"Would You Love Me Now?" A RJ Mpreg AU

He had me tricked for sixteen months

A/N: Ricky is one month and one week along

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Ricky's POV:

Today, I'm exactly one month and a week pregnant. It's been a little over a month since our Valentine's day date. I don't know if I regret losing my virginity to someone who just got a lead acting role or not yet. It's also been a little over a week since I announced the pregnancy to EJ.

He's still thinking about his options though.

I have one of those pregnancy tracker apps on my phone and it's mainly telling information about female gestation but there is no app for men. So this will have to do.

It's so cool to see that my baby is the size of a little grain of rice right now.

The app is really cool and I wish I could share it with EJ but he still hasn't called or texted me back his response about being a dad.

Nini said to give him more time and not to push him to answer but I want an answer now.

I'm starting to think that he wants to break up with me, he's just to scared to say it because he knows that I'll cry.

If he breaks up with me, I'll probably go back to having my minor depressive episodes and that won't be good for the baby.

I wear an extra large hoodie to work so that the kid's I teach guitar and voice lessons to don't come up with assumptions even though I don't have a bump yet.

I need more extra large hoodies because the only thing I want to wear now is that pink blanket hoodie I wore to surprise EJ when I announced the pregnancy.

I don't want to wear it now because it reminds me of that day he told me he wanted a break.

Not a break up but a break.

"Hey Ricky, what are you looking at? You seem concentrated on circling something. You never read the newspaper, what's going on? Have you officially become a dad this early?" I see my best friend, Nini laughing at me by the door of our pre-school music room.

We teach toddlers and kids music while their parents are working since they are in lower class families and can't afford music classes for their little ones.

I can't wait to teach my little girl guitar.

I hope my baby is a girl.

I hope EJ wants a girl.

"I'm looking for a second job. I need more money if I'm eating and paying for two." I put the newspaper down on the front desk and reveal my pink cheeks and red puffy eyes and the blanket EJ bought for me last Valentine's day.

I get cold easily and use him to cuddle.

This is for me to cuddle with when he's not here with me.

I've been crying a lot lately.

It's the hormones in my body making me emotional and my past with depressive episodes coming back and the break EJ requested that we have and the baby.

It's a lot to talk about and my dad is in San Fransisco.

"Ricky, OMG, are you okay? Have you been crying for the last hour while I was teaching?" I watch her walk over and hug me from behind the desk chair I'm sitting at carefully while I cuddle myself with the blanket EJ got me.

"I'll be fine once I get a second job to take care of this little one." I point to my belly while sobbing into her cardigan over top music instrument dress that the pre-schoolers love.