FOREVER, YOURS // Matty Healy.

How far can I go before you really can't contain yourself anymore?

Matty

To my delight there weren't many more interactions with Nessa for a few weeks. I somehow managed to avoid her being anywhere near me or Alyssa and that eased my worries a little. The scary thing is that I wanted to tell Alyssa the truth about Nessa but every time I would go to tell her it felt like I was doing a bad thing. It would only cause Alyssa to worry that I was going to run off with Nessa and break her heart.

I felt terrible about it all though, there's no way I could tell Alyssa the truth without explaining that I cheated on my girlfriend with Nessa, surely that would plant more seeds of doubt. I'm probably doing the wrong thing here but surely there's more to lose than gain at this point and as far as I believe Nessa has the power to ruin my relationship if she truly wanted to, it didn't seem like that was her intention whatsoever. Maybe I'm being naive here but I hope that I'm not wrong.

Avoiding Nessa would only work for so long though because our album was out and everyone wanted to celebrate. Jamie wanted to throw a party for us, no matter how apprehensive I seemed to be about that fact, he still did it anyway. And any moment George would walk into this club with Nessa and it would be back to square one, trying to find ways to avoid speaking to her without it being too obvious.

Alyssa was sat next to me looking as good as ever, she barely had to make an effort and still looked the best in whatever room she was in. I could see her steal glances at me and would always look away with a shy smile on her lips, it was cute to see her still so innocent at times. As if she didn't want me to know she was staring. I love it if I'm honest.

"Are you not drinking tonight?" Alyssa finally spoke up. I gave her a smile and nodded.

"Yeah, I will be." I returned. "I'm just waiting until everyone else gets here."

"Oh, right okay." She nodded along. "We just waiting on George?"

"Yeah." I said. "You look amazing tonight." I saw her blush a little and try to hide her smile but I could still see it. "Aw, are you embarrassed?"

"Shut up." She giggled and rolled her eyes. "Thank you though."

"You don't need to thank me for telling the truth." I shot at her, she looked at me with her eyes filled with so much love and happiness. It melted my heart a little to see her in such a good mood.

"Why you being all sappy tonight." She squinted her eyes at me. "You feeling all emotional about the album being out?"

"Maybe a little." I smirked. "It's been a long process and all that work has come down to this moment."

"I'm happy for you, I know how hard you've worked on this and it's amazing." She beamed. "I'm sure you'll get all of the recognition you deserve for it."

"You're too kind." I put my arm around her shoulders and pulled her into my body. "I kinda wish we could blow off this party and just spend the night in bed."

"I bet that's not the only thing you want to be blown off tonight." She smirked, a look of desire flashing in her eyes. If she doesn't stop these games soon then I will insist we leave very soon.

"Don't start that so early in the night please, I don't think I can handle it." I groaned.

"That's what makes it so fun." She grinned. I threw my head back and sighed.

"You're gonna be the death of me." I said. She just leaned in and put her lips on my neck, grazing ever so gently.

"Let's play a game Matty, how far can I go before you really can't contain yourself anymore?" She said in a hushed tone, her lips tickled my neck as she spoke and it drove me wild. How was I supposed to deal with this all night? One minute she was blushing because I said she looks amazing and now she's actively trying to turn me on in the middle of a nightclub. I hate that I love it so much though because this is a dangerous game she's playing. I looked down at her and smiled evilly.