"Would You Love Me Now?" A RJ Mpreg AU

Would you love me now?

A/N: Ricky is two months pregnant and 3 weeks pregnant = 11 weeks. One week later from the last chapter.

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Ricky's POV:

It's been a month and a few weeks since I last talked to or saw E.J.

I miss him everyday and my small bump is a reminder that I am carrying his baby.

I don't know if he considers us boyfriends anymore.

We've been on a break and I think he's just going to break up with me any moment and tell me he doesn't want the baby.

I'm not going to force him to talk to me or go visit him.

He can talk when he's ready.

I've tried to write text messages, emails, hand-written letters but I can never send them.

They are all drafts.

I have a whole drawer in my room full of all the incomplete hand-written letters that I tried to write to E.J asking him if he 'Would you love me now? If you saw my bump. And if he would love me now if I wasn't pregnant.

I have notes on my phone that are drafts of text messages I want to send to him but can't.

I even left him a sad voicemail and ended it saying "Would you love me now?" then broke down in tears in my hoodie.

I don't think he heard it though.

And also in that drawer is the sonogram picture of the little blob that's my baby the nurse took at my second appointment.

Our baby.

Dr. Mason says that I can get another sonogram and know the gender soon.

I wish EJ could be here to see these moments.

I'm giving him space like Nini said to and I'm not allowed on set in Hollywood after sneaking in his trailer with balloons and blanket hoodies.

My friends, Nini, Gini, and Big Red know about the pregnancy now and are my biggest supporters.

My dad supports me but he doesn't live nearby and his boyfriend aka Mr. Mazarra keeps checking on me for science stuff but it's the thought that counts.

I wish E.J cared about the baby and I.

I wish he would text me or call me or visit me.

I have a noticeable bump now and it's small.

It looks like I'm fat and gained a lot of weight from eating Mcdonald's.

I can't help it if the baby wants McDonald's.

I also wear XXL clothes now to hide my bump. I know that it's not a big bump yet but I am off of social media right now and have seen myself tagged in posts with E.J on Instagram and Tiktok.

I don't want look at twitter.

I love my baby more than anything or anyone now. I've learned to be cautious and some days I do eat salads for her.

The champagne I drank didn't hurt her. I even told Dr. Allen about my champagne mistake and he said not to drink again.

I still don't know the gender of my baby but I call the baby her instead of it.

"Hi, how can I help you?" I look up from bending down to get a price tag for the shirt I just folded.

Ever since, I rescheduled my mall trip to buy new clothes with Big Red, I got this part-time job at the Pasadena Mall, Hot Topic.