to all the glowing eyes ✎ joshler

december 12

josh wakes up with a headache. his eyes feel so puffy and dry. he tries to stretch to get himself out of bed but he feels a presence hugging him from behind. he looks down at the arms around his waist, only to realize it's brendon.

he can't help but smile at this sight. he appreciates how considerate and kind his friend is. after last night, a hug and a shoulder to cry on was something he really needed. slowly, he gets out of brendon's arms and sits up. he rubs the sleep off his eyes, his stomach rumbling for food.

not even 5 seconds pass after he gets off the bed to grab some oreos when brendon wakes up. he yawns, somehow still tired after sleeping a full 9 hours. "morning, b," josh smiles at him, offering an oreo.

brendon takes it and smiles back, "someone's feeling better."

"yeah. i needed that cry last night. thanks for that, by the way. i really appreciate it."

"don't worry about it. it's my pleasure," he winks and takes a bite out of the holiday themed cookie. brendon can't be any happier, he likes seeing josh happy. that's more than clear by now. oh the things he would do for him. his sleepy mind is already thinking of things his wide awake one wouldn't even dare to think about in a million years.

"you're the best friend i could ever ask for."

this hits brendon like a cold bath with ice cubes in it. of course... that's not a possibility. why would he even be thinking about it? he is well aware that what he's feeling isn't allowed. he fakes a smile, pushing down the need to cry. "and you are mine."

„"„

josh checks their gps. the next city is almost 4 hours away. they chose a route that best avoids going back through their city, mainly to not get caught by josh's parents or any of their friends. brendon finishes loading up the bags into the back of the car and closes the trunk. "okay, i think we're good to go. unless you wanna go for a quick coffee run."

"you really need to chill about that. i saw you drink two of those espresso drinks while i changed," josh says as he gets in the car, shivering due to the incoming cold.

the taller boy joins him, putting the keys in the ignition and turning on the heater. "c'mon. i'll ask for a decaf. pretty please? may we go get some coffee, joshie?" he does puppy eyes at his friend; he's fully aware that it's one of his weaknesses.

"fine. and don't call me that. hearing it from you is weird," josh chuckles. there was a time where brendon only called him that and he enjoyed it, but that was also the time when they made out every chance they got to.

"you're weird."

"we both are. now shut up and drive before i change my mind and force you to only drink water for the rest of the trip."

brendon fakes a moan and bites his lip, "oh yes. make me wet, papa."

josh's face goes red and covers his face with his hands. "i can't fucking believe you said that. you're disgusting. and horny. and a mess."

"yet you love me anyways."

he's right. after all these years of being friends, after all the dirty jokes and forbidden kisses, he still loves him. yeah, he likes his other friends, but nothing beats the real thing. who would he be without brendon? the only thing he knows is that he would be a very different person.

„"„

by the time they arrive to akron, they're exhausted from driving. all they see is road for miles and miles. playing the 20 questions game got old after the first few rounds. josh just resigns to look out the window, listening to the music from the chill playlist brendon put on. well, not really chill, more so a soft sadness. by the time the first notes of josh's favorite the 1975 song play, brendon realizes his mistake.