The Adventures of Nomi Darklighter

Chapter 64 - Conflicted

The next morning, Nomi woke up early. As she reached for Dash's side of the bed, she realized he wasn't there. He must have left some time ago because the sheets were cold. The young woman called him, but there was no answer.

Concerned, she quickly showered and dressed before heading to the kitchen. There she found Leebo who was busy preparing the bottles for the triplets.
"Where's my husband, Leebo?" She asked, leaning against the door frame.
The droid turned his attention to his partner's wife and locked his photoreceptor on her.
"I thought Lieutenant Rendar was still asleep, Captain Darklighter," Leebo replied in his mechanical voice. "Isn't he there?"
Nomi was having trouble staying calm.
"No, otherwise I wouldn't ask. He must have been gone for hours. Didn't he tell you where he was going?"
"No, Captain Darklighter," the droid replied, returning his attention to his work.
The Rogue Squadron pilot pondered and concluded that Dash couldn't be far if his droid was still there. Suddenly she had an idea where her husband could be.
"Please feed the little ones, I'll be back soon, Leebo," she said and left her quarters shortly afterwards.

Outside she was greeted by a murky sky and the usual mist of the nearby swamp.
She hoped that she was right with her guess and went to the clearing where Yoda's hut stood.
When she reached the clearing, she saw her husband sleeping under a tree. The young woman quietly approached Dash, but then she stepped on a branch and her husband woke up with a start. When he saw his wife, he smiled, rubbed his eyes and stretched.
"Good morning, darling," he said, sitting up.
"Good morning, Dash," Nomi replied, sitting down next to him. "Have you been here all night?"
Rendar nodded his head, leaned in and kissed her.
"I woke up in the middle of the night, tossed and turned and couldn't get back to sleep. Because I didn't want to wake you up, I got up and went here. You've told me so many times how calming this place is for you." He smiled and continued. "And as you can see, this place had the same effect on me."
"Didn't you think that after yesterday I'd worry about you if I wake up in the morning and you're not lying next to me?"
Her husband looked at her guiltily.
"No, to be honest," he replied, taking her in his arms. "But there was nothing to worry about. I would never leave you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you no matter how long or short it may be," he sighed. "I don't know why I was talking about breaking up yesterday. Maybe I was afraid that you would leave me and wanted to forestall you. That way, the
breakup wouldn't have hurt me so much. To be honest, I'm still conflicted about you becoming a Jedi."
Nomi put a finger over her husband's mouth.
"Please listen to me carefully, Dash. I am your wife and nothing can change that. Being a Jedi doesn't change my feelings for you. How many times do I have to tell you that I love you? For you I will always be the Nomi who I am now. I want you to finally understand this. Why are you so stubborn? You remind me of the Banthas back on Tatooine."
The young woman was starting to talk herself into a rage, but Dash pulled her even closer. He knew how to deal with his wife's temper.
"You look even more beautiful than usual when you're angry, Nomi," he said, kissing her and stroking her cheek.
Nomi calmed down under her husband's caresses.
"C'mon, Dash, let's go back. I'm sure you're hungry. I could eat at least half a Dewback," she said, wriggling out of her husband's embrace and standing up.
Rendar stood up as well, took his wife's hand and together they made their way back.

After breakfast, the two Rogue Squadron pilots went to the hangar for another simulator session. One by one the pilots entered the hangar where Wedge Antilles was already waiting for them. The commander hoped that the simulator session would have a better result than the first. This time he just watched as the squad members entered the simulator pods before entering the one he was leaning against.
As the simulation began, Nomi saw that it was the planned liberation of Coruscant again. Everyone did their best, but it wasn't enough and it ended just as disastrously as before.
Nomi Darklighter cursed loudly as she was hit and the monitor went dark. She opened the hatch and climbed out.
When she saw Wedge's expression, she knew she wasn't the only one who wasn't happy with the result.
The commander frowned, clenching and unclenching his fist. It was all too clear that he was struggling not to lose his temper. But then his anger and disappointment got the better of him.
"What's wrong with you?" He asked, glaring at the assembled pilots. "It wasn't the performance I'm used to from you. You have lost your fighting spirit. The long stay on this peaceful planet has made you all lazy and lethargic. If you keep this up, after the next fight I'll have to put together a new Rogue Squadron because you're all dead. We need a new mission to stay sharp and therefore I will speak with Admiral Ackbar...Dismissed."
The pilots left the hangar in groups and discussed the disastrous result of the simulator session and their commander's reprimand.
Some of them wondered if it wasn't too early to think about an attack on the capital planet.
Dash took his wife's hand as they walked back to their quarters.
"The simulation actually shows what we're going to face," he began, looking worriedly at his pregnant wife. "It won't just be the Coruscant Defense Fleet. If we defeated it in the simulation, we would see the inner defenses of the planet. As you know, I've been there. There are Golan-I and Golan-II defense platforms that are heavily armed. Not to mention the civilian skyhooks. It will be difficult to maneuver there and avoid civilian casualties."
"All the more reason to work on our performance, Dash," Nomi replied, squeezing her husband's hand.
They walked the rest of the way in silence, each lost in their own thoughts.

Back in their quarters, Nomi and Dash were finally able to care for their children. The three little boys crawled on the floor and explored their surroundings. Everything was very interesting for them. Now, at nine months, understandable syllables could sometimes be heard in their chatter. Watching the triplets brightened the couple's spirits.
Nomi looked at her husband, who picked Biggs up and lovingly tousled his son's brown curls.
"Don't we have wonderful sons, Nomi?" He asked with pride in his voice. "I never cease to be amazed by the miracle we created on a cold night on Hoth. I'm sure they'll be able to walk soon."
His wife laughed.
"Oh, I think this is going to take a while, Dash."
Biggs began protesting loudly because he wanted to get back to his brothers on the floor. Dash Jr. and Corran were busy using the Force to fly the X-wings and TIEs their father had
built, and Biggs wanted to join in. Dash put his son on the floor and immediately he crawled over to his brothers.
As Nomi watched her sons play, she envied their effortless use of the Force. It seemed so natural to them. Would it ever be like that for her?