Adopted by Phan

Chapter 115- Alt. Ending 2 Part 1

"No. Please."

Phil's P.O.V.

Dan and I stood back, Phoenix clutched in my arms and Dan frozen where he stood, unable to move with silent tears streaming down his cheeks. I knew I was crying too but I couldn't bring myself to think about it, I just wanted Jay to be okay.

A nurse came to my side and pulled us back, out of the way of the doctors as they rushed backwards and forwards with machine and what ever else they were holding, as I couldn't see through the tears of fear.

Dan clung to my hand, burying his head into my shoulder and covering his ears with his hands, trying not to listen to what was going on. I tried to look away too, resting my head on top of Dan's, supporting Phoenix as best as I could and desperately trying to block out the yelling from the doctors and nurses.

"Come on! Keep going! Keep the CPR going!" I heard that loud and clear, the doctor almost screaming it so everyone in the room could hear him. "Don't give up on us here kid, come on!"

I heard a heaving sob from Dan and I just buried his head further into my shoulder, clinging to me as well as Phoenix. In my head I was praying, praying to every goddamn god that ever existed to spare her life and let her come home.

"Heartbeat detected! Come on, get her stable!" I could hear Dan mummering into my shoulder, his fists clenched around the fabric of my shirt.

Phoenix, none too pleased with the yelling, started his quiet high-pitched wail of displeasure, wanting attention and possibly another bottle but Dan and I mostly ignored him, our attention focused entirely on Jay. Her heartbeat was completely sporadic, picking up and then falling away every few seconds as the doctors tried desperately to stabilize her.

I kept my head down, listening to the irregular heart monitor as it picked up then dropped almost completely, coming back in full force again. My heart picked up hopefully as the monitor beeped in a steady rhythm for a few seconds and I looked around, seeing the doctors pulling away from her bed with hopeful looks on their faces.

"Has she- is it stabilized?" One of the nurses looked around at the still stable monitor and paused for a second, as if she expected the beeping to stop at any second and I knew she had a good reason too.

"We can hope, she seems to be holding up herself but it could go anywhere from here." I nodded, rocking Dan a little bit. He hadn't seemed to recognise that Jay was stable, still mumbling under his breath, off in his own little world.

"Dan. Dan? Dan, she's okay." He looked up, his chocolate brown eyes filled with tears and rimmed red from the previous tears that had fallen.

"Are you sure?" I paused but shook my head, knowing there was no point in trying to lie to him.

"We don't know for sure... but it's looking up."

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Three days later and nothing had changed. No movement, no change in her heartrate, no nothing.

The doctors said that she was in a coma and wouldn't likely wake up for a few days at least and that we just had to hold out hope for the best when she did eventually awaken. According to them, the chances of her not waking were so slim that it wasn't even a full percentage, so we shouldn't bother ourselves worrying about that outcome. Instead, we should be more worried about what damage the water did and having been dead for at least 5 minutes would do to her.

Brain damage, memory loss, paralysis, loss of motor functions like being unable to speak and if that wasn't enough we also had to deal with everything else. The previous PTSD and anxiety, depression and, what worried me the most, it was possible that she could attempt suicide again.

She could feel guilt or anger, she could completely shut down or shut Dan and I out and we could lose all of the progress that we had made prior. She could turn to self-harm. The possibilities were endless but Dan and I had talked and we were prepared to deal with them as they came, with the help of some professionals obviously.

But we were going to be there. We weren't giving up on her, even though she might have given up on herself, we were ready and we were going to fight to get her back.

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It was early morning when we first noticed the changes. It was far too early for us to normally be up but Phoenix had woken us up by screaming his head off for a bottle and Dan and I didn't want to go back to sleep once he did, so we just sat beside Jay's bed in silence with Phoenix in my arms.

Dan noticed first. I was preoccupied with keeping Phoenix asleep and wasn't looking up but I startled when Dan leapt out of his chair and reached out for Jay's hand with no explanation. He looked back at me with wide eyes.

"Her fingers moved. I swear, I saw them!" I stood up then too, coming closer to her bedside with Phoenix in my arms. At first I didn't believe him and thought it must have been his eyes deceiving him and as the seconds passed I convinced myself that I was right when I saw it too.

"There! She did it again, look!" I saw several of her fingers rise and fall on the bed, twitching for a few seconds before falling still again. I reached across the bed and pressed the button to call for the nurse, hoping and praying that it wasn't just a one or two time thing.

"Jesus Jay, please say this is for real." The nurse rushed into the room looking frazzled, a frown on her face. "She's waking up."

The frown faded and it was replaced by a shy smile, her eyes lighting up with hope as she realised that we weren't kidding.

"Good. It's about time that we got some response and it'll only get better from here okay." I nodded and smiled, glad to have some sort of reassurance. "You'll just have to wait."

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Two days later and things had been steadily getting better. Jay was awake, just, and very hazy and uncertain of what was going on, not knowing that we were there or where she was. It worried us, but the nurses said it would take a few days before she actually came to her senses and the pain medication would wear off, bringing her back a little more.

We had been camping out at the hospital ever since she had been admitted, on a tiny camp bed that barely fit the two of us and a box lined with a mattress for Phoenix. It wasn't the most comfortable for anyone but we would rather die than leave Jay there alone so we stuck it out, and I made up for the uncomfortable furniture by hogging several blankets and cuddling Dan at night for body heat and comfort.

Jay slept most of the time, only stirring every 4 or 5 hours and even then I wouldn't say she was awake, simply not asleep.

The first time she spoke was almost a week after her attempted suicide. Dan and I were resting silently in her room, Dan's head on my shoulder and Phoenix fast asleep in my arms and an air of sadness hanging around. I wasn't sure where we could go next, but she gave me the answer.

"Ph-Phil?" Her voice was rough and dry, almost cracking because of how long she had been without both drinking and talking. I smiled at her, trying not disturb Dan or Phoenix.

"Hey Jay, just- uhhh, just stay still for a minute, I'll get a nurs-" She shook her head rapidly, wincing as she did so and bringing her hand up to her head in pain.

"Nuh uh, no nurse." She coughed at the end of the sentence, the cough sounding particularly painful and full of phlegm. I stood, resting Dan's head on the chair and placing Phoenix back in his box, where he continued to sleep. I perched myself on her bed and reached out my hand, squeezing hers gently.

"Are you okay?" She sighed.

"There's no point in trying to lie to you. No."