nothing ever changes, xu minghao

52

song:
mood lamp - girls generation

TEMPERANCE, JUSTICE, STRENGTH

Blood Moon in 12 hours

Like poorly crocheted yarn that was tugged once, the group's plan was dwindling, falling apart easily. Only one mistake crashed the plan intricacies like a domino effect.

How unfortunate.

She was restless but could barely keep her eyes open as exhaustion was slowly taking over but she tried to fight it, worried that the moment she closed her eyes an opportunity to see Minghao would appear.

But from sores and bruises, Idalia could only fight her sleep for an hour or so more before her head dropped and dreamland clouded her worried thoughts.

Like anyone whose world has been flipped on its head, her dreams like psychosis took her to a place that was shining in the luxury of comfort that she hadn't felt ever.

It was warm and fear didn't linger as a side effect of the real world. Her subconscious created paradise inside her mind, a place where only solitude existed as blissful scenarios played like the best song she has ever heard on a loop.

Where she sat, everything was out of touch but it did not bother her because all her friends were around her, laughing, smiling, and engaging with one another as if they have always known each other.

Besides her was none other than the person she wished for the most in the real world. Without a scratch, bruise, or any pain lingering on him he sat comfortably, his hair striking black as always, and his signature rings were adorning the hand that was placed into hers.

She couldn't feel any callouses on his hands or the ridges of his rings as she looked at their interlocked hands, all she felt was warmth and that was enough to give her peace.

It was so weird how real and unreal it felt. There was no setting in her dream, her consciousness couldn't muster one. All it could do was place everyone important in her life, the ones she worried about in a white endless room beside her with happy expressions. And although it wasn't real and she knew it, the warmth it gave her was enough to where she didn't wake up.

But maybe her brain wasn't just trying to coax her worries, and instead, maybe it was trying to do damage control before darkness and cold would fill the room.

Almost like black ink, it began to rise but no one moved an inch, them all paralyzed in a cycle as only she tried to escape the ink, that at a rapid pace, filled what she thought was a void.

And one by one did their faces disappear under the liquid. She tried and tried to pull them, to get them to swim but they were dormant, and eventually, she was the only one left. With the pain of seeing everyone go and her being alone moments before the liquid came over her, she awoke from what was once restful but became restless so fast.

Because even in her dreams, happiness and bliss were only temporary. Temporary before another misfortune crashed onto her.

Panting, gasping for air, her body on fire, she's brought back into the cell where the cold brick relieves pain from the back of her head. But not relieving enough to ease her nightmare. It's unsettling.

Grimy and dark, she tended to her pounding heart by grasping at the matted straw, its needle-like texture centering herself. Even in the dim light, she looks down at her shirt, stains of hers and Minghao's blood, and she's not even sure how much is hers.