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Truth In A Masquerade - Detailed Feedback

Intro:

This is detailed feedback for the 1st place winner of the Eclipse Awards Jungkook category, crimsonbrine. Truth In A Masquerade is an incredible story that hooked me from the very first word (not exaggerating). Featuring strong characters, an interesting world, and a captivating writing style, Truth In A Masquerade is one of my favorite stories I've ever read on Wattpad.

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Detailed Review

What Worked:

It would be a crime (haha... get it? Cause, y'know, court- sorry) to start this list with anything other than the characters. I am a character writer and reader; I enjoy characters above all else. I can forgive every other aspect of a story if the characters are good. The characters here are incredible, with our two leads, Jungkook and Iseul, having depth and distinct personalities. Their dynamic is realistic and makes me love them together. I said it in my initial judge review, but I'll say it here too: Jimin is Jimin so he's an automatic 10/10.

I also enjoy the way the characters are physically written. I don't mean their appearances, as much as I enjoy those too, I mean the way they carry themselves. Sometimes things as simple as a character's posture can tell you more than 100 words ever can. The characters have complex minds and actions that make them more engaging. For example, I loved how Jungkook had a little uwu moment over Iseul's laugh. It's like an upgraded version of baby Jungkook seeing Namjoon's thighs, and I adore it. I adore the way Jungkook carries himself, and his wits make him a likable character.

Beyond that, they're also relatable. They have struggles that define them. They have negative traits that balance them out and never make them feel bland. There's more to them than the surface, and I appreciate how the author took the time to flesh them out both through the dialogue and through their physical actions. The author does a great job mixing physicality with the spoken dialogue, which makes the story more engaging.

I'm still in shock that this author was worried about pacing. For example, the first chapter was fast but sharp. Right when we started moving too fast, the author pulled back and gave us a chance to process what had just happened. We get all this dialogue, then the text pulls back right before it becomes too much, giving us an insight to how the room feels. It gives us time to process the dialogue we just read. The author masterfully weaves the story together by giving us a lot, but never too much. The text always pulls back before it becomes overwhelming or too much, which makes the story feel more tense (in a good way) while also ensuring no one will ever get bored or overstimulated.

This is totally random, but I have read this story three times. Once for the Eclipse Awards, once to go leave comments, and once for this review. All three times, in the first chapter, I read Haut Monde as Haunt Mode. It gives me a laugh every time because my brain just doesn't want to brain. I don't know why I felt like bringing this up, but I just thought the author might get a kick out of the ✨Haunt Mode✨ my brain keeps seeing.

Editor Raven here: I read Haut Monde as Haunt Mode again while editing this chapter 💀💀💀

Back to regularly scheduled programming.

The worldbuilding is another subject worthy of praise. There wasn't a single thing I was confused about, and I love how immersive the world feels. The environments are described with unique word choice that makes me feel like I'm in the room with the characters. The author uses the five senses to describe the world, which is rare. I don't see many authors who incorporate the five senses into their description, and I wish more authors would because it's so detailed and vivid.

Another thing I want to talk about is tense. I do a lot of judging. I judge for a few awards outside of my own, which means I'm judging anywhere from 15-30 stories a week. The two most common errors are dialogue tags and tense issues. Those two issues are in almost every story, and I'm not exaggerating. I don't think I've ever given anyone a perfect grammar score out of all the stories I've judged, and 95% of the time it's because an author does those two things wrong while the rest is great.