When it gets complicated

Soo vs Kai (Kaisoo)

~Kyungsoo~

The sound of oddly pleasant chirping greets me as I'm pulled out of my pleasant slumber. The fog lifts from my brain and my dreams, still existing on the edge of my subconscious, fade away. I feel my limbs starting to stretch out and feel around before i even process what they're searching for. When my right hand connects to a soft, warm surface, i know they found it.

My hand, on its own validation, slides down the smooth area, feeling every hard plain, tight and sculpted. The gods clearly gifted it to this earth to be marveled. To be revered. Perfection personified, and he's in my bed.

Too lost in enjoying the moment, i almost miss the amused sounding hum... Almost.

My eyes snap open and my lip sucks safely into my mouth at finding Jongin's eyes open, watching me carefully. It makes me want to shy away, but instead i push myself to be daring.

I lean in and seize Jongin's lips, then pull back to gage his response. He stares at me a bit caught off guard, but doesn't seem upset. I decide to play with fire and lean back in pressing our lips together, this time separating my lips quickly and pulling his bottom lip into my mouth, marching my way through his surprise until i get a reaction. It starts slow, Jongin still edging on his caution, before i feel him react properly. He moves closer, deepening the kiss and hungrily pushing his tongue into my mouth.

A deep, low moan pulls out of my throat. It only encourages him, and i soon find a large, sure hand fitting across my ass. My thin briefs allowing for the awareness of every single digit fitting across the swell, squeezing a good handful. I gasp and my hips move forward on their own validation, which forces Jongin to pull away. I chase him, but he refuses to give me what I want. He takes a deep, struggled breath as he rests his forehead against mine, and our ragged breathing echoes through the room.

"Jongin..." i start, about to make my case once again, but he stops me before I can.

"You have so many stuffed animals in here." He mentions, staring over my shoulder.

A sigh falls from my lips and i lean away from him. He's been doing this for over a week now. Any time we get further than an innocent kiss, or even a small taste of something heavier, he breaks away and clouds the moment. Like now, when he's looking at me with that boyish smile that made me fall for him to begin with and awaits my answer, i can't even bring myself to be upset about it.

I shake my head and let my hand move up his chest and deliver a vengeful tweak to his nipple. Jongin yelps and gives me a wide eyed, yet amused expression. The little shit, he knows exactly what he's doing.

"Don't question my children. This was their bed before you started crashing." I state.

Jongin mocks offense and then pouts. "Well fine. If your children are more important."

He scoots away and makes a move like he's going to get up, and panic seizes me. I grab at his arm and he pauses, looking at me with a questioning gaze, as if waiting. Like this is an actual test. I know it's in a kidding way, but something about this moment makes my heart shutter. The thought that my next choice could make or break his presence in my bed feels way too heavy in my chest. Why is it so hard to breathe?

Jongin's brows furrow and he places a hand over mine, still frantically holding onto him. I know he doesn't miss the tremble that vibrates down my arm.

"What's wrong?" Jongin asks, his voice laced with concern. It only makes my chest tighten further.

"I don't... I'm scared that I'll make the wrong move and you'll disappear again." I admit, taking a bit of my own advice and being honest about my feelings.