A/B/O || Jinkook

49. Moving on

The cold winds don't even bother me since I can't feel them. My entire body is numb upon seeing the mark. I'm not even sure what kind of face I'm making, but whatever it is Seokjin takes one look at me and his hand automatically goes up to cover the side of his neck. He nervously waits for me to do something, but I can't even tell how I should react to this. I don't feel angry or jealous, I don't even feel sad. I don't feel anything. 

"Who is he?" I ask. "It's not the same as last time."

His eyes go back to the snow by his feet before answering.

"A guy at work. He's in the new division I'm working for."

"Oh. I see. Is he kind to you?"

"He's... like most other alphas I guess."

I simply nod in response. An alpha at work, huh? They should be on about the same level of maturity if they work in the same place. Maybe they're closer in age too. If he's found someone to be with then who am I to come here and interfere? I can't get in the way of that happiness for him. This is what I wanted anyway. He should be with someone who treats him well, someone who is honest and respects him. 

"I'm happy for you, Hyung. I was scared you'd still be upset over what I did, but it looks like you've moved on just fine. That's good. And I'm not being sarcastic, I genuinely am happy for you. I actually came here because of what Yoongi-hyung said about you. He told me you were heartbroken just like me and it made me very worried. My mind went to all kinds of places and I even thought you might die because of me. So silly, right? I don't need to worry about you at all. You're fine. Being with another alpha helped you. You've moved on. You have someone to take care of you now. If you've chosen to mate with someone then they must be worthy of you. It's a big relief actually. Now I don't need to feel like I've doomed the both of us. I can rest easy."

His eyes are slightly glossy when looking at me. He keeps his hand over the mark, perhaps to try and shield me from it.

"No, JK... I don't know how to explain this to you. I don't want you to get upset."

"I'm not upset. Really! I'm over the moon that you've found someone. I think it's great!"

He sighs.

"No, that's not it. I-I've been meaning to tell you that last week I had my heat and-"

"It's fine, Hyung! You don't need to explain yourself to me. He's your new mate, so of course he helped you. Don't worry, I'm not mad."

I try my best at being genuine but every reinforcement just makes him look more bothered. Does he feel that bad about moving on from me? Wasn't that the whole point of breaking up? Sure, the thought of him getting knotted by someone is more than slightly infuriating, but what can I do about it? Nothing. He's rejected me and moved on. I can't force him to be with me. Then I'd be just as bad as every other scary alpha trying to get a hold of him.

This is such a big relief though. He won't die of heartbreak. I'm so incredibly happy over that. He can live a happy, long life. 

"JK, are you sure you're feeling alright?" he asks. "I don't think this is a normal reaction from your side. Shouldn't you be, I dunno... angry? You're worrying me."

"Oh, yes, I'm great! You needn't worry about me from now on, Hyung. Why would I be angry? We're not together. In fact you should just think of me as a complete stranger from now on. There's no reason for us to keep in contact. I'm sure seeing my face will just make you feel bad, so I'll save you the trouble. The same goes for me."

He shakes his head at me. 

"What are you talking about? Are you just saying that because you're upset? You're not fine, JK. I can feel it all the way over here."