"Would You Love Me Now?" A RJ Mpreg AU

We kissed, but it felt different

A/N: Ricky is 2 months and 2 weeks pregnant. 10 weeks. I know it's confusing to keep track.

*************************

E.J's POV:

It's definitely been at least a month since I last talked or saw Ricky.

I feel like a jerk for keeping my secret that I hooked up with my ex in her trailer from him.

It's best for him not to know though.

For the sake of the baby and his mental health.

There's another rumor going around on Twitter that I hooked up with Anastasia and cheated on Ricky when the cast went out to dinner.

I hope he hasn't seen that rumor. He doesn't have twitter and we haven't been a public couple for that long since he asked me to come out on live in my trailer.

I mean, I know how to hide from paparazzi even though I am not that famous. We hid for a year privately off social media as a couple.

I can't even keep count of the days anymore.

I have early morning shoots and some days they last till 9 pm and others till midnight.

I feel really bad for snogging and almost cumming Stacey for the second time in our relationship if there even is one left.

I love Ricky more than anyone else.

I can't fathom the fact that he's pregnant with my baby.

I impregnated him and I'm an actor in Hollywood.

I need a drink or something to focus.

I cheated on the guy I got pregnant and I'm on a break with him because I asked for it.

This is all my fault.

I don't have time to order a Uber to Pasadena to talk to him though.

Stacey, I mean Anastasia Steele is my ex-girlfriend. She used to be the Secretary at my dad's law firm office in Utah until she started taking acting classes. I didn't know this side hobby of hers of course. I was the one who broke up with her after we dated for 3 years post my early homeschooling graduation. And then I decided to move to LA to become an actor and I broke her heart. Moving to LA meant that I had to put in the work in condom and toothpaste commercials shot at 1 am in junky studio lofts and hide from my agent that I was bisexual.

A job is a job in Hollywood.

Before I met Ricky, I was heartbroken about leaving Anastasia behind but happy to live out my California dreams.

I took Ubers from Hollywood to Pasadena to Santa Monica for auditions.

I even ran into the love of my life one day while I was heading to work in Pasadena one day.

A day I'll never forget.

I still love him but I cheated on him.

I don't know what I'm gonna do now.

I miss his hugs and voice and his cologne.

I miss his complaining and terrible driving but I have to be here to be the lead in this show and I cannot tell him that I just snogged and cummed my ex in her trailer.

I am an idiot.

"Hey man, you doing okay? Today's Amber and Issac's back of the car make out scene. You know you don't have to watch Anastasia shoot her scenes, right?" I hear Pearce's voice before I see him walk up from behind me in his tank top and shorts outfit for his character Jay who is a surfer guy in the show.