This Man

THIS MAN

PROLOGUE

This man, the serious man. This man has always had everyone on their toes. A man that has no friends, no social life, a man who doesn't mingle with anyone. How can one have a life in an eggshell? The Lucas family is one of the wealthiest familes in the city of Durban. Every human being wishes to work in H.L Construction. Every male admires and envies this mans hard working self. The very most uptight man who always takes life way too serious.

There's nothing good about the mornings, as tired as you are, you gotta get you're ass to work. Meetings back to back, interviews being held back and fourth.
If I knew starting a business from scratch was this frustrating, i wouldn't have even bothered hammering myself. I've always been my father's shadow, I've always handled his businesses while he traveled all over the world with his wife. Ever since the death of my elder brother things changed. Do you know the pain of being compared to the dead, well I've learnt to live with it.

I'm standing in my office looking outside the window, looking at the busy town of Durban Central. My heart is heavy and i just feel down, i just felt like being outside the office. The knock on the door disturbs my thoughts that are buried deep in my head.
"Did i tell you to come in?" My PA sometimes doesn't think she's way too forward and it annoys me."get out and go knock again." She huffed and walked back to the door to knock again.
"Come in" i tell her. "How can i help you Emily?".
"The interviews are about to commence sir, you are needed." She bows her head and rushes out the door. This flat ass is something else. Why does she like wearing tight things knowing fully that her body is shapeless. I pick up my note pad and follow her behind. I find the boardroom packed already with HR. I nodded my head acknowledging them and made my ass comfortable on the chair

I've never been in an interview before, so i really cannot relate how it feels like to be asked these fucken silly questions. I have a feeling that all of these people have been reading from the same script.
"Why do you think you're fit for this position?" The response will be "I'm a very hard worker, who takes work seriously. I work well under pressure." Bla bla bla what a manuscript. Just can't wait for this to be over i need my personal time, there's nothing i enjoy more than my own space.
Finally were done but we don't have the best candidate. Today was a deal breaker. I want someone who will change my work space, someone  different, not these fake barbie dolls.

Ever since the passing of my brother I had a mental break down, was in and out of hospitals. My relationship with Amanda has been rocky for the past year, I've just learnt to tolerate her. Looking at my brother's body with all those holes in his body made my immune system break down. Those twenty-five bullets still haunt me till today. He didn't deserve to doe like that. We were not that close but his was my one and only older brother. He got mixed up with the wrong crowd at the wrong time. Those bullets were not meant for him, he died for someones else's sins. People may look at me and see a man without problems. Deep inside I'm beyond broken, i have demons that have been haunting me for two year's. I hardly sleep, whenever i close my eye's i have flashbacks of my brother being shot twenty-five times right in front of my eye's. What angers me more is that the man who short him is parading on the streets like he owns it, what can i say our South African justice system is a fucked up one. What breaks me more is that my parents blame me for the death of my brother. Gerld was a drug dealer, no one knew of if hustling except for me.

I look at my father who's standing by the door looking at me. I wonder what he wants, he has never set foot in my work premises. Ever since i started my own business a year ago he has not even once bothered to check on me. I've learnt to live with the fact that i will never be a son to them no matter how hard i try.
"You're mother is trying to hold of you but it sends her straight to voicemail." Lies! lies! lies! It's been a year without seeing them he decides to come up with lies.
"My phone is perfectly fine." I tell him, i still don't know what's the reason of him being here. "Why are you her?" I had to ask. He chucks shaking his head, "you're mother is having special guest later on, she wants you to be there." I just stare at him blankly. Since when do they invite me when they have special guest over? I'm in no mood.
"I can't I'm busy." I just need to be alone. This is the day i lost my brother and this hint is taking a serious toll on me. I flick my hand and glare at my watch "i have a meeting in a few." I have no meeting i just want him gone.
"Very well than let me not keep you, if it happens you change you're you know where to find us." I watched him as he walked out of the office. I think I've had enough for the day. I just need to go home and rest.

I decided to pass by my brother's grave and bought fresh flowers for him. It looks clean, which only means one thing my parenst were here before me. I gently place the flowers on his grave with no words to say just a broken heart.
"I know how much you hate flowers." I laugh at my statement thinking of how much he hated flowers, especially the sunflowers "i know we were not that close but i miss you everyday. You left me and i became an orphan. Sometimes i find myself saying one day you will come back for me and have a brotherhood bond. When i lost the joyful sense of you're presence, i mourned you. You left me in a sense, but only in a sense, i don't even know if I'm making sense myself. Your son, my son will never go hungry to bed while I'm still on this planet. You will forever be in our heart and i hope you're in a better place." I felt the back of my stand and i just knew his behind me. This happens everytime when i visit his grave. A cold wave landed on my shoulder and i knew that my brother is with me. If only i could see him, if only i could get a last chance and be with him.

A refreshing cold breeze hit my face making me to close my eyes and feel the connection. This is the way we've been communicating with each other ever since he departured. At first i found it creepy but months went by and i found myself getting used to it. Gerald Jnr is a photocopy of my brother. His mother got married, i still get the chance to see him whenever i want. Atleast he left a footprint behind.
I drove back home feeling a bit more calmer and more at ease knowing that my brother came through today. My house is very cold but having Gerald Jnr around makes it more warm and homely. I'm not a people's person, I'm just a lonely man who enjoys his own space. Will Hendry Lucas ever find love? Will that person love me with all of my baggages?