Jily Oneshots (pt2)

Three Swipes, You're Out

by twilightstargazer

Lily downloaded Tinder the night her sister got married.

It's not like- she was just drunk and lonely, okay? Which, she understands now is a pretty stupid reason, but she just watched her sister get married at twenty three, and excuse her for having a bit of an existential crisis just because she's twenty and hasn't had any type of fulfilling romantic relationship. It seemed like a good idea at the time even though she knows most people don't use Tinder for actual relationships, but like she said, she was drunk. Of course, she also tries to convince herself that she's just twenty; she doesn't even need to go out and find some sort of fulfilling romantic relationship because she's a strong, independent young woman who doesn't need a man to feel fulfilled in life.

(If anyone asks why she's arguing with herself over Tinder of all things, it's just because it's two in the morning and she's drunk, with mascara smudged around her eyes, struggling to unlock her phone because her fingers don't seem to work all of a sudden. Long story short, she's a mess.)

Still though, the whole scenario is pretty fucking stupid, and Mary and they don't stop taking the piss for almost two weeks.

In all honesty she doesn't really expect to actually use the app.

She does set up her profile- and by set up she just means adding whatever pictures she thinks she looks cute in, actual descriptions be damned- but that's about it.

Sometimes she might swipe through it when she's bored, but it's only because she's curious. She wants to see the kind of people the dating app thinks she'll be good with that's all.

No other reasons whatsoever.

It's been roughly two months since she's downloaded it, which is. Well, it's two months longer than she originally thought she would actually have it installed for, for one thing.

(Yes, she's a mess. She knows.)

Occasional swiping turns into regularly swiping- Mary makes her disapproval well known while Marlene sniggers in the background- and Lily would be lying if she said that she's never swiped right on anyone.

They all fell through though, and Lily's coming to the realisation that she's maybe a slight bit picky. Most of the people were... pretty normal and nice, but one guy did send a dick pic to which she tore him a new one about sending unauthorised nude pictures to unsuspecting girls before blocking and reporting him.

"You do realise that this wouldn't happen if you actually go outside and meet people, right?" says Mary, wrinkling her nose when Lily tells them about the dick pic sender. "Socialising, making a connection, maybe actually holding hands like us folk used to do in the olden day."

Marlene snorts. "Come of it, Mare. 'Holding hands?' Have we stepped back into the 1800s? Should I hide my ankles?"

"Look," says Lily, interrupting them both, "The way I see it, it's better I figure out who's going to send unsolicited dick pics now than going out there and 'making a connection,' only to have my heart broken by some prick who doesn't know what boundaries are. You don't want that to happen to me, right Mary?"

The other girl sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Say what you want, but let's not forget that I'm the only one here in an actual relationship," she reminds them while setting the table for dinner.

"Oh yes, Mary the relationship queen," Marlene rolls her eyes, handing out the cutlery, "Tell me, do you and Reg hold hands on a daily basis? Do you only do it at night under the covers?"

Mary throws a roll at her and Lily hides a grin in her soup when hits Marlene right on the nose. The other girl makes an undignified sound, but she still scoops it up and tears off a large hunk before unceremoniously shoving it in her mouth, much to Mary's chagrin.