Jily Oneshots (pt2)

The Difference

by abba2zabba15

Sixth year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry was drawing to a close, and James couldn't have been gladder to see it end. Well, that wasn't the complete truth.

Yes, James was thrilled to be on holiday. He loved leaving school as much as any of his fellow students, if not more than them. James was brilliant, it's true, but that doesn't mean that he didn't find school tedious and a waste of his time. James Potter was an arrogant boy, everyone knew that, and he rather thought that Hogwarts couldn't teach him much of anything.

James was glad to be leaving school, glad for a break from work and homework and a social life, even a little bit glad that he wouldn't have to plan any pranks for a while. But he was sad to leave his friends. Padfoot would be staying with him that summer, like he did every summer. The boys were best friends, but a better description of them would be brothers. James didn't even know many brothers that were as close as he and Sirius.

James was sad to be leaving Wormtail and Moony, because he wouldn't be seeing them every day of the summer. Though they would likely get together over the holiday, because that's what best friends do when they have time off.

Moony would be going off to the sea with his muggle parents. As far as James knew, he wasn't looking forward to it that much.

"I only go because I have to." He explained to the other Marauders a few weeks before term ended. "I really don't enjoy it. I don't like sitting on the sand in the hot sun, and I'm too bloody pale to get any kind of a tan. Honestly I just end up reading most of the time. But it's important for Mum and Dad to feel like they still have a connection to me. I can't really blame them for that, I mean, I'm the one that had to go and be different from them, right?"

James could see why Remus didn't like the beach. James didn't like it much either.

He was sad to be leaving Wormtail. Though Peter was the slowest of the lot and didn't really fit in with them, he was part of the group, and part of the friendship.

Yes, James was happy and sad about leaving this term, but the thing that was troubling him most of all was not his friends, or his exams, or his travel plans. The thing bugging him and causing him to come down to the lake today to think was Lily Evans.

She was the constant in his life that he really had no idea about. He didn't know what he was going to do around her, because she made him do all sorts of mad things. James knew that he would end up being a prat to her, because that's the thing he did best when he was nervous; be a prat. Sirius would tease him about it often.

Sirius didn't understand; he was a self-proclaimed bachelor for life. He says it's because he saw what his parents were like and he couldn't bear to risk inflicting that on another human being. He didn't want to be his father, and he didn't want to force any woman to become his mother.

But James knew what Lily Evans did to him. She drove him out of his mind, but he couldn't stay away from her. She was barmy, but extremely logical. She was hostile, but exceedingly kind (to everyone that wasn't him. He didn't blame her, he was awful to her). Lily Evans was a walking contradiction.

James had to come down to the lake because he had to think about Lily Evans. He needed a place to gather his thoughts without one of his git friends getting in the way.

Tomorrow was the last day of term and for some reason James felt like it was the end of something important. He felt like he needed to tell Lily something tomorrow, or he would never get the chance to say it. Unfortunately for him, he was either too thick, or he had suffered some serious brain injury, because he could not figure out what he needed to tell her.