THE UNLOVED HUSBAND

CHAPTER FIVE: HIS NOTES

Bismillah.

Zayn Malik (picture above) as Harun Basil

Chapter Five: His Notes

Fatima's POV

What were the chances of seeing your ex – boyfriend again? I sometimes ask that question to myself. I told myself that the next time I see Harun, I would smile at him and make him realized what he just lost, what he let slipped away. He will see me happier than I have ever been. I would be ready for him.

But seven months have passed and yet, out of all places, out of all times, I see him in three long paces away from me, also in the same line as I am in, and will be riding the same flight with me and my arrogant weird boss. I shook my head.

I really really hate this ya Allah! But alhamdulillah, they are right behind us so I wouldn't need to see the sight of him and her, together. 

I looked down at my shiny red doll shoes and without a warning, a memory popped into my head.

FLASBACK

Harun and I were having ice cream in my favorite ice cream parlor. He kept glancing at me uncomfortably until I couldn't take it anymore.

"Hey, is there something wrong?" I asked him, while I pinpointed the spoon at him, playfully, with a silly smile on my face.

He liked my silly side, he told me that once while we were photocopying files few months ago.

Harun sat up straight and placed the spoon on the small plate.

"How come you never wear light colors? I mean, don't get me wrong. It's just that today you're all brown and black and gray. Gray veil, black abaya and brown shoes. They aren't even complimentary," he said a bit seriously.

That sent a sting in my heart. I felt conscious and ... ugly. Is he embarrassed by what I was wearing? Is that the reason why he never brings me to fancy restaurants or even introduce me to his family?

"Uhm, you know that in Islam, the black color is recommended, or white. I mean even Aisha (r.a)..." I started to explain but he nod and looked away, as if annoyed by my presence or by my answer.

"Didn't the Rasulullah (s.a.w) also said to wear good beautiful clothes, since it will also show that we are blessed by Allah, as long as we don't go overboard," he explained impatiently.

"I guess you're right, I'm sorry," I said.

But what I really wanted to say was...

"I'm sorry love. I'm sorry Honey. I'm sorry Darling. I'm sorry Sweetheart."

But now, Harun never liked the endearment. He said it will only make Allah angry at us, since we shouldn't really be in a girlfriend – boyfriend relationship in the first place.

I still don't know if Harun is sincerely religious or something else.

"I think we should go home now. I don't want to miss Mahgrib prayer," I said, changing the topic.

I made a move to stand up but he touched my hand. I removed my hand right away, on impulse. Yes, Harun and I have been seeing each other for two years but we were never intimate, no kisses, no hugs, no touching, nothing. The first time he tried to kiss me, I totally freaked out and left him at the faculty lounge. Although it was lock, it still didn't feel right. I was ashamed of Allah. So Ieft without even thinking twice.