Blazing Rivers

13

RIVER

    Blaze yelled in my face and ran, not looking back. Before she walked away I saw that look in her eye. A look I recognise all too well. She was struggling, breaking inside, feeling too vulnerable for her own liking. She was hiding something deep down inside of her.

I notice someone get out of a car, running up towards me.

"Is she okay? What happened?" She said out of breath. "I'm her godmother."

I wonder where her mom is.

"She ran out." I tell the woman.

"Could we talk about her? Please." The woman begged. She looked at a loss.

"Sure. Follow me."

Nicola, tells me everything about Blaze. How her drinking and drug abuse started. How some of her friends have influenced her. The time she started to change.

It all made sense.

She's like me in way.

A lot like me.

I have to help this girl before she gets herself killed, because she will. No doubt in my mind about it.

"I think I should try something different with Blaze."

"Like what?"

"Maybe she'd benefit from something less conventional. For example in a setting she'd prefer. I'd be more like a friend to her than a mentor." I explain.

"Do you think that would work?" Nicola looks hopeful.

"I've never really tried it. But I think it would."

My mom did something like this for me when I was struggling through things. We'd go out every few days, different places each time and slowly I started opening up.

Personally I think it would work for Blaze.

Hopefully anyways.

"Okay then. I'll talk to her about it first. I'll call you." Nicola said as I guide her outside towards her car.

We said our goodbyes and I stroll back to my office.

Today has been one of those days. Actually this whole entire week has been dreadful. Somedays I wonder why I do my job. The people that come to the sessions are obviously not being fully genuine with there intentions and some are just coming along but not taking it seriously.

That was until Blaze showed up today.

Sitting at my desk I sigh, thinking back to this morning when I bought a bottle of whiskey. I haven't touched that stuff for 2 and a half years. Though recently it's been even harder to cope, stress of work, family.

I get the bottle out from inside my desk and place it on top. Earlier I probably would've drank some. Now. Now I don't think I want to. The temptation for alcohol is hard sometimes, especially when everything gets to much. Today I really thought I'd go downhill, I was prepared for the downfall. I had a rehab facility waiting and everything.

I lost hope I guess. I still feel as though I am.

Taking the bottle out of the paper bag I stand up, walking towards the small sink that I have in the office.

The room seems to go even stuffier as I open the bottle, staring down at it for a while. It's taking everything in me not to take a swig. Like I'm holding on by a thread.

I lift the bottle and pour the contents down the sink, watching the whiskey go down the plug hole.

Going back to my desk, I lean back in my chair, putting my head in my hands, groaning, knowing I nearly relapsed, and I was so close.

I don't know what pulled me back, making me rethink. But I'm glad, I can't be who I was those years ago. I can't.

———————

   Light shining through my blinds, woke me. Sprawled out on my sofa, with my legs hanging off, I, wobbly stand to my feet, going towards my kitchen. While waiting for my kettle to be boiled I sat down on the kitchen stool, checking my messages.

All the messages are from my mother, asking me when I'm coming to visit her in New York, or what I'm up to recently. Around 10 messages each day and I only respond to one or two. I love my mother deeply but she doesn't know when to be quiet sometimes. I wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for her though. She's honestly my miracle.

Hearing that the kettle is boiled, I put some coffee in my cup and pour in the hot water. Sipping on the hot substance I hear my phone chime.

Probably my mother again.

Glancing at my phone I see that it's from Mrs. Casen. Reading through one of the messages my heart stops.

Blaze is in hospital.

Finding out Blaze is in hospital made me uneasy, and a pain in my chest.

I'm making it my mission to help this girl.

I think it will help us both. Because from a glance I could tell that she was just like me.

Damaged.

Falling apart from the inside out.

I have to stop her from falling further.

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UNEDITED

Wanted to fill in some blanks with this one, and so you guys have a little insight to River's mind and his life.

Hope everyone is doing well and stuff.

I might be going on a tiny break so I can plan out and see where the rest of the story is going. I'm not sure though it just depends how I feel.