to all the glowing eyes ✎ joshler

october 16

will;

i've began to analyze my options. i looked up some towns near mine that i can run away to. they all seem so lovely, although i have 3 main choices.

i also looked up jobs there. most of them are as waiters or party places.

as you can see, my sources of income are going to be really limited.

the public high school there apparently has a good education system. that's all i need.

i'm going to die alone.
no one loves me. and even if someone did, they would leave me.

i'd just be nothing but a useless toy, a stupid diversion that they get bored of soon after.

sure, i might find someone eventually, but that doesn't mean they can't leave. they will. they will recognize what a mistake they have made and leave me broken and messed up.

all i want is for someone to stay for once.

someone to care about me and always be there for me. not just be there for a few minutes and then leave because they are now annoyed.

love is so much to ask for.

i'm sorry.

i feel so worthless and stupid.

t.r.j.

„"„

every day, josh's heart hurts more and more with each word. he really needs to talk to tyler.

he wants to speak with the pretty boy with doe like eyes that makes his heart oh so happy and can get him to feel oh so sad in a matter of seconds.

he wants to have a wholesome chat with his new crush.

{🌹💌🌹}

well, as of right now, i'm crying and hurting. i hate the world and no one i love seems to enjoy my presence right now

someone i care about so much and love with all my being has left me and i can't bring myself to think positively.

my heart physically hurts

-alaska