best of times

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"male, thirty-eight, gun shot to the chest, b.p. is dropping!" a doctor shouted, running into the emergency room.

"get him to an o.r. sat!" john shouted, chasing after the stretcher. sometimes he wondered why he decided to go back into surgery. the long hours, facing death every, it was just too much for him. when he walked in to the scrub room, the nurses told him he couldn't go into the o.r. "what do you mean i'm off the case?" he asked.

"john," the chief of surgery said. "you can't operate on the patient." 

"why not?"

the chief sighed. "you just can't, i'm not telling you why."

"we're loosing him, jackson." another doctor said, popping his head into the wash room.

the chief sighed and walked back into the operating room. john looked though the windows, but a nurse closed the blinds so he couldn't see. john took his scrubs off and went out to the hallway, checking the files. sherlock was shot in the chest, millimeter away from his major heart artery, brought in ten minutes ago, and things weren't looking too good for him. john put the file back in the wall holder and walked slowly to the nurses station, sitting down in one of the chairs and waiting for someone to get him.

"john," mike said softly. "he's in room 147."

"okay, yeah, thanks." john got up and started walking down the corridor. it's been three hours since sherlock went into surgery. mike didn't say anything about how it went or if sherlock was awake or not. he just had to find out for himself. he almost lost it when he walked into the room, he had a tube down his throat, he was on bypass. a nurse was in there, but she left once she saw john walk in. he pulled a chair closer to his bed and grabbed the chart from the end of the bed.

"i told you not to go on that case alone." john said like sherlock could hear him. "you did, and look where that got you," john lightly laughed. he put the medical chart back on the end of the bed and held sherlock's hand. "you've got such a massive brain, but i swear sherlock you are the biggest idiot out there. i'm going to talk to greg about letting you of by yourself because this is the second time, and i don't want this happening anymore. or i just might start at the clinic again and go on cases with you. but i'm not going to do that, so you're a lucky man at the moment."

sherlock got better over the next couple of days, they took him off of bypass and keeping a very close look on his heart.  john ate lunch in his room everyday and talked to him. mycroft, greg, mrs hudson, and mr and mrs holmes were the only ones allowed to visit. rules from the british government himself. john was just happy his in laws weren't staying at the flat and at a hotel close to bart's.

"it's been a week sherlock and i miss screaming at you for putting human parts in the fridge. and in the microwave. and the oven, and any where they don't belong. i just really miss you and your family is driving me insane, don't get me wrong they're nice and all, but they're always at the flat making sure everything is cleaned up for when you come back home. now i know what you mean about them always being in you personal space."

"what did i tell you?" sherlock quietly muttered.

john stood up. "oh my god! you're awake!" he said happily and smiled down at sherlock. "how are you feeling?" he asked and sat back down.

"pain." he said and reached for the morphine.

"hands off." john said sternly.

sherlock frowned and put his hand over his chest. "i heard everything you said." he said and clenched his gown where his heart was.

"you alright?"

"no," sherlock said strained. his heart rate started to go up and the next thing john knew, he wasn't breathing. 

"code blue!" john shouted and pressed the button. nurses started filling the room and the chief came in, pulling john out of the room. he closed the door and left john standing in the hallway, broken. sherlock was just talking and then, bam, he stopped breathing. it looked like he had a heart attack, but john wasn't sure. after five minutes, they were rolling sherlock out of his room and to surgery.

"go home watson, you don't need to be here for this." jackson said.

"i do, he's my husband." john said.

"no. go home. go somewhere, just leave the hospital, i don't want to see you until tomorrow."

"but what about when sherlock gets out of surgery?"

"we have to keep him in the icu."

"why?" john asked, voice filling with panic and worry.

"i'll tell you in the morning."

"tell me now!" john yelled.

jackon's pager went off. "go home." he said before running down the corridor.

after an hour, john left. he went to the pub and just sat at the bar, starring at a beer, wondering if he should drink it or not. two hours later, greg came and got john taking him to his flat for the night. john just laid on his couch and stared at the floor, not moving or anything. he just laid there, thinking of what he would do if sherlock had died and he wouldn't know until the morning. he was just freaking himself out, and it made him worse about the situation. greg tried him to get him to eat dinner, but john refused. greg set the plate on the coffee table in front of john, encase he did and then went back to the yard.

in the morning, john went to the hospital right when he woke up. he went to the icu and saw sherlock. he wasn't attached to any machine or breathing tube, which was good, but he was still in the icu under nurse watch. he left and went to find jackson.

"what happened to sherlock?" john asked.

jackson sighed and looked at john. "his heart started bleeding and then he had a heart attack. we lost him twice on the table, but he should be fine now, we stopped all the bleeding. you've got a fighter john."

john sighed in relief, that sherlock was going to be okay. "thanks, jackson." john said and turned around, going back to sherlock's room.

sherlock was awake when he got back. "turns out i actually have a heart." sherlock joked.

john smiled and laughed a little bit, making sherlock smile. "i'm glad you're okay." john said and sat next to sherlock's bed. "you're not allowed on cases for the next two months."

"that's not fair!" sherlock whined.

"you died three times yesterday, i think it's fair."

"what if i don't leave the flat?"

"we'll talk about it."

"you're going to have to entertain me for two months then, and sex is out of the question." sherlock said.

"damn it," john sighed and rubbed his face.

sherlock laughed lightly. "you should go back to work."

"my rounds don't start until noon, so you're stuck with my for the next five hours."

sherlock gave john a look. "no pampering me. i'm fine."

john smiled, "we'll see about that."

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