Can I stay? (Gerard Way x Reader)

The End (95)

"Yeah of course" I reply with a smile. He's giving me that look,the one he does when he wants to talk about something serious. He seems gentle and caring, it puts my mind at ease. Plus nothing could ruin the amazing evening I've just had. 

"I've been thinking about this a while, and I've asked around to find the right person. I think I've found them and I met with them too. They're really nice Y/N and I need you to trust me" he says lifting my chin to meet his eyes.

"What do you mean, who?" I respond, curious and giving a little nervous laugh.

"You've been through so much Y/N and you have been so strong, but I know things like that they.. they bring a person down and as much as I want to be the one to help you I'm not a professional. I love you Y/N. So fucking much. All i want is for you to be happy, but I get scared when your breathing speeds up or when you go quiet."

I can't think of anything to say. I didn't expect Gerard to say that. I've been thinking it a while but I didn't want to seem weak and I HATE opening up to people I barely know. It scares the hell out of me. 

"I have booked a meeting with a therapist. You can talk everything out and get some proper help, because you deserve to not have to be scared for the rest of your life" he smiles taking my hand and rubbing gentle circles on my palm.

"Please.. don't leave me alone. I can't do this alone, don't send me away" I whisper with as much strength as I can manage. 

"Hey shh" he smiles almost seeming relieved. "Nobody is going anywhere, I'm not going anywhere. And you absolutely won't be alone! It's not an inpatient or anything, we go and talk to them once a month or more depending on how the first session goes, either together or alone whatever is more comfortable. I know it'll be scary but if you need me I promise I'll be here". He leans forward and wraps me in a hug.

"I'll try, I promise" I sigh. I know this is for the best and that it's coming from a positive place and I don't want to let him down. I don't want to let myself down. I don't want to look back on life and wish I'd given myself a chance when it's literally being handed to me right now. 

"That's my girl" Gee whispers against my neck. I can feel his warm breath against my ear and it sends tingles up my spine. He flips me so that I'm under him, looking up into his eyes. 

"Want to have some fun?" he asks smirking.

----------------------major time skip brought to you by the final chapter ------------------------------

"It's been 12 months since John left us now and we've got a new manager. He's absolutely amazing! He gives us ideas for shows, tours, even music since he has a good ear for instrumentation himself. He's nice to me, genuinley, which is really cool. It's like I have a friend in him and even the other guys get along well. We really are like a little family now, and we go everywhere together. 

Progress on the new album is amazing and it's nearly finished! It's called danger days and it has this whole comic style backstory. You'll love it I'm sure. I can't wait for all of this to come out so people get the chance to listen! I also want to highlight how thankful I am to be a part of this band, with such talented guys. It really has been a dream come true." I smile looking down the camera lens.

"CUT" the director yells, bringing the buzz back into the studio. 

"Thanks Y/N that's all for today" the friendly presented says shaking my hand. I thank them before making my way out of the studio and meeting Gerard outside.

"Hey beautiful" he smiles placing  kiss on my forehead.

"Heyo" I smile walking  ahead of him.

"Wait for me" he smirks, which makes me speed up even more until it gets to the point where we're both running down the road like maniacs. But the thing is.. I don't care. 

This is what I've come to realise, I've spent so much of my life worrying. Worrying that I wasn't good enough. Worrying that I didn't belong. Worrying that I was too big, too small, too loud, too annoying. But I've come to realise that nobody gives a shit. Cherish the people who love you for you and fuck the ones who don't. not literally. It's difficult, it's really difficult but once I realised that the only person being so critical to me was mysef I could start to change. Experience life as it's meant to be.. lived. And not just in my head but in my heart and in the world around me.

I guess therapy did make a difference, but I was the one who put in the effort. I just needed someone to believe in me and I was thankful enough to have that. If anyone could hear my thoughts right now I would want them to know, that they are loved. They are strong enough and that their life is exactly that.. theirs. So live it and be amazing.

I love Gee with my whole heart, he gives me attention when I need it, protection when I'm low or self conscious but most importantly he pushes me to be the best version of myself possible. I do the same for him, or at least I try my hardest to.

"Hey where have you gone" he smiles, noticing that I've drifted off into my head. He ruffles my hair teasingly and switches on the console for another round of Mario Kart. I'll win this time. 

"No way" I smile giving him a playful wink.

I pick up the controller and slump down on the couch next to him, leaning my head onto his shoulder.

I guess the answer to that question I asked so long ago:

"Can I stay?"

Was yes. It always has been yes.