food- she'd eat scraps from a garbage can or the maybe a lone granola bar in her locker but that's it,"
"I know what that's like too,"
"Wanna go see her? Say goodbye?"
He nods
"Can you come with me?"
I nod and walk over with him.
"She looks so peaceful," he whispers
"She looks happy," I say with a small smile
He stands there and cries a little while saying a silent goodbye.
"Thank you for saving me Mom, I'm going to miss you," he says "I love you so much, I can't believe you're actually gone,"
"She's never gone Robbie, she's always with you,"
He nods and wipes his tears.
"Cheryl," Reggie says
I turn and he sighs
"Are you okay if we let others in now?"
"Oh yes, of course I lost track of time," I say "sorry,"
"There's no rush Cheryl," he says
Rob goes outside for air and I just fade into the background of the noise.
Tony and Lexi are with Lizzy and LJ and AJ
Reggie and RJ are talking to old teammates
Liv is talking to Ronnie
And I just want to talk to Toni
So many people saying they're sorry for my loss, and how great Toni was.
People I barely know.
These are all Toni's friends.
Not mine.
I walk to another area where I can see people coming in and out and i see something that catches my eyes
Her entire team is here.
All the boys she coached, even the graduated ones
It makes me cry even harder
"Mrs. Topaz, we all wanted to pay our respects to Coach Topaz If that's alright," Trey says
I nod and give him a small smile through my tears
"Thank you," I whisper
Ralphy gives me a hug and some flowers
"Coach Topaz changed all of us forever, we promise what she stood for and what she built will not be forgetten Cheryl," he says "not for a long time,"
I nod and they give me some space.
"Mommy?" Lexi asks
"Yes Buggy?" I say bending down and fixing her hair
"Who is that scary man?" She asks pointing towards someone
I look and it's Toni's Uncle Tom.
"It's Mamas Uncle," I say standing up
I walk towards him and he notices right away
"Cheryl, I hope it's okay I showed up,"
"Of course it is Tom, how have you been?"
"I'm doing alright," he says "still sober,"
"I'm sorry I didn't call you directly I don't have your number and I've been very overwhelmed,"
"No no, it's alright. Antoniette called me a few months back, just to make sure I was doing well,"
"Mommy?"
I look down and see Tony Junior pulling my dress.
"Hi baby boy, wanna meet someone that knew Mama when she was your age?"
He nods and I pick him up
"Tom this is our youngest son Tony Junior, Tony this is Toni's Uncle Thomas," I say bouncing him
"Hey fighter, how are you?" Tom asks
"I'm sad," he says "and I miss mama,"
"I miss her too Tony," He says
"Mommy LJ and Auntie Liv are going outside for some air, may I go too?"
"Of course TJ, be good okay?"
He nods and I kiss his temple and let him go with Liv.
"He looks exactly like Aaron at that age,"
"He acts exactly like Toni too," I sigh "he's taking it the hardest,"
We talk for a bit before I let him go and someone else walks in
Jughead fucking Jones
"Jughead please leave," I whisper "please,"
"Nice to see you too Blossom," He says "Veronica is here, why dont I get a second chance too?"
"Jughead I will talk to you about this, but not today please- let my family grieve,"
He storms off and I sigh.
"Cheryl do you need to talk?" RJ asks
"I'm alright, I'm just going to the bathroom, watch Lexi and Mia won't you?"
He nods and I walk to the washroom.
I walk in and someone covers my mouth right away
In the mirror I see it's jughead
Fuck me.
"Blossom, DONT stop me form seeing Toni, and don't say no to this. You're not married or dating anyone," he says
He tries to get my dress up and I punch and kick.
If you're going to be like this maybe I'll just send you to see your wife instead,"
He starts choking me and I gasp for air
I start passing out when someone walks in
"Cher, Reggie asked me to come.." I hear Ronnie say "oh my gosh, Jughead?"
She yells for help and Ralphy, Trey, Robbie, and Harrison are the first ones there
They rip him off me and Robbie punches him twice.
"Rob stop, stop," I pant "I'm okay,"
My voice is really scratchy
"Just let him go," I wheeze
Jughead takes off and I collapse
Ronnie bends down and looks at my eyes and breathing.
"Cheryl you're dehydrated, as well as lost a lot of oxygen to the brain, how long has it been since you drank water,"
"S-since Sunday," I stutter
"The last day Toni was alive?" She says
"I just got busy," I sigh
"Robbie can you get Reggie and some water,"
He nods and walks away and the other boys are wide eyed and looking at my neck
"Is it bruising?" I ask Ralphy
He nods cautiously
"It looks bad," he says quietly
"It is," Ronnie sighs "why today of all days does that asshole show up,"
"Because of course he does Ronnie! He won't give me one day to remember my wife, he always ruined everything for me, And now that he's back he's going to kill me," I snap
"I won't let that happen," she says "I promised Toni,"
I stand up fast and push through the boys to go find my kids.
Where are they? Where are they?
I see Mia and Lexi and go over and hug them.
"Mommy what happened to your neck?" Lexi asks
"I'm okay sweetheart," I say
"And your voice!" She says
"Where's TJ?"
Right on cue TJ runs over and hugs me.
"Mommy are you okay?"
"I'm okay, I'm okay as long as you're okay baby,"
"The man tried to grab me outside, but he ran away,"
I hug him and kiss the side of his head
"I'm okay baby," I whisper "I'm okay,"
Reggie gives me a drink and then it's time for them to take her to the next room for the funeral processions
"Can I have a minute alone?" I ask him
He nods and everyone leaves the room to go to the main area.
I step forward and touch her face and fix her hair
"Why'd you have to go so soon Tones? We had so much time, we did," I start crying "I don't know how to do anything without you, I'm so scared, I'm so alone now. I feel so alone in that room in that house. I can't do this alone TT,"
I put my hand on hers and play with her ring.
"I'm sorry, that isn't fair babe. I'm happy you aren't in anymore pain, that you don't have to feel it anymore. I already know you're in paradise watching us, but I miss you and I'm always going to, I can't breathe without you Toni Topaz,"
I wait a second, in silent, Hail Mary prayer, that she's joking. That this is all fake
Or that I'm dreaming
But I'm not
"Fly high Toni Topaz, ill see you again soon babygirl,"
I kiss her forehead and put my Cherry necklace, that I gave her the day I broke up with Ronnie, in her hands
"Wait for me Topaz, I'm yours forever,"
I close the casket and flatten the American flag.
"Ready?" Reggie asks
"I'm never going to be ready reggie,"
He nods and I go into the room that the next part of the ceremony is happening in.
"The dance" by Garth brooks starts playing while Reggie, RJ, Georgie, Tyler, Pea, and Fangs walk her down the aisle
Lexi squeezes my hand and I keep crying
"It's okay to cry Mommy," she says
I nod and take Mia from Liv