The Other One | Sirius Black

Chapter 16 - First time

"CRUCIO!" Bellatrix yelled.

The air inside Joanna's lungs was knocked out of her. Shards of glass coursed through her blood. Her chest felt tight and her body weak. Bella's dark figure was no longer clear but foggy. Joanna's knuckles were white as she balled up her fists in pain. Her knees were trembling on the cold marble floor. She could feel Greyback restraining her from behind by pulling at her hair. A cry almost escaped her mouth.

Her vision suddenly cleared but she was not at the Malfoy Manor anymore. She saw the wooden desk with pictures of her and her friends, and the Muggle band poster hanging above it. She wished it wasn't real but it was. She could still feel a tinge of pain from the Cruciatus curses and the Death Eater's hands touching her all over. She decided to go to the bathroom. Her steps were light but her breathing was heavy. She felt sick at the sight of herself and rushed to the toilet to throw up. Shortly after, a pair of hands grabbed her shoulders from behind, and without looking she swatted them away in fear.

Sirius gently spoke, "Take it easy, love."

"I'm sorry, I thought you were... someone else," she justified.

He reassured her, "It's just me."

"It's just you," she breathed out.

He helped her off the cool tile floor and she went on to brush her teeth. Out of human nature, even though she did not want to look in the mirror, she did. She washed out her mouth with water. As she dried herself, her eyes began to tear up. She tried to breathe in and out like everyone had told her to do, but it wasn't working this time. She clenched onto the edge of the sink.

"Hey, what's going on?" Sirius asked.

"It's... I can't... I can't sleep." she choked out.

He continued, "That was a nightmare, wasn't it?"

She nodded.

His figure drew in to embrace hers. At his touch, she began to sob. For the first time, she really cried. She always made it a rule to not cry in front of others and she never did. Not even when James' prank went wrong and he broke her arm when she was only ten. Or during her quidditch match against Slytherin when some bloke pushed her off her broom and Madam Pomfrey had to mend most of her bones in her fifth year. Or when Snivellus began to pick on her to get back at James for teasing him. She always fought those tears back until she was able to go to the washroom, alone. But this time - when Regulus tricked her, and she stared at Bellatrix for hours, and her body tingled with every one of Greyback's rough touches - she wasn't prepared. As much as she wanted to forget what happened, her mind kept on replaying those moments.

Sirius knew that although the actual experience ended, Joanna was certainly traumatized. And they still had to fight a bloody wizarding war with his brother on the bad side. 'This isn't over' Sirius thought. As much as it pained him to see her in that state, he tried his best to comfort her.

"I get them sometimes, you know," he mentioned.

He opened up, "Not as much as before like when I was staying with your parents after I ran away, but I still get them."

She lifted her head off his shoulder, "What do you do?"

Without thinking much about it he stated, "I look at you."

She chuckled lightly, "Really?"

Sirius' cheeks reddened at his honest revelation, "Really. I know it sounds cheesy or creepy but I do. And when you're not around I try to focus on a happy memory of us or the boys - the way you do when you conjure a Patronus."

She remembered how much Sirius struggled when he went to stay with the Potters despite acting otherwise, "I'm sorry, Sirius."

Confused, he queried, "What for?"

"For your parents, your mother especially. I can't believe she did all those awful things to you," her tone full of disbelief.

An underlying sadness overtook Sirius' voice, "You see, not even my mother could renounce Voldemort for her own sons. Which is why I'm so thankful for you and the lot."

She stared into his eyes. He seemed to be deep in thought. This time she went in for the sweet kiss. Their lips melted into one another drawn to each other like gravity. Joanna felt her insides grow warm once again just like the first time she and Sirius kissed. Sirius certainly lived up to his reputation as the infamous Hogwarts heartthrob but he would never admit how flustered he was the first time, making a move on one of his best friends who also happened to be his other best friend's little sister. His suave was no match for her charm, but Sirius would never tell her that directly because on the outside he always played it cool (or so he thought).

He proceeded to hide the butterflies in his stomach, "I should go warm the kettle then, make us some tea. That sound good?"

Jo nodded and stood up accompanying her boyfriend to the kitchen counter while he did his best not to cause such a ruckus with the pots and pans in the middle of the night.