This Man

THIS MAN

#11

HENDRY LUCAS

This cannot be happening, those words, were the words he said before taking his last breathe. I'm trying so hard to be strong but I'm failing dismally. How do i explain this? I'm deep in thoughts forgetting that i have Precious around the house.

" You do know, if you don't talk to me i will not know what's bugging you. If you die infront of my eyes i will make sure that i kill you again."

"It's just that.…… i really don't know where to start and how to explain it." I tell her, if i had to tell her a story about my brother where the hell will i even begin?

"Take a deep breathe and start from the beginning." She tells me.

"My parent's Marcus and Tifanny Lucas don't have a close relationship with me. Growing up i was a loner, i wasn't that close with my family. Gerald, my older brother was their favourite son and i was just a shadow. They were so proud to have him, they worshipped the ground he walked on. I sometimes thought i was a mistake in their life, maybe i was not meant to be born. I will get into trouble because of Geralds behaviour. They would blame me for his recklessness. I loved my brother but we were never that close and our bond was not tight. So two year's ago i lost him, he was gunned down right before my eyes. Those twenty-five bullets still haunt me till today. Those unstoppable gun noises made my eardrums have a hearing problem, which no one knows about, if you don't speak loud enough for me to hear you, it makes me mad. Funny enough his parents blame me for his death, I've always been wrong infront of their eyes. Nothing i do make them happy. Do you know what were his his words before taking his last breathe?"

"What?" She asked me as she was brushing my bold head as i rested my head on her laps.

"Look after my son brother, akunamathata. Those words still ring in my ears till today. I do visit his grave for comfort, we were not close but i know he loved me. He sometimes visits me." I'm feeling a huge burden being lifted bit by bit.

"As in, you see him?" I sometimes forget that Precious can be crazy.

"No silly, i dream about him or feel his precense." She stops massaging my head.

"You feel him? Like his near you, as me and you are feeling each other. Like feeling, feeling?" I don't even know how to answer her question. Who asks such questions, God!

"Yes i feel him, as in feeling, feeling. But i feel him more if something bad is about to happen, like the time Gerald Jnr was vi….violated." i stop to trying to catch my breathe. "My brother loved his son more than anything. Maybe if he was still alive i wouldn't be this lonely. I'm a broken man Precious, no one understands my pain, no one understands the things I've been through. Sharing part of my life with you somehow brings peace."

There was a moment of silence. Precious was still trying to process the information she just got about this mystery man. She now understands the grumpiness, the anger and the short temper. Now the man she saw earlier at the mall confused her even more. Who was he?

"You haven't talked to anyone about this?" She asked him with a huge dry lump on her throat, finding it hard to swallow her salvia.

"No, you are the first person to see my broken side, the first person to see me shed a tear. I've never talked to anyone other than you."

"Wait a minute," she pushed my head off her laps and she stood up. "Jehova niece, hell no i refuse to believe this. Come smack me maybe I'm dreaming." What the hell, she has started with her madness.