➳ jerrie tumblr oneshots

To Rest My Cheek To

"Surprise girls night!" Perrie says brightly as soon as Jesy opens the door.
"Oh my god," Jesy says in an American accent. "We haven't had girls night in forever."
"Oh my god," Perrie says back.
She steps past Jesy and inside the warm flat; it's been rainy and cold for the past week, and Perrie feels like a wooly mammoth wandering around in her overcoat. She's surprised she can even fit through the bloody door, given that she's eight months pregnant but feels more like eleven. She's not sure how she can get even bigger without physically bursting.
"Me and Jake did have a date night planned," Jesy says, "but it was just to watch a movie here at home, so the more the merrier."
"Kinky." Perrie leers, and Jesy leers back.
"Where's Jade?" Jesy asks, following Perrie as she waddles to the kitchen. Perrie rifles through the cupboards until she finds the half-empty box of Wagon Wheels she left last weekend.
"She's gone to her mum's," Perrie says. She's so hungry all the time. Hungry and tired and cranky. Somebody should have told her that being pregnant would make her feel like a gigantic toddler.
Just thinking about the size of her stomach makes her lay a hand flat across it.
"Is the baby kicking?" Jesy asks excitedly, already crowding in close to lay her hands on Perrie's stomach.
"No, get off," Perrie says, but she lets Jesy run her hands all over her stomach all the same. "Anyway, Jade's mum's been feeling a bit poorly, and Jade wanted to go play nurse for the weekend."
"Are you too big to fit on the train?" Jesy asks with a wicked smile, and darts away when Perrie weakly slaps at her arm. "I'm joking, obviously you're still well fit."
"Liar," Perrie grumbles, but she still preens a bit, then stuffs another Wagon Wheel into her mouth. "Where's my favorite fiance of yours?"
"He's out at Tesco's buying snacks," Jesy says. "I'll text him and tell him to get more."
"I love you," Perrie says sincerely. She sneaks a peak at her own phone as Jesy furiously texts; Jade's sent her a message.
home is boorrringg
at jesys, Perrie sends back.
whats boring?
ive watched hours of TOWIE, Jade sends, then a row of frowny faces. mums proper obsessed.im going to die watching TOWIE probably.
Perrie sends back a row of skull and crossbones, followed by a happy ghost.
fat lot of help you are, Jade sends instantly. Perrie can perfectly imagine the grumpy, scrunched face she's probably making right now; Perrie smiles just thinking about it.
"Stop," Jesy says, throwing a tea towel at her. "You're making your gross Jade face."
"I don't even know what that means," Perrie says. Jesy makes an exaggerated swooning-face, clasping her hands together and sighing while she does so. Perrie can't help but laugh.
"You're just as bad," she says, chucking the tea towel back at Jesy. "All we have to do is say Jake's name and you look like you're imagining what you want to do to him in bed."
"That's because I am," Jesy says smugly. "We bought this new toy the other day-"
"Stop," Perrie shrieks, covering her ears. "I'm an innocent little lamb, I won't let you corrupt me."
"I used to share a flat with you," Jesy says. "I know exactly how innocent you're not."
"Lies and slander," Perrie says, then she burps. Jesy bursts out laughing.
"Classy," Jesy says.
"I can't help it," Perrie whines. "Everything gives me heartburn." She still stuffs another biscuit into her mouth; no need to waste them.
"Come on, then, let's choose a movie," Jesy says. She grabs at Perrie's arm and pulls her into the living room, and Perrie lets herself be dragged.
She loves Jesy's flat. Jade's always making sure things get put in their proper place at home, but Jesy and Jake let the clutter pile up anywhere and everywhere. There's a cluster of ugly clown figurines on the mantle, a mound of blankets heaped on the pouf, and a small collection of tea mugs on the table. It's a right tip, in all honesty, but it's exactly how Jesy was when she lived with Perrie, so Perrie always feels right at home.
She lets herself down onto the sofa with a long sigh.
"How you doing, love?" Jesy asks, perching next to her.
"Good," Perrie says brightly. It's not a lie, exactly. It's a half-lie. It's a full lie, actually, but Perrie doesn't much feel like dealing with the crushing doubt that's threatening to overwhelm her at this particular moment, so she only smiles sunnily at Jesy.
"Good," Jesy says firmly, then, "Oh, there's this horror movie I've been meaning to watch, let's pop that in."
"I'm going to pee meself," Perrie tells her. "I'm going to get scared and then wee all over your sofa."
"You'll be fine," Jesy says, already switching the movie on.
Perrie sighs, but settles in to watch it all the same. It's better than sitting by herself in bed and missing Jade and feeling generally terrible.
-
Perrie doesn't pee herself, but every time she jumps the baby kicks at her ribs. By the time Jake makes it home and Leigh-Anne's dropped by, Perrie's firmly hiding her face in Jesy's shoulder so she doesn't have to look at the telly.
"Is the little ghost child gone?" she asks as Leigh-Anne drops on the sofa to sit next to her.
"There's more than one now," Leigh reports. She runs a quick hand through Perrie's hair. "Best not to look up yet."
"I hate you," Perrie tells Jesy's shoulder.
"Let's watch Spice World next," Leigh-Anne says.
"Not without Jade," Perrie says, sitting up. "She's Baby Spice, she has to watch it with us."
"Who am I?" Leigh asks.
"Who am I?" Jake asks immediately after.
"Obviously you're Sporty," Jesy says. "Honestly, babe, you don't even need to ask."
"Jesy's Scary Spice," Leigh-Anne proclaims. "And I'm Ginger, which leaves Perrie as-"
"Posh!" Jesy crows. "You're Posh, no getting around it."
Perrie screws up her face and sticks out her tongue. "I get to marry David Beckham," she says. "I win at life."
"I'm telling Jade you said that," Leigh-Anne says, and Perrie pretends to push her off the sofa.
"Put it on," Jesy demands, and Jake rolls his eyes but pops Spice World in anyway.
"I'm texting Jade about this right now," Perrie says, getting out her phone. "She'll want to know how quickly she's forgotten."
Leigh-Anne grabs her phone away before she can do anything. "Have you got nudes on here?"
"I'd never," Perrie says, aghast, just as Jesy crows, "I've seen them!"
"You traitor," Perrie says, slapping lightly at Jesy's arm. "You said you'd never tell about those."
Jesy waggles her eyebrows. "You looked proper sexy," she leers.
"You scarlet woman," Leigh-Anne cries in a posh accent. "I can't be seen with the likes of you."
"Alright, alright, put the movie on," Perrie says loudly.
"Now who's forgotten Jade?" Jesy asks smartly.
Perrie haughtily ignores her and settles back against the sofa. The baby kicks again, and Perrie makes a face; nobody told her that baby feet would feel like being stabbed with a rusty knife.
There's a lot of things she doesn't know about babies. She absently rubs at her stomach, and tries not to think about the fact that in one more month she's going to take home a real, live baby. It seems so strange, that after all the planning that she and Jade have done, and all the doctors visits just to get pregnant and all the stress of figuring everything out, she's actually going to be a mum. She and Jade are going to be mums.
Perrie doesn't want to fuck up.
"Should I wear the little black dress, the little black dress, or the little black dress," Leigh-Anne's saying as the movie starts up.
"That's my line," Perrie cries, shoving all her morose thoughts right out her head. Best not to dwell on those, she tells herself firmly.
After Spice World is over Jesy insists on putting Clueless in. Perrie makes it all the way to Cher burning the biscuits before she suddenly feels dead tired, and she lets Jake guide her to the guestroom with only a few yawned protests. She's asleep before Jake can even turn the light off.
-
Perrie wakes up slowly, vaguely aware that there's something shifting around near her. When she manages to crack her eyes open she sees that it's Jesy, settling on the bed at Perrie's feet.
"There's a Jesy on my feet," she says muzzily.
"There's a Pezza on my guest bed," Jesy says warmly. "Sleep well, love?"
Perrie yawns and stretches, feeling grungy in her clothes from yesterday. "I had to wee about fifteen times. What are you doing today?"
"Jake's been called in to work," Jesy says, tucking her feet underneath herself. "I've got no plans."
"You're hanging out with me," Perrie says imperiously. "I've got to buy a pram, that was Jade's assignment for me while she was gone."
"We'll call Leigh-Anne, and it'll be a surprise girls weekend," Jesy says.
"Oh, Jade'll be sad she missed it," Perrie says. Her phone is on the side table, but reaching over her big stomach to get to it seems like too much of a hassle. "Get me my phone so I can see if she rang?"
Jesy sighs, but still leans forward to fetch the phone for her. Perrie beams, then checks her messages. Jade did ring her early this morning, but didn't leave a voicemail. Perrie can call her back later.
Jesy brings her some toast with jam, and rings Leigh-Anne to demand that she stop by Perrie and Jade's flat to get Perrie some clothes before coming over, then curls up next to Perrie to braid her hair. It's nice and relaxing, in a way that Perrie hasn't felt in awhile. Everything at home lately has been about building cribs and washing Baby Grows and looking up diaper bins. It's not like Perrie can forget that she's pregnant, but she can pretend for one morning that she doesn't have any duties to get done.
Eventually she texts Jade a chirpy, good morning darling, and Jade instantly replies with a row of smileys and hearts. you rang?
mum wanted to know if u want the china.
Perrie definitely does not want any of Jade's mum's china. She and Jade have absolutely no use for it, and she's pretty sure the set Jade's talking about has decorative pineapples on it. She takes a silly picture of her face and sends it on instead of giving an answer.
thats what i said, Jade replies cheekily, how's things?
still at jesys, Perrie says. she brought me breakfast in bed, its like a spa day.
wish i were there, Jade sends back. i could paint your nails.
It's stupid how much Perrie can miss Jade after only one day. She says as much to Jesy, who only rolls her eyes and goes back to looking at her tablet.
paint them next weekend, Perrie suggests. Jade sends back a kiss and a monkey, which Perrie takes as a yes and an I can't talk more because mum needs me.
"Jade had to go," Perrie whines, poking at Jesy with her toes. "Entertain me."
"No," Jesy says, then sticks her tongue out at Perrie.
Perrie shifts around, trying to get comfortable; it's hard to do these days since the baby's always pressing against something inside of her.
"Have you and Jake talked about kids?" Perrie asks. Jesy looks at her for a long minute, then sets her tablet aside.
"We've talked about it," she admits. Perrie snuggles into her side, and Jesy wraps an arm around her. "But we've both decided that it's not for us, we think."
"No?" Perrie asks. "No little Nelson-Roche's running around, terrorizing everybody?"
"My children would be angels," Jesy says in fake outrage. "But no. Don't get me wrong, we love them. Your little boy is going to be spoiled rotten, you know that. But I think that we love having our freedom a bit more than that."
Perrie sighs. "Good for you," she says.
"Yeah?" Jesy asks, tipping her face down to look at Perrie. "You're not baby crazy now, insisting that everybody get pregnant with you?"
"God, no," Perrie says. "Then all the attention wouldn't be on me. It'd be horrible."
Jesy laughs, long and low. It's nice, talking like this. Perrie feels like she hasn't got a chance to do this for awhile, and she's missed hanging out with Jesy when it's just the two of them, how they did when they still lived together.
"I used to play house when I was a little girl," Perrie says. "And all the other kids would get mad because they wanted to play something else, and I wouldn't let them. I'd make them sit and pretend that we were all a big family and I was the momma."
"You came home after your first date with Jade and talked about what you were going to name your future kids," Jesy says dryly.
Perrie laughs delightedly. "I did! God, I must've sounded like a nutter."
"Wasn't the first time, won't be the last," Jesy says.
"I've wanted a family for as long as I can remember," Perrie says softly. She wishes that she'd known that when the time came for it to actually happen, she'd feel a bit terrified.
Before Jesy can say anything, there's a loud, "Hallo," that travels through the flat, and a minute later Leigh-Anne sticks her head in the room.
"It's your errand girl, come with goodies," she says, then wastes no time crawling into bed with them to make a huge pile of limbs. "You lot stink."
"We haven't showered yet," Perrie whines.
"Go on with you, we have shopping to do," Leigh-Anne orders, and Perrie regretfully leaves them on the comfortable bed to wash up.
After Perrie takes a normal-timed shower and Jesy takes the longest shower that's ever existed, they order takeaway curry from Perrie's favourite place - even though there's a closer one - and Perrie manages to badger Leigh-Anne into giving her a foot rub. By mid-afternoon she feels a little less anxious than the day before, and almost like herself again.
Eventually she manages to drag herself out of Jesy's flat, and they hit the shops for a pram.
"What about this one?" Jesy asks, pointing to a fancy looking pram that's all done up inside with green fluff.
"It looks nice," Perrie says, looking round. The shop is filled to the brim with baby things - cribs and diapers and swingsets and moses baskets. Perrie feels lost just looking around, and one of the prams look like what she wants, but she's not even quite sure what that is. "Is it safe enough?"
"They're not allowed to sell them if they're not safe enough," Leigh-Anne says. "This one's got only one front wheel so you can go jogging with the baby."
"When have I ever wanted to go jogging?" Perrie asks. She checks the price tag on the one that Jesy's looking at, then drops it quickly. "Jesus Christ."
"What?" Leigh-Anne asks, as Jesy grabs for the tag.
"Who has that kind of money?" Jesy says. "What, does it come with a butler as well?"
"Or a nanny to change nappies," Perrie says. "I could do with one of those. I've never changed a nappy before."
"What, never?" Leigh-Anne asks. "Not even baby-sitting? Or with your nieces or nephews?"
Perrie shakes her head, and tries not to think about the loads of baby stuff she's never done before.
"You'll learn quick," Jesy says. "Oh, this one's way less money, come over here."
Perrie obligingly trots over to the new pram Jesy's inspecting; it looks the exact same as the other one.
"Is it different?" she asks. The inside maybe looks a little less green.
"It's not a carrycot, car seat, and moses basket all-in-one," Jesy says.
"Right, yeah," Perrie says. She should've known that, probably. They don't have a moses basket yet, she doesn't think. She's not sure if they need one, or if Jade's thought of it, or if she's meant to be looking for one as well as a pram, because apparently they can be the same thing.
Jesy's still saying something, and Perrie nods like she's actually paying attention. She knows she probably should be, but there's just so much to remember. Not just about the pram, but about everything. She's going to cock it all up, she knows she is.
"What's it like?" Leigh-Anne asks, appearing next to her elbow. Perrie jumps a foot, and the baby kicks hard in response.
"Fucking hell," Perrie says. "Warn a girl. What's what like?"
Leigh-Anne nods towards Perrie's stomach. "Being up the duff."
"It's like carrying a boulder on my frontside," Perrie says. "I can never get comfortable anymore, and I'm not allowed to sleep on my back because I might stop breathing."
"God," Leigh-Anne says, obviously appalled. "You might stop breathing?"
"That's all the boring stuff," Jesy says, draping an arm around Perrie's shoulders. "What about the fun stuff with pregnancy?"
"It's, well," Perrie rubs a hand over her stomach. "It's like- sometimes I lay in bed and I just feel him kicking and turning round, and it's like I already have this bond with him, you know? Like he's already this little person that I know and love even though I haven't met him yet. He's just- he's mine, yeah? He's my baby."
Leigh-Anne coos, and Jesy smiles and briefly tightens her grip around Perrie's shoulders. "I'm going to be the fun boozy aunt," Leigh-Anne proclaims loudly. "Letting him steal drinks of my vodka at fourteen, teaching him to always carry a flask, the whole deal."
"So you'll be the alcoholic aunt, then," Jesy says. Leigh-Anne makes an outraged face and reaches around Perrie to tickle at her.
"Well I'll be the responsible aunt," Jesy says, once she's wormed away from Leigh-Anne's wiggling fingers. "I'll make sure he gets all his homework done on time and passes all his A-Levels."
"You'd never," Perrie cries instantly, while Leigh-Anne practically doubles over in laughter.
"And I'll make sure he brushes his teeth the appropriate amount and the he'll never eats sweets after tea," Jesy continues. Even Perrie's laughing now, unable to stop herself. "And I'll teach him how to properly make a bed and wash behind his ears."
"Have you run out of responsible things to say?" Leigh-Anne asks. "Were those all you can think of?"
"The day you yourself learn to properly make a bed I'll eat me own toes," Perrie says.
"Rude," Jesy says.
"You can start being responsible by paying for this pram," Perrie says pointedly.
"The baby's not born yet, I can't start until then," Jesy says in an American voice.
"Oh my god, what's wrong you with?" Leigh-Anne says back, also in an American voice.
"Well someone's got to pay for this, so I guess I will," Perrie says, rolling her eyes in fake exasperation. She grabs the cheaper pram Jesy was looking at, and Jesy tucks her arm into the crook of her elbow while Leigh-Anne slides an arm around her waist, and they march through the aisles of the shop just like that.
Perrie loves her girls. She feels safe tucked between them, even though she still does miss Jade. It's hard to feel scared when she feels so loved.
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